{'fraction_non_alphanumeric': 0.029850746268656716, 'fraction_numerical': 0.002798507462686567, 'mean_word_length': 4.5595854922279795, 'pattern_counts': {'":': 0, '<': 0, '<?xml version=': 0, '>': 0, 'https://': 0, 'lorem ipsum': 0, 'www.': 0, 'xml': 0}, 'pii_count': 0, 'substrings_counts': 0, 'word_list_counts': {'cursed_substrings.json': 0, 'profanity_word_list.json': 0, 'sexual_word_list.json': 0, 'zh_pornsignals.json': 0}}
The Contradictions in Horticulture as We Enter the Last Decade of the 20th Century Presidential Address1


Once upon a time, in a far-off land, a member of the genus Gallus was walking through a forest populated with trees of the genus Quercus. Suddenly, something fell and struck this creature on the head. The creature was quite cowardly—you might even call it “chicken”—and it began to run and cry, “The sky is falling, the sky is falling, and I must tell the king”. On the way to the palace, she encountered other feathered members, whose names are really inappropriate to use in a sophisticated presidential address—names such as Henny Penny, Cocky Locky, Goosey Loosey, and Turkey Lurkey—and she told them the news and they joined her in her rush to see the king. They then met a rather devious character, who said he would show them a short-cut to the palace, but he really intended to have a sumptuous dinner of low-cholesterol, low-protein poultry products. Chicken Little forever remained a pessimist and never again went into the oak forest without an umbrella.