Who said you have to figure out everything in your 20’s?


Do not deny. You read this because in the deepest core of your heart, you feel pressure – perhaps anxious. Pressure because of the expectations other people are putting towards you. Anxious because of the uncertainty of the future, of yourself, and the fulfilment of your dreams.

Truth be told, you are fooling yourself in a belief that you can figure all things out in your twenties. You have been brainwashed, conditioned by the idea that you can achieve your vision, goals, and so-called “success”. Well, it is true, no question about that, except for the idea that you can fulfil them all in just a short period of time.

And achieving them all in your twenties? Well, you have to think deeply.

This idea, which is fostered by society, that you need to “be settled” with everything in your twenties is providing you resistance and pressure to live fully, in your own ways, in your own values and convictions.

You are not following your truest passion because you think that if you fail at it, you lose time. You are not pursuing that motherfucking thing because you’re worried that if you messed up, you will be judged and criticised by your family, friends, and relatives.

I must say, twenties is the best time you have to be dangerous. It is a time you still don’t have kids to feed on, wife to be devoted on, and family to take care on. It is the time when you do not have many responsibilities. Meaning, you have a choice to take enormous risks because there is nothing much to lose. It is the time you have to take a leap of faith, to jump that cliff, and let yourself fall to the ground so you learn faster than anybody else.

And while you are learning, not only you’re gaining leverage, but you’re also becoming better, wiser, and stronger. Twenties is the best time to pursue your wildest passions, your ambitious goals, and your most dangerous curiosity.

Let me ask you, when is the best time to let yourself fall to the ground? When you are twenty years old with no enormous responsibility, or when you are already 40 years old when responsibilities are bloody-eating your life (when you cannot leave your job because you have a family to feed on)?

Of course, your answer is the former.

Twenties is the best time to feed yourself of failures. No, I don’t mean failures, I mean learnings. The more you fail, the more you learn. And the more you learn, the wiser you are.

You first need to bleed deeply before lightness to be experienced.

So, try to eliminate the expectations that you must achieve your wildest dreams in your twenties, or don’t expect that your twenties will be the happiest moments of your life.

Treat it as a learning phase. Consider it as a point in your life that you are preparing for something bigger than your current self. When you deeply realise it is only a learning stage, you become willingly-open to take risks and accept failures. As a result, it takes away resistance and pressure. Thus, life becomes more meaningful and vibrant.

You have to trust, love, and embrace the process. You do not need to settle everything in your twenties. It is an illusion. Do not compare yourself to other people, but to who you were yesterday.

Each one of us has own timeline of fortune in our lives. You may be flattered with glimmering recognition today, and be a crack head next week. Life has so much more to give than achieving all the list of wants and desires in an instant, immediate manner.

Don’t be a fan of time, but of journey. When you are old with limited physical energy, lying on your deathbed, what will truly matter is not the number of years you had in this physical earth, but the journey you endured and willingly-accepted in your life.

Look at the successful entrepreneurs out there, those who already achieved a fortune or massive success in their lives, you will notice that they are on their 40’s, 50’s and 60’s. Why? Because they already paid the price during their twenties. They took responsibility for their goals, and they failed countless times.

Use your twenties on your side. Consider it as learning phase and a time for massive transformation. Have faith in the process. And do what you need to do, one thing at a time, right here, right now.

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