If Elvis Had Facebook

If Elvis had Facebook you could friend him. The rest of his friends would receive a notification that you are now Elvis’s friend. You could scroll through his timeline which not all believe ended August 16th 1977. There is some evidence that Facebook has made it such that not everyone’s life ends when the death certificate is issued.

A disturbing trend has emerged where the rest of dead speak to us through Facebook, reminding us of their birthdays. Other social media, LinkedIn for example has advised me my dead client has a new acquaintance. Perhaps they are linked on the other side of the Great Divide. Perhaps on the other side Elvis still curls his lip in a sort of smile when he hears applause, and then says “Thank ya, Thank ya very mush”.

I will inquire of Mr. Zuckerberg what this all means.

Dear Mr. Zuckerberg,

According to our coroner, my client died last year. Yet he still keeps popping up on your service popularly known as “Facebook” referencing new connections and a birthday. Is there something metaphysical about this phenomena? Are you now conducting séance or is there some new dimension to life?

Please advise at your earliest opportunity. Thank ya, thank ya very mush.


Mark T. Patterson II Attorney at Law