all 134 comments

[–]5 Endorsed ContributorStayinghereforreal 199 points200 points  (10 children)

I looked her up via Google and saw that she eventually got married, I'm pretty sure it was to the guy she dropped.

She only took a "break" with him, don't you know, to "find herself", before realizing she loved him totally and completely. He has no idea what the real story was....and still is.

[–]Rugnardl 82 points83 points  (6 children)

God this fucking makes me hurt inside. Poor guy.

[–]3 Endorsed ContributorSkorchZang 61 points62 points  (5 children)

Don't poor guy him, that guy is all of us...

I try to take some consolation in the knowledge that it simply isn't about the guy, it's all the woman's story. She's always the radiant dynamic strong willed lead in this movie called Real Life. From time to time a prop called "some guy" becomes useful and is introduced. She doesn't have any ill will toward these. They're just interchangeable props, all she cares about is to look good, and to have it fit her well for the scene.

[–]1Dev_on 2 points3 points  (0 children)

having empathy for the bad fortune of others isn't a bad thing you know.

[–]Rugnardl 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I pity him for the cage he's in, not the one who put him in it. It's what she does. And while we would use that knowledge to resist her, he never even knew what was happening.

[–]1johnnight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That guy is making less money than OP and can't get her all that kitchen stuff. She will make his life hell for this, forever.

[–]nourathrowway 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yep, I'm sure she just "bumped into" OP by chance at a...gas station, and there was instant chemistry that made her break off the engagement. Nothing sexual until after they started dating mind you!

Women are pros at trickle truth.

[–]RegentsEnd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It makes me sick to think that this probably what happened.

[–]LittleCrazee 135 points136 points  (12 children)

To most women, a man’s value is always relative to other men she believes are obtainable.

That is about as succinctly put as is linguistically possible to explain the reality of hypergamy.

Great story. I second not being that guy.

[–]romegas314[S] 26 points27 points  (1 child)

Thanks for the kudos. I spent a good while trying to phrase that particular sentence right; I'm glad it was well-received.

[–]ofthrees 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It gave me pause as well. Utterly true, and well said.

[–]1Watermelon_Salesman 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I have to second this and upvoting doesn't feel like enough. That phrase is perfectly succint and really pins it all down to a very simple concept, in a few simple words. That's the kind of writing we all need, and that's the kind of writing that is sometimes well received outside of this sub, without specific RP terminology and buzzwords.

[–]through_a_ways 7 points8 points  (0 children)

For the new people here, an intuitive way to internalize this:

You have a nice, cute, sweet girlfriend. One day, you see a girl with bigger tits and curvier hips.

Most men wouldn't leave their girlfriend for that, even if they had access (probably just pump and dump and forget).

[–][deleted]  (7 children)


    [–]LuvBeer 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    I'm familiar with the rule, but don't understand how it relates here?

    [–]RP-on-AF1 -1 points0 points  (4 children)

    That's laughable. I guess you were never in the military, or you'd know about the 2-10-2 effect. I also went to college at a predominately male engineering school and the same rules applied.

    [–][deleted]  (3 children)


      [–]RP-on-AF1 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      2 before deployment, 10 during deployment, 2 after deployment. Also known as a desert queen. I'm just saying men must certainly do judge on a relative scale.

      [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I think thats an army thing. We just call it 'Navy Hot' where I'm from. Especially on mids watches, when red lights remove all kinds of facial defects. Though now that porn is easily accessable, guys mostly have a baseline again.

      though definitely not an 80 20 thing

      [–]17 Endorsed ContributorJP_Whoregan 76 points77 points  (11 children)

      This story is actually a pretty good example of how modern technology is not a check on female hypergamy, but rather an aid to it. Think about it; if not for this woman using the internet to look up "old friends", this whole situation never happens in the first place.

      • She never trashes her engagement
      • Beta husband-to-be doesn't have to sell the ring he foolishly bought
      • You don't waste 6 months investing in a gold-digging whore with no shred of loyalty
      • By all accounts, you'd probably have never seen this girl again. In retrospect, that probably would have been a good thing for all parties involved.

      It all ties back to that article from the front page a few days ago: if she branch swung to be with you, she will branch swing to a new man just as easily. Women know this, which is why I suspect she hid beta hubby-to-be from you the whole time. Just so happens it backfired on her this time and she had to swing back.


      Poke ... Poke ... get off my branch, bitch.

      [–]FiveRows 9 points10 points  (2 children)

      What bothers me about this situation is that the class of technically-minded men that slave away building and engineering this technology are often times the same ones that suffer the most at the hands of modern female hypergamy, which this technology enables like nothing else before.

      [–]17 Endorsed ContributorJP_Whoregan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Very true. Sort of like how ISIS makes its victims dig their own graves.

      But joking aside, yes. Even a software engineer who has a good looking woman is literally only one layoff away from that woman looking for a new branch.

      [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      If we want to lament people acting against their best intersts, we can take this conversation in so many directions...

      [–]IronMentat 6 points7 points  (5 children)

      Yes, it seems that the modern easy means of contact and recontact, i.e. social networks, google lookups, social networks, and even dating sites, are all means to establish a perpetual hypergamy treadmill for women.

      This is sad for both sexes, as we see many attractive women today reach early 30's still in singlehood, hit the wall, and settle down with a beta guy.

      [–]1Dev_on 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      good for them, really. You, as a man, just have to learn the rules of the new game and act accordingly.

      If you'll forgive the gaming metaphor here, lots of people bitch and moan when a new mechanic ruins their playstyle, but the smart people learn it and adapt.

      It's not bad or good, it's pretty neutral, and it's up to us to sink or swim. God knows is women get to have a free and liberal lifestyle, can't fault em for taking advantage. Hell, I'm waiting for the moment where post 30s pregnancy is no longer a medical concern... Not having the wall will free us from all kinds of pitfalls, and we can truly get what benefits us, and not use each other for our own goals.

      If you want a family, this weeds out the hypergamists, if you don't it weeds out the baby crazies.

      Its a good thing if you look at it the right way.

      If the femenist push for all this makes women miserable, thats unfortunate, but it's not my problem. not my movement, and not my responsability. Eventually enough people may be miserable enough to stop facilitating crazy ideologues, I say bring it.

      Until then. I'm just out for my 'shawshank' moment, where I get to sand my boat at the beach

      [–]IronMentat 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Thanks, I feel somewhat inspired by your attitude.

      [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      No problem. Is odd here sometimes when people come here, specifically to see the world as it is, then get irritated when things don't fit their mold...

      I prefer to try to find the positive side of it. Change is a good thing, keeps life from getting Boring

      [–]17 Endorsed ContributorJP_Whoregan 4 points5 points  (1 child)

      perpetual hypergamy treadmill

      Fantastic visual metaphor. I like it. I immediately got a mental image of a woman running on a treadmill, right next to her hamster on its wheel.

      [–]IronMentat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      And they run until they fall off the treadmill and hit the wall behind it.

      [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      everything is easy. Thats what the internet is for, an extension of networks and social constructs.

      It's just the same as it always was. Appliances, automation and birth control freed up more time for people to do more together too.

      There is no golden era where things were difficult but satisfying.

      [–]abdada 33 points34 points  (5 children)

      A little aside here:

      You know why women under 26 are so much better than women over 26?

      This shit.

      I made a mistake in LTRing a gorgeous, sweet, active and individually wealthy gal. After 6 months she immediately started planning the wedding and how I need to dump everyone else I'm with.

      Yeah, I walked. Ruining a good thing because all the fat useless friends are spitting out vermin from their loins. No thanks.

      [–]tracer123 1 point2 points  (4 children)

      You went nuclear when you probably could have gotten another year out of it.

      [–]abdada 22 points23 points  (2 children)

      Wasn't worth it because she will make a great wife, I just didn't want to marry her. Ends up she pinged me again 6 months later for a short validation romp, but my investment wasn't there anymore.

      If you want to spin plates, spin them while they're young and carefree. That 27-31 age group is just drama.

      Unless you're looking for a wife. Then stick to the pre-27 age range anyway.

      [–]52576078 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      They're drama right up to 40, my friend. They start to chill out a bit after that.

      [–]abdada 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I don't agree. I'm 40. Been dating for 27 years. I prefer low energy girls with feminine behaviors. Most of my flings and LTRs have been very drama-free.

      But I avoid losers. No alcoholics or drug users. No women with excess debt who can't pay rent. No tattoo or piercing fetishes.

      The last drama I had was with a tattooed hippie. Real mess. Drank. That was 6 years ago.

      AWALT but some women do amazing when they accept a leader who engages reward/punishment directions.

      [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I would have just laid out what I want, and she can join, or step. In fact, it's really what I did with mine now.

      [–]Dr_Wally 31 points32 points  (5 children)

      To be honest, I would have broken my engagement off too if I knew you had a KitchenAid mixer.

      [–][deleted]  (3 children)


        [–]Dr_Wally 11 points12 points  (1 child)

        you're the guy i would have broken off my engagement with.

        [–]1Dev_on 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        depends, if he got the high quality one with the metal gears, I'd probably go down on him

        [–]monsieurhire2 87 points88 points  (33 children)

        "Most women, even a nice, moral woman, are constantly looking to upgrade."

        " She’s very hot, she’s smart, she’s fun, and – and this is important, it really matters – she was nice. A really, genuinely nice person. A thoughtful, down-to-earth person. We hook up a few times but she always kept me at arm’s length. I’m an orbiter. She was always in LTRs with the same type of guy – wealthy, alpha."

        Nice appears to be a word that has lost all meaning. Perhaps you meant "polite?" As in, she wasn't cursing and insulting you constantly? Also, "moral?" What kind of moral woman enters into a relationship that purports to be about "love" and then looks to "trade up."

        People often ascribe virtue to individuals with wealth and beauty. This is because they are so often depicted in the media as being virtuous.

        But there was NOTHING virtuous about this girl from day one.


        Her promiscuity. She cheated on her boyfriends with you. She went radio silent on you. That's fucking cowardly. She looked you up to see how you were doing. Bullshit. In the age of Google, it is likely that she did some detective work to see if one of her stocks had matured into a blue-chip. All that shit she said about your money was just the icing on the cake. Also, she cheated on her fiance with you. And she lied to you about even having a fiance. And she was looking to sponge off of you.

        How is ANY of this "nice" or "moral" behavior? It's not.

        Good job on the using her for sex part though because that's EXACTLY what she deserved.

        [–]ilirm 29 points30 points  (1 child)


        Its not, but genuinely nice women are so hard to find that we have had to redefine the word to mean...not a bitch.

        A sad state of affairs. A lot of the time they don't even realize that what they are doing is wrong on a fundamental level. Its like this blind narcissism has gotten a hold of a whole generation of women.

        [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        most women are basically polite and 'nice'.

        They have a real aversion to conflict, so short of drunken bar kids, I don't think you've seen many truly assholish girls

        [–]romegas314[S] 18 points19 points  (1 child)

        My bad on the wording - she didn't cheat on her BFs with me, she just would hook up with me in between her "real" relationships. Kinda dumb of me but I didn't quite value myself back then. I'd also add that I've got no beef with the radio silence, everyone's totally within their rights to do that.

        Everything else you said, though, I agree with.

        [–]1Dev_on 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        You do have a pretty good attitude about the whole thing, I wish more in here had the same dispasionate outlook on it.

        Out of curiosity, what are you working with in your kitchen? Because if shes' oggling your martha stewart/Rachael Ray collection, I'm going to have to facepalm

        [–]AGENT47BRO3886 33 points34 points  (17 children)


        This women is just another materialistic bitch. Commenting on OP's appliances? Geez, you guys need to watch yourself out there.

        [–][deleted]  (4 children)


          [–]AGENT47BRO3886 5 points6 points  (3 children)

          Good god man, are you kidding me? Have bitches really reached that low? Shit, I'll be telling these bitches I have maytag appliances if it gets them wet.

          [–]1Dev_on 6 points7 points  (0 children)

          you don't have to be so bitter about it. you can just call them women, all the hate does is make you look petty about it

          [–]16 Endorsed ContributorCyralea 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          It's an effect that's more pronounced in mid to late 20's women. When they see a well equipped home, they get all kinds of tingles.

          [–]DevuSM 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          I've seen it.

          I had a random come over off tinder at 1 am in the morning, and the second she got into my apartment you could see her attitude and eyes change as she saw all the shit I had. Kind of a "I could live here" type of vibe.

          Banged her and never responded to her texts.

          [–]Philhelm 13 points14 points  (11 children)

          I know, right? Fucking appliances? Seriously? I guess I'm from a different culture because I wouldn't even know what the top brands are.

          [–]spitfire7rp 34 points35 points  (9 children)

          Not to mention she probably cant cook anything besides ramen anyway

          [–]popthatpill 5 points6 points  (8 children)

          I've always wondered why women are so obsessed with kitchens, appliances, granite countertops etc etc etc. How many women can cook?

          [–]sreggin_llik 12 points13 points  (6 children)

          It increases their status in the eyes of other women.

          [–]Iupvoteforknowledge 7 points8 points  (1 child)

          Precisely. Women want other women to envy them. It's some sort of sick pleasure for them.

          [–]GunsGermsAndSteel 2 points3 points  (2 children)

          ...As if they were responsible for acquiring those things.

          [–]sreggin_llik 2 points3 points  (1 child)

          To a woman, acquiring a man who can acquire things is the same thing as acquiring those things herself.

          [–]GunsGermsAndSteel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Yeah yeah, I know... It just drives me nuts still.

          On the other hand- I expect my wife to take pride in my accomplishments because she's been there every step of the way helping me get where I am now.

          But if she had no work invested in my success, I don't think I'd be okay with her claiming any portion of the credit.

          [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          nesting instinct. Especially if they have hoarder parents. The idea of collecting things gives a great endorphin rush.

          [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I'm suprised a lot of women do either. Considering I've known one girl in my life who was able to cook have decently (though I'm still better at it)

          [–]17 Endorsed ContributorJP_Whoregan 8 points9 points  (1 child)

          Very good, well thought out comment. The concept of the dilution of the word "nice" is probably worth it's own post and discussion. Because our society has "normalized" female entitlement and crass bitchiness, we are actually shock and awed when we come across one that is at least outwardly pleasant. But as you correctly point out, they're all morally bereft on the inside.

          Never let your guard down.

          [–]le_king_falcon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          The dilution of the word nice would make a great part in a post about how feminism has won the war of language through subversion and wholesale reclassification.

          Its something that TRP touches on when Rape culture and harassment are discussed but I'm not sure we ever had a top drawer post examining the phenomenon.

          [–]Skiffbug[🍰] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          I think he meant that she wasn't the kind of girl that ditched or trampled people, didn't cheat in school, didn't cheat with money, etc. I also didn't read that she slept with him while in a relationship.

          What the story says is that even someone who seems well rounded and not into that sort of behaviour is still AWALT.

          [–]red_gerb 5 points6 points  (0 children)

          Moral behavior... I use to think church was for the Men to go and get forgiveness. how mine eyes have seen the glory. It's for the women!

          [–]satisfyinghump 3 points4 points  (1 child)

          She cheated on her boyfriends with you.

          This is usually a big warning, since it means that there is no moral line in her head that would stop her from doing that to you as well, once you are happily married.

          [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I like skiffbugs word better 'pleasant'

          it's so much more accurate

          [–]1exit_sandman 0 points1 point  (3 children)

          She went radio silent on you. That's fucking cowardly.

          Well, cowardice >>> giving him the LJBF-speech and keeping him as an orbiter.

          However, her later behavior was absolute beyond despicable.

          [–]monsieurhire2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Eh, I think the LJBF speeches are better, because at least the guy should reasonably know where he stands, whereas radio silence leaves too much room for doubting and hoping.

          [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (1 child)

          What do you think she should do? challenge him to a 1v1 duel?

          I mean really. aversion to conflict is pretty standard, you can't really shit on a girl for it.

          [–]1Dev_on 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          It's like calling someone nice. As if not being downright miserable to be around is a virtue.

          [–]reddiforlove 28 points29 points  (8 children)

          Great story, you literally couldn't make this shit up.

          That plot twist at the end so completely informs all of her bizarre actions, like that unhappy look she had the morning after, it's insane. Her hamster must have been working so hard to justify what she'd done and what she was about to do to that poor sap back home.

          [–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad[🍰] 24 points25 points  (5 children)

          it's insane

          No, it's very cunning and calculated. We just fall for the sweet illusions they project.

          [–]RP-on-AF1 1 point2 points  (4 children)

          Your comment seems to run counter to OP's response in this thread. Can behavior be both calculated and self-deceiving?

          [–]sumdumguy-throwaway 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          I am convinced most women are blind to their own shitty behavior.

          [–][deleted]  (2 children)


            [–]Heuristics 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            where does logic come from?

            [–]romegas314[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

            Haha, yeah, I have to admit after that bombshell was dropped and she left I spent the better part of the next week reevaluating everything we'd done in that context. There's a lot more to the story (isn't there always?) but I figured I'd just include the important bits.

            Have to say -- if I had hooked up with one of her friends, and not her, I'm sure she would have driven home to her fiancé the next day truly happy to be with him. Her capacity for self-deceit...just wowza.

            [–]BhiQ 8 points9 points  (0 children)

            I mostly just felt bad for the guy.

            At that point I was about to say that OP probably saved his life but that final sentence just crushed all my hopes :( Poor guy.

            [–]Popeman79 15 points16 points  (2 children)

            This is exactly the type of story a lot of us have stumbled upon at some point in our lives, and that has led us to the TheRedPill here, and to feeling disgusted by women in general (one of the step of swallowing the pill).

            Thanks for sharing so genuinely, great read!

            [–]GunsGermsAndSteel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            This statement does not represent me. I am not disgusted by women. I just have a better understanding of what to expect from them than I used to. But I love women.

            [–]sumdumguy-throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            imagine a guy a little more trusting, a little less jaded, a little less suspicious.


            [–]MLMIKE39 36 points37 points  (4 children)

            "Most women, even a nice, moral woman, are constantly looking to upgrade. They’re always assessing a man’s value, financial or otherwise... "

            If she's a "nice, moral woman", she may think about it, but wouldn't actually go through with it.

            [–]spectrum_92 8 points9 points  (1 child)

            I agree, a seriously moral girl would not sleep with a guy a few hours after meeting him when she's engaged. Despite u/romegas314 insisting she was a decent girl, if his story is correct then she cut off contact with him in college because he was poor and asked her out. She sounds like she was a bit of a bitch from the start

            [–]sir_wankalot_here 4 points5 points  (0 children)

            Seriously moral girl equals bitch :-) She did not sleep with the guy a few hours after meeting him, she tracked the guy down. I had a kind of similar incident happen to me. When I used to be a good Christian and go church, I said hi to this ok looking good christian chick. Chick kinda looked down her nose at me. Then she is talking to my friends and finds out I have a good job. Literally the next time I went to a youth group activity, and we where watching a movie, when the lights went out the chick all of a sudden got really close to me. Then if something happens the church will gang up on you and try and get you to marry the chick. Anyway i avoided the chick.

            Another good chistian chick, I already mentioned this one. She is engaged. She then goes to another town to meet me and we do all sorts of really nasty shit. I am married to boot and we do all sorts of nasty shit together. Good christian chick who teaches subday school.

            [–]sir_wankalot_here 15 points16 points  (1 child)

            Moral woman translates into more inclined to branch swing.

            [–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad[🍰] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

            Yep. All morality means is they'll play one guy at a time to maintain GG status. Serial monogamy. Switching branches might take them two heartbeats instead of one.

            [–]Berkut22 11 points12 points  (1 child)

            I was in the exact same situation, except she was still f*cking the ex-fiance while we were dating, until he found out and chucked her out. Then she tried to claim common-law divorce and take his stuff. He lost his shit on her, she told him it was all my idea to get his money, and then he had a PI follow me 24/7 for 4 months.

            The only reason I know all of this is that she eventually ran off with my best friend, and I ran into the ex-fiance at a pub and we had a beer and shared each other's side of the story.

            [–]evilquesadilla 8 points9 points  (1 child)

            Women are very good with words. They have euphemisms for everything. They are also very good at being someone they want others to see.

            Good job not getting hooked to a gold digger.

            [–]gmflag 5 points6 points  (0 children)

            That is the scary thing these days which led me to go full monk mode after spinning plates for a while. It's hard for me to tell if a girl is truly genuine or just molding herself to fit the form that works.


            Truly enjoyed this. Congrats on your success in life and not letting another person hijack it. These shameless attempts by women no longer surprise me. It's really sad how many think they deserve this or that by virtue of being born with a vagina.

            You and your mission come first.

            [–]Imapancakenom 7 points8 points  (0 children)

            I enjoyed this very much, this story was terrific. Thank you for sharing.

            What I love about TRP is just how it helps us learn to see reality.

            There’s no reason to be mad about it. Might as well be angry about the tide coming in. It’s just the way things are, accept it and work with it.

            I like how this was the last thing you said to tie it all up, I agree completely that this is the entire point. Females are gonna female, see them for what they are. I'm impressed with how solid you seem my friend. Keep being you.

            [–]raystantz 6 points7 points  (1 child)

            Dude this shit rings so true for me right now. This girl and I had a thing in undergrad for a few months like 8 years ago. She was always very cool. Dumped me out of the blue because she found someone cooler.

            And it hurt, it did. She was going to be a lawyer too and we came from neighboring home towns, saw eye to eye, and blah blah blah. So I slayed some dragons and went on with my life.

            Last week I get a friend request from her. I'm pumped because I am the man I always wanted to be. Business owner, still lift, white picket fence and just a great life. Not bragging either but I was proud to show her what she let go.

            Anyway she's an attorney and married to some short stubby guy. She is immediately flirting and texting like crazy. I think she's only been married like 2 years and the guy obviously provides for her and stuff. They just got back from an Alaskan cruise.

            Anyway she's texting today and we're having a blast reminiscing and flirting. She wants me to come to her office to help her review this oil and gas lease and keeps saying how jealous she is that I'm not at work and how I've set my life up and whatever. I'm babysitting my nephew and niece so I decline. She says "Don't know if you noticed but I finally got the bulldog I've always wanted," and not really thinking I say, "Sorry I try not to creep on married women's fb pages, whats its name?" which isn't true at all I went through that shit like I just decrypted the Rosetta Stone.

            First time in like 100s of flirty messages that I bring up that she's married and she responds with, "Oh no? You just like to send inappropriate messages to married women? ;) Her name's xxx"

            Now I know it's just a shit test, but I just got so pissed. Went dark. The second I confronted her with the reality of her situation she puts on the good girl persona and acts like she wasn't just sending me pics of her in lingerie she bought me for my bday back in the day that she was pumped she could still fit in. Even the smartest and highest smv girls hamster, I think its a self defense mechanism.

            So dang frustrating. And infuriating thinking about the guy that gave her his name, his paychecks and signed a death contract but doesn't exist because she could have done better when she was a young adult. She just turned 30 and probably wants to cuckold him with my kid.

            Why can't women be cool?

            [–]sumdumguy-throwaway 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Why can't women be cool?

            I think this sums up a modern male's anguish more than anything else.

            [–]coffeebag 2 points3 points  (2 children)

            Isn't that just human nature though? I'm sure it applies to both genders. If you live in a nice house, but got a chance to get the mansion, wouldn't you?

            [–]Justathrowawayo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

            It depends on what I had to do to get it. I take loyalty seriously and cultivate loyalty in all my relationships.

            [–]GunsGermsAndSteel 3 points4 points  (0 children)

            Not if it meant fucking over someone I cared about and had made a commitment to.

            [–]ofthrees 3 points4 points  (0 children)

            You're a really good writer. Damn.

            [–]Stationarity 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Absolutely great story. Clearly a class A gold digging witch with no character whatsoever. To hook up with someone and then go radio silent is weaksauce. Then show up when you got some money...pathetic.

            [–]MickeyRoarick 2 points3 points  (2 children)

            Good story good writing.

            Was she older than you OP? I don't understand how she's still in grad school while you went through it and are working now. Perhaps she's slow and did the math on investing in getting a husband and realized it outperformed all other options on work in / payout.

            [–]romegas314[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

            No, she was actually a year younger. Just one of those women who decides in her late 20s to start a whole new career. With school paid for by daddy, naturally.

            [–]MickeyRoarick 4 points5 points  (0 children)

            I call those the circle-the-flushing-toilet-waiting-on-a-man-to-bail-me-out types.

            [–]gmflag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            I can say something similar happened to me. I saw hint 1 first though, and I purposesly trolled her by acting as beta as possible to get her off my back. Glad I dodged a bullet after learning she became super weird Feminist.

            [–]confuseacatlmtd 2 points3 points  (1 child)

            I remember 100 dollar handshakes :) I hope you take great care of your parents now that you've got some cash.

            [–]Jf5ve 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Your last line is great advice more people should adhere to. Having that saves so much hassle.

            [–]nigmondo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Great post op. Your last bullet point really resonated with me. If I had read this literally a week ago, I would have been raging at that selfish bitch. Now I'm just 'Meh.. It's true.. no need to be angry'. Thank god I'm finally out of the anger stage

            [–]Keninishna 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            hint #1 should of been she looked you up years after rejecting you. Women do not let their ego go easily.

            Also I've fucked married women before and chicks with boyfriends and what they do is they friendzone them for the time I'm with her and then go back to them when I'm done lol.

            [–]Krelious 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I think the important lesson is to never get attached to anyone because people are untrustworthy dicks regardless of gender. Its best to get what you want from someone but keep them on a short leash no matter how much you think you can trust them they always have ulterior motives especially once that lustful passion phase of the relationship fades.

            [–]1exit_sandman 1 point2 points  (1 child)


            Well, I'd say the danger becomes less once she has acquired a certain level of overall satisfaction.

            Don't forget, Libby was from money and here fiancé... well, wasn't the provider she wanted because he couldn't deliver what she was used from growing up. My best friend once had a girlfriend who was very much like Libby (minus the hotness), growing up with a well-earning father, and she constantly gave him hell because he wasn't as ambitious and well-earning as she would have wanted (fuck the fact that she was far better suited to do it because she had a better education than he did). They got together in her early 20s, but after her mid-20s, her priorities changed from "aaaaw I love my boyfriend" to "my boyfriend doesn't bring home enough money for me to blow" (literally, she was quite a materialistic cunt).

            I guess had Libby's fiancé satisfied her expectations, she wouldn't have been actively looking for an upgrade in the first place and also not have placed everything on one card so willingly just for a mere opportunity (by picking you, she was practically gambling away a sure thing - her engagement - in order to get a shot at an upgrade, and it may very well have backfired for her). Not defending her - after all, just growing up wealthy doesn't entitle her to an equally wealthy husband - just saying that the guy violated the rule to never trying to wife up a woman who is fundamentally dissatisfied with what he has to offer.


            The danger becomes less once she realizes she cannot climb any higher with what she has.

            The OP addresses this - obtainability. Libby is approaching the wall. If the OP were a stranger to Libby, he would no doubt pass her over. Libby exploited the fact the OP had something for her when he was younger was able to rekindle that.

            Otherwise, why would a rich guy in his 30s waste his time with a 30 year old woman?

            [–]1Dev_on 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I think the takeaway from this story isn't what people think it is.

            If you keep your head on straight, you can see signs, plain as day. It's not a manipulation, a lie or any other nonsense. You just have to keep your eyes open for the signs and act accordingly. the only one who would have been to blame for that trainwreck would have been you, had it progressed.

            Good dodge though.

            [–]BuffaloSoljah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Great story, thanks for sharing sir.

            [–]omglazers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Amazing story thank you for sharing.

            [–]3 Endorsed ContributorSkorchZang 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Well worth reading & thinking about.

            [–]Entershikari 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I just hope for you that you didn't spend too much on her

            Very informative and nicely wrote

            [–]narcissistic_walrus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            If you don't mind me asking, what do you do for a living?

            [–]trajanconquers89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Thanks for the reminder, OP. I hope we can keep getting quality posts like this one as this subreddit grows bigger.

            [–]wheyapartment 0 points1 point  (3 children)

            Does hypergamy have a limit?

            [–]1exit_sandman 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            Well, I'd say the danger becomes less once she has acquired a certain level of relative satisfaction.


            The OP answers this: "obtainability"

            [–]whitey_male 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            In the past this had me so confused. A lot of women want to hang on to their old boyfriends whilst fucking other guys in the hopes of moving up. It really grossed me out.

            [–]RegentsEnd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Great story, man. Thank you. The part about her going through your apartment and checking out your...appliances?! Blew me away. Can't believe there are people like that out there. Well, at least you got a shag out of it...

            [–]should_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)


            So as a recent college graduate I'm now wondering a few things...

            1.) I went to a nice respected college too. Is/was my wealth that apparent at school in terms of hooking up and LTRs? Is it alpha-with-bucks fucks and beta bucks? I arrived with a lot of anxiety that my own lack of dough would be blatant to everyone but it hadn't seem that way. Maybe the campus's hipster thing helps.

            2.) After reading (or writing) this story, are you encouraged to or discouraged from being showy in terms of suggesting you are wealthy to romantic/sexual prospects? Is it a good thing that they know/think you're rich, or not helpful? I feel like if we know that sex/love isn't about 'us' but rather our SMV, isn't money or the appearance of it another box to check? (Minus getting screwed over by a stay-at-home partner and divorce.)


            this is one of the most well-written, thoughtful stories I have read here. Thanks.

            [–]RmanRman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            A lot of guys get upset about this, but I completely agree with you. It's kinda just hardwired in them to go for the fitter, better looking, financially better off guy. I don't bare any ill will towards them for that. It's the nature of the beast. It's kind of a relief to be aware of this.

            [–]lubeoil -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            am i insane for preferring the days when fathers kept their daughters under lock and key?

            freedom can only be afforded by two people. men with money, and women who are pretty enough to leech off of them.

            but freedom never leaves either party with a good taste in the mouth.