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Login to the Upstart Friendship club and send in your Bad Luck Horrorscopes (all 12).

If your Horrorscopes are chosen for  publication, we'll send you a $50 The Warehouse gift card!

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CONGRATULATIONS to GEORGE CUMMINGS, 10, of Te Mata School, Havelock North. George wrote this month's Bad Luck Horrorscopes and has won $50 prize money.

Thanks to our ace illustrator, GRANT BROWN


You are bouncing on a trampoline and you go straight through it.


You are singing in front of an audience and you get the hiccups.


You are walking on a newly-laid concrete path, and get stuck because it hasn't set.


You are watching the latest movie when suddenly there is a power outage and you miss the ending.


You look in the mirror to comb your hair but suddenly the mirror breaks.


You are patting your dog and he vomits on your foot.


You are printing out your special homework presentation when the printer jams and wrecks it.


You are picking some fruit of a tree when suddenly you are rained on by hundreds of pieces of fruit all at once.


You are running late for school so you ride your bike as fast as you can - and the chain falls off half way there. 


You walk up to get your certificate at school assembly when there is a loud noise. You relise your pants have ripped apart.


You are holding your newborn cousin and he poops on yor arms.


You are walking to your house but discover the road has been closed and you can't get home.

What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Indian Ocean? Try to be more Pacific.

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