Dharma Talk, January 4, 2016: The Great Issue of Birth and Death

Download: http://www.riversidechan.org/lectures/Dharma_Talk_20160104.mp3                                    

          Today is January 4, 2016, a new year. I’ve written a bit in terms of some notes for my lecture tonight and whether to stay with the notes or not, I don't really know but I want to start out with a little bit of the puzzle to you and move on from there.
          This one has to do with my master, Master Sheng Yen, and he talked about the two great events in his life that had an impact on him. He grew up in China and as a young boy, he remembered crossing over a water canal and a low bridge. And as he was crossing over it, all the sudden a water buffalo came up out of the water by the side of the bridge and stood up. And he was quite frightened at this water buffalo coming up like that. It was something that shook him to the very core of his psyche and something happened in terms of that event that was so frightening to him that it actually became what you might call a Hua-tou - seeing what was there before the words came out, before the explanation as to what this water buffalo was. I don’t know if everyone’s ever seen a water buffalo but water buffalos are quite big. They’re not quite as big as a moose but pretty close; they’re like a moose without the antlers and they like have a black face. You can imagine this thing popping up like that, dripping water, and looking at him straight in the eye. But it really kind of shook him up. 
          The second story that he mentioned that had a great impact on him was that one day he was out in nature and he saw close by the river that a snake had cornered a frog. The frog when he went left, he would get grabbed by the snake and if he went right, the same thing and if he went forward, there is no hope at all. So he watched intently as to what the frog was going to do. The snake sat (I don’t know if snakes can sit) but the snake stayed passively waiting for the frog and it opened its mouth. The frog then jumped in to the snake’s mouth. So this had a very profound impact on him in terms of looking at the situation and saying “what indeed happen here?” I'm going to let you think about this while I talk today and we’ll come back and revisit the stories as to why these were such of an impact on Master Sheng Yen. 
          I've talked about this next story several times here recently, but I want to reiterate it to you. It’s about a master and his disciple. His disciple was summoned to his bedside and the master said that he had very few breaths left and that he wanted to know what the disciple had learned from him. And the disciple knocked over the medicine bottle that was by his nightstand. (Gilbert knocked over his water bottle that’s on the floor) 
          The master said, “Is that all you've learned?”
          And the disciple then set it right back up. (Gilbert set his water bottle right back up)  
          This story I told to two my students last month; both are no longer with us. Their understanding of the story was not in words. They understood it in a different way - in a way that I hope that you can take to heart; in what I'm going to be talking about today that you take to heart. We lost Valerie Littlehawk and we lost Kevin Allen; both great students, great practitioners. 
          One of the things that I frequently mention is that the ancient masters implored us that if we really want to the practitioners, we have to look into and resolve this great issue of birth and death. How many of you are afraid of dying, please raise your hands? Okay, it's an interesting thing you know, this idea of birth and death, this fear that one has of dying. We don’t tempt death and say well you know “I'm not afraid of dying” because you’ll end up in a situation where you may be dying or very close to it. But nevertheless, we begin to understand and look in to the idea of birth and death: birth and death of the breath, birth and death of an idea, birth and death of the moment, and we begin to see things in a different way. 
          Our bodies naturally have built-in to it certain safety mechanisms. Sometimes these mechanisms enable us to cope with the things around us. For instance, a person who has received a great emotional shock can like go into a catatonic state simply because the body cannot handle it, or it will avert its attention to something else, or wall it off. I don’t know how many of you have ever had something, an event in your life that your mind has walled it off but it can happen in this way. It’s the body's preservation mechanism that comes in with the package that we have when we’re born and is designed to protect the body. There’s a very interesting aspect as well to this because if we’re looking at it in a biological way, there’s the other aspect of the psyche. Now how does the psyche fit in with this idea of the biological protection, it nevertheless is there even though we can't really touch it like look at a corpuscle, or an organ or anything, but there's a psyche there that also functions in this regard through the brain organ and it protects and it keeps us from harm [so to speak]. 
          But somewhere along the line in our evolutionary process, this particular type of psyche created desires and vexations - the things that Shakyamuni Buddha saw in the Twelve Dependent Origination, all connected together and seeing things in this way and looking at how the world works. In order to see how the world works, we have to see how our “self” works and how the self connects with other things and then to look into it deeply, “what is really there?” “What is at the center of our discontent?” “What is at the center of our fear” and “What is the cure to that?”  
          It’s an interesting thing because when we say “What is that thing that’s spinning around that we call our “self?” Is it really, really there? Is it something else?” That is looking into this issue of birth and death and trying to see things from a non-verbal way, from a non-egocentric way. And it's really important and it’s vital to our practice in terms of being able to come to grips with that. It's not something easy because we are on top of this naturalness of the mind and replaced with the psyche and now bowed down to the psyche and all that the psyche creates. 
          Again like I mentioned at the start, this is not something that I’m not quite sure where I’m going to end up at part of this and I’m thinking through it as we’re going along but it’s important in terms of what I’m going to say next. This psyche is self-creating. It believes in its own existence. The idea of this soul is a psyche creation giving us a segregated value, segregated importance apart from other things. But in doing that, it creates an ignorance as to how we’re connected to each and every one of us, and how my thought affects your thoughts, and my speech affects your speech, and how my conducts affect your conducts, and makes my thoughts superior to yours [in terms of importance from this viewpoint]. 
          We, through our psyche, create an anthropomorphized creator. Someone in our image, which is now responsible for putting us here, is responsible for creating us and it's an easy way of us looking at things in terms of it and delegating responsibility. So as we search for meaning of this, we then lay it on the creator: creator did this; this is a divine plan. It may be a divine plan but maybe in a little bit different way than what we were looking at rather than somebody sitting on a golden throne determining which chess piece to move. It’s maybe the divine plan but in a different way. 
          When we look out into the world beyond that kind of a delegation to a creator, we never really look further. We just live our lives and it's too much to bother with. I often asked students “What is the purpose of life?” And there's pretty much [let's say] an American purpose of life default setting; which is you go to school, you get a job, you marry, you put out two kids or so, you retire, and then you die. But you're not here for that. You're here because there's something inside of you that says, “There’s got to be more than that. There’s got to be a meaning. There’s got to be a purpose. There’s got be something there.” And that's why you're here because that default setting doesn't work for you and you want to find something. So you come to the class and each week begin to show you how to look for that, how to investigate that. 
          But then you slip back into the default setting. You slip back into “What am I going to do? How am I going to pay the rent this month? Or how am I going to do this; or how am I going to get that project out? Or what's going to happen here? Or who is going to win American Idol?” I mean these are all important things in our life and we forget about the practice. Then we come back to class and you come in like sleeping zombies. I shook you and wake you up and you’re awake for while, and then you go back into it. But you still come because there’s something about it that bugs you and you want to get it resolved. So you come and you practice. Some of you practice more than others. Some of you practice in different ways. Some people exemplify the practice through their everyday life. I have a lot of students in this way. I also have students who work very good in studying the Dharma and practicing, or going to retreats, or doing transfer of merits, or do recitation, and others that just live the right life and know the difference in things. And when we come here, we really try to practice and try to wake up. 
          Sometimes, we never really seek to inquire about reality. But Chan is just that - looking into reality. It’s in that heart where we go “I want to know! What the heck is this? What is its purpose? What am I?” And more importantly, “what is all this? Where did it come from?” And you try to see and to fit the pieces together, but not from that egocentric viewpoint of it but trying to allow the psyche to be reabsorbed into mind itself and to come to a rest. There is a rest here. There is freedom and ease of body and mind so much that we are looking for it. It’s as if we are moving upstream and we taste the water. Initially the water tastes so stagnant and dull but as we keep going upstream, the water becomes purer, and purer, and purer until finally, the water is everywhere and whatever we taste of life, it's pure. It is in this way that’s an incredible illumination of the pure water. When we have this idea of this taste, we can never forget it and it serves as our beacon for us to continue on to practice, but more importantly, it gives us the faith and it gives us the initiative to help others and that’s important. 
          When we just reach a certain level and we stop there, it reminds me of several years ago when I had been putting some articles into a Christian Meditation Magazine. I read one of the articles from one of the other regular contributors, a very good practitioner, a Christian psychologist. His article that he had, I don’t know if he called it Touching the Hand of God but I equated it to that. He had this some kind of an experience but my comment was “That’s the door, not the room. One has to continue to go on. It's not enough to touch the hand of God; one has to continue on to search - “What is there?” What is there and keep looking.” I didn't mean to be demeaning to him. (That article didn’t get published) But what I was trying to say is that “don't sell it short.” 
          You never sell it short. Whether you're in this room, or you’re going to be listening to this by way the Internet, or reading this, be honest in your practice and keep trying hard in your practice. You keep going in terms of what you're doing. You don’t want to shake God’s hand; you want to shake up the world. I've seen this with Buddhist practitioners who are comfortable in the unified mind and then believing that it’s some kind of a realization. In true realization, the words to try to describe it do not exist but it is something that we work towards. It's difficult for us because when we go and we haven't had a real deep realization, we have to have faith that there's something there. But it’s difficult. I know that, but you have to press on. It's not in the acquisition of the realization. It's in the pursuit of the realization that we’re practitioners. 
          It doesn't matter where you get to. There are people who have realizations that don't even know that they got realization simply because they just act in the way that one would without the egocentric lifestyle. We have to explore till there's nothing left – this idea of Sunyata, this idea of emptiness. I wish I could come up with a different word than to say “emptiness” because emptiness is not really the proper word for it. If you came up with a better word for “Form is not other than thusness, thusness is not other than form,” it would be better than emptiness. Emptiness connotes nothing there but this is a living nothing there; not a dead nothing there. It’s not a vacuum. 
          And when they talk about the void, the same thing because the void looks like there's nothing there. It is void but in a wonderful, active, dynamic void that can only happen if there's this thusness present. As we practice, we get to stages where we aspire to this complete absorption. What is this absorption? Imagine, we talked about the psyche; if the psyche is reabsorbed back into the mind, how would the mind function at that point? It would function impeccably because it would be attuned with everything around us. Again, this requires faith. 
          And so we get to the main part of our lecture: 
          “During a war, there’s a saying that there are no atheists in a foxhole.” That means when one is close to the possibility of death, one begins to become more religious. So we need this faith but we need the right faith, and the right effort put forth. I've told this story before but again all these stories are kind of interconnecting into where I want to go with this lecture tonight.
          There is a story of a monk who was practicing diligently. So hard, he was practicing, practicing, but he couldn't get it. He couldn't get it. He was practicing with this master and finally went to the master and said, “I don't get it! I don’t get it!” So the master sent him away to another monastery.
          When he went to that monastery to practice, he was practicing there and again he went to the master and said, “I don't get it!” So the master said, “Give it four months.” 
          He practiced for another four months and again went to the master; “Give it another two months.” He practiced for two months and still, nothing there.
          Then finally he told him, “Give it another week and if you are not enlightened by then, kill yourself.”
          So the monk was quite shocked because he saw the seriousness in the master’s eyes and the belief that he would have no other alternative but to kill himself if he did not become enlightened. He saw that very clearly and that shocked him. And he began to practice more diligently, more seriously, as we say “practicing as if your head was aflame.” And he became enlightened. 
          Why did I bring this up? It’s because Kevin and Valerie went this way. They, in the end, practiced as if their heads were aflame. They really got into the practice. I spoke with Valerie, talked to her for a long time about the practice and she listened intently. I told her what was coming and she listened intently. I talked to her about many different subjects about the Dharma. She, in the end, knew it was the end way before she even came here to class that day to talk to us. She knew she was going and she knew she wanted to talk to me while her head was clear. When she practiced, in the end she practiced doing recitation for three days straight. And what was she saying Wendy? 
          Student: She was reciting the Four Great Vows and she also did recitation of the Buddha’s name. Then she did the Four Great Vows again and then she did... I don’t remember what it was but she did that one too.
          Gilbert: For three days straight. And then what happened at the end? What did she tell you at the end?
          Student: She was afraid she was going to be reborn in another realm and so she said, “Thank you for the practice.” Is that what you were talking about?
          Gilbert: She came into a reconciliation.
          Student: She was so scared and worried at first but she started and kept reciting the vows and the Buddha’s name and all of a sudden, there was this peace and she was calmer. She realized that this is not the end but it’s a new beginning. She was at peace at letting go of the body now because she knew where her spirit is. 
          Gilbert: This is practicing as if your head is aflame.
          Student: She has no fear, none. She was on this for eight years, this issue of birth and death, and all of a sudden it just struck her and she was totally at peace with it.
          Gilbert: So she died a good practitioner. She died with the idea of resolving this issue of birth and death.
          Gilbert: Now Kevin, on December 8 was sending me something. The Bodhi Day, the day that Shakyamuni Buddha they celebrate it as the day that he achieved enlightenment. Kevin was a musician so he sent me a picture of the Mila Buddha saying “Life is a beautiful thing” and he's playing a guitar. At this time he was gravely ill. And he wrote this:
          “Regrets that my health condition has kept me from physically attending classes and events. I read all of your Dharma talks and fantasize about going on your retreats. I felt that I should express my deep gratitude for sharing the Dharma and for helping and support those who are close to me, like Rachel. I know she is in best hand with you.” And so he said, “With deep respect…”
          And I wrote to him saying, “Kevin, so good to hear from you, sending you positive vibes, keep up the attitude, my pleasure to have you in one of my retreats. Take care, my brother.”
          (The attitude was that I understood where he was at or where he was heading, and understanding he was very sick even though it wasn't said there. And so my point was keep it this way). 
          And he wrote back to me on the 14th of December: “The universe is being immeasurably kind to me - giving me my own solitary retreat complete with attendance. (Wow!)  Surreal, it was like life was a forgotten dream and that is forgotten now too. This incomparable vastness, there's nothing to compare. Did you ever hear about somebody taking that old adage about nobody being guaranteed their next breath so seriously?” (Wow!) He goes, “Ridiculous! Keep on giving them hell you old scoundrel.” (Laughs…) 
          And now I wrote back, “Whoa, the medicine is kicking in!” [With a smile]. (More laughs…) What medicine is a that?
          Student: The Dharma.
          He goes, “That would be nice! LOL!!! LOL!!! Opium is available for the end stage if I want it.” 
          I said, “I want to stand a little bit further from the stage than that; thank you.” He was speaking in Chan or we’re speaking in Chan, and I said, “Hey stoner, I was referring to the true medicine; it was a double-entendre.” 
          And then I told him the story about the medicine bottle and the master. And in finishing that story I said, “The master nodded with the approval, “There's no way out to Samsara. The medicine is there to serve as an inexhaustible lamp to illuminate mind. Be certain about this.”  In other words from the great sage, Mr. Miyagi; “Daniel-san, best karate still inside of you; time to let it out.” Be fearless and be as clear of mind as you can. Use your vows as your compass to set your course. Don't thread on darkness and doubt but illuminate what mind is.”
          He wrote back two days later “Succinct, complete, beautiful, thank you so much for this.” And then he let me know that they were flying him down from Redding to Redlands. 
          Then I asked how he was doing and [you know] what was his condition. And he said, “Hey there, will reply to this at some length a little later this evening.  Dinner, a highlight of my day is about to be served.”
          I wrote back to him, “Of good, Jello!” (Laughs…)  And then I asked him and said, “On Christmas, you were going to get back to me, what's up?” 
          I know he is not doing too well at this point. And then he would talk to me about his very serious lung condition and heart condition that set on him very, very quickly. I said that I would see him soon. I didn't make it to the hospital in time to talk to him when he was alive but I can only communicate to him mind-to-mind. He had his beads and the cultural Japanese little cover thing from his Zen practice and also a dorge(?) so he had it all covered in terms of things he had. I think dorge is like a double-pastoral (?) and he was holding it. Even though he was unconscious, he was holding them. 
          The words he was saying to me were within just a week or so of his death. Valerie’s recitation for three days was completed and then she passed away that evening. These are about as perfect of endings as you can get. This is the reason why I'm sharing them with you because they are great practitioners. What I’m also sharing is that it took those events for them to really push and make that final push to practice. 
          When I went to New York to give the retreat, I exhorted the practitioners there to make that supreme effort then because they don't know when you’re going to get a chance like that again to practice when you have help and you are mindful of birth and death. But you practice as hard and I told them as well to practice as if your head was aflame. And a few days later, I saw two students doing that - practicing as if their heads were aflame. You don't need to wait to that time. You practice seriously. The opportunity to go to retreat, the opportunity to practice, the opportunity every day moment to moment is precious. So precious so don’t waste it. Keep moving, practice your hardest. That’s all I can tell you every single time you come here, is practice because you don't know. You don't know when it's your time. 
          In the end, both of them were fearless. They got it. They understood; maybe not a complete enlightenment but sufficient realizations to take them through. And we continue to transfer merit to them, to recite the Buddha’s name, to think of them and wish a beneficial rebirth to both of them. 
          Before I came here, I was listening to Master Sheng Yen talk about the Bardo period - how we can help those who’ve passed on. One, is to giving away their possessions and to let them know to continue on with the practice. And transferring the merit for them to have a more beneficial rebirth. This is part of the practice. When we talk about uplifting humanity, that's the next-generation. 
          So what about the frog? When Master Sheng Yen saw that the snake had cornered the frog and the frog jumped into the snake's mouth, why was that a significant event? You should be able to tell me that or I wasted words on you. 
          Student: Because the frog knew that it would happen anyway and he got himself ready.
          Gilbert: That’s right. The frog accepted the fate because it's the thusness of things. You’re all frogs; one day do you just wait for death to come, or do you practice and try to resolve it? You have a question?
          Student: More like the same answer but one answer is that like the frog, we are going back to this life for some reason. Not necessary a great idea but we’re probably going to jump into another life of…
          Gilbert: Yes, pretty much the idea is just seen as the way it is. And in this particular one, there was no play for the frog so the frog accepted the fate. It doesn't mean that the fraud committed suicide. You can't commit suicide by living; you commit suicide by running from death because you’ll come back again, and keep coming back again, and coming back again. If you accept the fate, you resolve the matter of birth and death. You see it as it is. You don't have fear in that moment. If you listen to what Kevin was talking about, he's not talking about words [in terms of what he’s saying]. There's an experience there that he's experienced and put down vexations. In that moment by putting down all those vexations and discriminations and desires, he puts down “self.” When he puts all that down, what it's replaced with is this incredible realization - wisdom pours in. It pours in gushing in. Why, because his entire life he practiced. He kept practicing and in that moment, it was for that moment that he was there; that it was his time of ripening.
          Just like Valerie fighting it and when she got to that point, she no longer had confusion. She was confused, confused but she wanted to sort it out. She wanted to see what was there. She had confused herself but once the self got unconfused, it was no longer existing. This is the thusness. When she was able to accept her fate, that was the suchness - jumping in to the snake’s mouth with no fear.  No jumping, no frog, no snake in this way. 
          The fear that Master Sheng Yen had when the water buffalo rose out of the water was a fear based on ignorance. A fear that was based on that he just saw this image coming up that he couldn't fathom. It was so big compared to him, a small boy. But it was enough for him to say “Why was I afraid? Why?” And looking at it and seeing because of self.
          So these are the two lessons that he learned, that he saw and used these as lamps to be able to guide him to say “I want to sort this out!” and he shared that with us. This is the way that we practice, is that we each serve as this inexhaustible lamp for others. We share the wisdom that we got. If we got a little bit of wisdom, share it. Wisdom is seeking wisdom; wisdom begets wisdom. Wisdom produces compassion because then we see the fate of all people around us and all the suffering, and all the clinging, all the vexations and discriminations, and we’re able to help people with that; to help them overcome these fears, this ignorance that cause us so much suffering. 
          This is the lesson today. It's not a lesson that's a sad lesson. It’s a lesson of inspiration but you don't have to wait until you’re on your death bed to do this. Please practice hard, practice very hard. When you practice, you'll achieve a realization - guaranteed. You have to have the idea of doing the right way and when you have the right way understanding everything clearly, then you have to generate the effort from that. With this Right View - how mind works you generate that and you’re no longer creating mythical images in your mind [whether it's you or somebody above you]. You're clear about it. And in that way, your transition is going to be much easier. Any questions? Okay, we’ll take our break.