back to article Queuing for an iPad? Why?

As the UK braces itself for tomorrow's iPad launch, one might wonder what the device is good for beyond providing entertainment during today's lacklustre TV shows. This evening the queues will start forming as fans chomp at the bit for the latest Apple bling. Tomorrow's news will no doubt be full of happy Apple customers being …


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  1. Modjo30


    If you're one of the people that will be buying a Large Trigger happy TV style Ipod Touch then you can just call yourself a sheep that can't think for themselves, there are better devices out there at a cheaper price and not locked down like everything that Apple bring out

    1. Anonymous Coward

      OK, I'll bite...

      Presumably then, you:

      1. Own a tiny TV instead of a big one since smaller is obviously better

      2. Use a non-Windows PC since following the "crowd" is stupid

      3. Drive a Kia C'eed instead of a VW Golf since the former is cheaper

      4. Spend all you days trying to run (and use) Photoshop on a tiny, underpowered netbook just because it is technically possible

      Has it ever crossed your mind that an iPad buyer may actually have considered what they primarily use a computer for, looked into the alternatives, compared stuff which is not necessarily on the spec sheets, and then decided that the iPad best fits their needs best?

      But feel free to rant on some tech site just because you're butt-hurt that geeks are no longer the main target of computer manufacturers and many of those non-geeks happen to like the iPad.

      (and yes, I do realise the irony of having a go at you for ranting...)

      1. Geoff Campbell

        OK, I'll bite too....


        Well, yes, that thought did cross my mind, as it happens. And once I stopped laughing and wiped the spittle off of the screen, I went back to my previous assumption that the first wave of buyers are almost all the same cash-rich fashion-led mostly young buyers who bought the first wave of iPhones.

        And that's fine, no problem. But let's wait and see how the second wave develops before proclaiming on the success/failure/otherwise of the iPad, shall we? I don't believe the iPhone really moved out of that niche in any significant fashion, I have no idea whether or not the iPad will manage it.


        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          how long will it last?

          Yes, this is a good point. We'll need the initial crowd of fanbois to clear before we truly see whether this product will fly. My guess is that it will have a couple of months in the sun as people go through the "woo!" stage. After that the realisation will dawn that it is indeed just a big ipod touch, the lack of flash will start to grate on those using it for web browsing, and finally it'll end up in the back of a cupboard, relegated to a kind of "Sinclair C5" curiosity status. I wonder if the bookies'll give me odds on this?

        2. Big-nosed Pengie


          The post is required, and must contain letters.

        3. Alex Johnson 1
          Jobs Halo

          Tedious Nay-Sayers

          @ Geoff: Whether you "believe" the iPhone moved out of a niche you have defined - which is nonsense, by the way - that isn't borne out by the sales figures, unless by "significant fashion" you mean, "as ubiquitous as Mao's Little Red Book in the Cultural Revolution." The iPhone beat all sales expectations and has continued to do so relentlessly. This is not an opinion. You're also right - something newer and better than the iPad could come along. However, right now this is a wildly successful product launch by any possible metric, other than yours of course. We all get that you don't want one. Me, I am "cash rich" and I can afford one. It is really the perfect size to read: not just the canard of books, but magazines, newspapers, regular websites, and email. It, and devices like it, are clearly the future of how many people will consume media, particularly the written word, in the leisure and travelling time. They will get thinner, lighter, and presumably screen sizes will vary. But the hoopla about the launches around the world suggests very strongly that they won't be going away anytime soon.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Has it ever crossed your mind that an iPad buyer may actually..

        .. be mental and need some help?

      3. JEDIDIAH

        Ultimate expression of the willfully ignorant consumer.

        > Has it ever crossed your mind that an iPad buyer may actually have considered

        Yup. I quickly dismissed the idea that the iPad buyer "considered" anything.

        They just aren't that sort of consumer.

      4. Doug Glass

        Re: 1. Own a tiny ... smaller is obviously better

        That true for your body parts too?


    The Twitter Effect

    That's all very well and good but I can assure you that as an avid Twitterer, TV has become a social experience hence the need to be plugged into a laptop all night!

    See what I mean for yourself during Britain's Got Talent by following these couple of Twitterers - @AngryBritain and @TVKev

    TV will never be the same - trust me!

    1. Seanmon

      A combination of

      Britain's got Talent AND Twitter? F*cking hold me back.

    2. Tom 38 Silver badge

      The twatter effect

      Pull those twatters at random did you? Oh no, one of them looks like you...

      Bet you were gutted Big Brother was canceled eh?

      1. Paul RND*1000

        They cancelled Big Brother?

        YEE-EEESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D *fist-pump* THERE IS A GOD!!!

        Now get rid of the other ten dozen useless "reality" shows it spawned and we'll be onto something.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Social experience

      "TV has become a social experience "

      That's odd - for me its a social experience too. I sit down in front of a TV and watch it with my friends. But I guess you don't have any of those.

  3. Pete 2

    It's a badge, not an appliance

    Just like in the 70's the height of cool was to have a couple of Led Zep[1]. albums under your arm. You may never get to play them, but the mere fact that you had them said something about you. So it is with this gizmo. It says "I am at the foreski^H^H^front of technology. I have a lot of spare money. I value pretty design." The hope is (as in the 70's) that people of a like mind will come up and be your friend, maybe even offer you a puff of whatever they were smoking.

    So it is today. It's more a thing that says "look at me", rather than just quietly getting on with doing the job. That's all fine, but I bet they have a laptop squirreled away somewhere, too.

    [1] or 'Floyd, or Moodies

  4. Jimmy Floyd
    Paris Hilton

    Since you ask...

    "So what is the iPad for?"

    It's for proving the old adage about a fool and his money.

    Paris, being she provides eye-candy and precious little else.

    1. Anonymous Coward

      The thing is Pedro...

      that Apple products generally DO let you get on with what you are doing unhindered. What is this disdain for things being well designed aesthetically? It's beyond fucking ridiculous. Are you suggesting that there is no merit is design? Why shouldn't an item be pleasing to hold, to look at? Must all technology be ugly? I do wish you IT types would accept that you, contrary to you own beliefs, DO NOT know all about everything, and adjust you opinion and missives accordingly. Believe it or not designing things is actually quite hard, certainly not something anybody can do. It's an extremely important part of a products lifecycle because it involve HOW the device will function, HOW it will be manufactured and HOW much it will cost. The last part is interesting, the cheaper the materials and components are, the bigger and more lasting impact the device has environmentally, but hey, what do I know...

      And who are people like you? Soporific and supercilious nerds, boring us with list of 'features' that your preferred doohickey has, however poorly conceived and implemented they are and grumping judgementally as to how others choose to spend *THEIR* money on?

      1. Trevor Pott o_O Gold badge


        Aesthetics are irrelevant. Functionality is king. What the person or the device looks like doesn't matter, only what he/she/it can do and how much time/money/etc. it costs to do it.

        When you grow out of judging books by their cover, you not become more efficient at damned near everything, but you meet some interesting and frankly outstanding people as well.

        Is something or someone that is pretty a bad thing? Not at all…it’s simply not relevant. If I have two objects to choose from /of equal functionality, cost and resource consumption/ then why not choose the pretty one? Until something is completely and utterly commoditised however, aesthetics are just not a consideration. I know for some folks it's really hard to understand...but there honestly is a huge percentage of the population that believes and lives by the concept that design just doesn't matter.

        Life’s to short to get bogged down with pointlessly snubbing people or tools because of how they look.

      2. Big-nosed Pengie


        There's nothing wrong with aesthetic design. Nothing whatsoever.

        The problem here is functionality, not aesthetics.

  5. Eponymous Cowherd

    Why indeed....

    ***Talking to a few people who've been using them for a week or two the killer application, beyond any other, is web surfing while watching TV. Sadly it seems that the quality of our television is now so low that without additional entertainment viewers just become bored."***

    Surely a bog-standard notebook / netbook will do this just as well and, by virtue of its hinged screen, can sit on your lap with the screen orientated to the optimum viewing angle, leaving your hands free for operating the TV / STB remote controls.

    Can *anyone* suggest a valid use for the iPad that cannot be accomplished easier with a smartphone and/or netbook? This is a serious question, they certainly look very cool, but I cannot think of a single use I'd put one to.

  6. Stefing

    Reg readers

    Mainly too independent and smart to fall for Apple's keyboardless netbook.

    Oh go on, prove me wrong!

    1. Ed Blackshaw Silver badge

      I would imagine

      That they would be better for playing table tennis with than a laptop. I expect you can even get a rubberised cover for them, which would allow you to impart some spin onto the ball.

      Joke Alert. Or is it? I can't decide.

    2. Kevin Bailey

      There's a huge, enourmous benefit in saving time...

      ...specifically, *my* time.

      Say my non-techie friend/mum/aged aunt etc want to read the interweb and emails.

      If they get a laptop then I have to fix it forever (for tea and biscuits at most).

      If they get an iPad then I won't have to fix it ever.

      That's why my friend will be banging on the Apple store door 0800 tomorrow. He wants to read websites and his hotmail and I said to him to wait until the iPad was out.

      As much as the MS fanbois hate it I would say that Jobs/Apple has got it right again.

      Still, it looks like Balmer is taking over WinMo - so good exciting things should be coming out soon.

      1. Eponymous Cowherd
        Thumb Down


        ***"If they get an iPad then I won't have to fix it ever."***

        Because it is perfect, and if you can't do it, you don't need it?

        Aunt Edith: "I can't see the videos on the BBC News website".

        Kevin: "That's because they use Flash".

        Aunt Edith: "Can you install it"?

        Kevin: "Errm, no".

        Aunt Edith: "Why not"?

        Kevin: "Because Apple won't allow it".

        Aunt Edith: "Can I have one of those netbook things. Edna's got one and she can see the videos".

        ***"Still, it looks like Balmer is taking over WinMo - so good exciting things should be coming out soon."***

        Chairs, mostly.

        1. Kevin Bailey

          Fair enough point....

          ... but it still doesn't use up my time.

          Can't watch Flash - then you can't watch flash.

          And if you want the same as Edna then that's fine - as long as Edna's there to help you work it.

          Also, the netbook would have to be Ubuntu (or at least non-Windows). My 70-year0old mum uses an old laptop running Ubuntu which I've set to load her gmail on boot up - and again support has never been needed. If she gets stuck then she turns it off and then then boots it again to get back to her gmail account.

      2. JEDIDIAH


        > If they get an iPad then I won't have to fix it ever.

        The old classic: MacOS and Linux don't exist. The worst Windows based experience you could possibly come up with is the only thing that is possible for PCs. Never mind the fact that the iPad is essentially a Mac with a different shell and a locked down version of Ubuntu's package manager.

        Plus you will still need a PC to manage that iPad. Chances are it will be a Windows PC. All of the anti-PC propaganda will help make sure that doesn't change.

        1. Anonymous Coward

          RE: JEDIDIAH


          I can only speak from experience but the worst WIndows based experience *is* Windows itself. Just about every other OS is/was better than Windows in its time. Amiga OS, Risc OS and now Linux, OSX etc


          A Mac with a different shell, eh? Methinks not. An iPhone with a larger shell, perhaps. The OS is completely different. Much more different than Windows CE and Windows desktop ever were.

          1. IanPotter

            Err no

            "A Mac with a different shell, eh? Methinks not. An iPhone with a larger shell, perhaps. The OS is completely different. The OS is completely different. Much more different than Windows CE and Windows desktop ever were."

            Physically yes in that it uses an ARM based processor but it is still running a Mach kernel and a slimmed down BSD userspace even if it is hidden so it is much closer to OSX than CE ever was to Windows.

      3. Doug Glass

        If you spend your life ....

        ... saving time you'll die having accomplished nothing. Wise men, and women, SPEND 100% of their time but do so in ways the benefit themselves and hopefully others.

        Saving is good only when it puts money in the bank and makes you more money over time. Time is not to be saved; it's to be spent wisely.

    3. Richard 45


      Precisely. I use my Xperia X1 in this manner while half-watching the telly.

    4. chr0m4t1c


      I have pets who like to sit on my lap, which makes the business of using a laptop/netbook a bit awkward, particularly as they just see the keyboard as a nice place to sit.

      My laptop gets quite warm while in use, particularly the underside, so having it sat in my lap can be quite uncomfortable, especially in warmer weather.

      So device that generates less heat and can be controlled from a touch screen would be handy. Yes, my smartphone can do all of that, but the screen is a bit small for general browsing.

      I'm not sure what your problem is. Yes other devices can provide similar functionality, but why should the computing arena be different to everywhere else?

      We have compact cameras for those who just want point-and-shoot, SLRs for those who want a lot of control and bridge cameras in the middle that provide a mix of easy use and advanced features.

      We have a huge variety of cars for all sorts of uses and requirements, but I don't see anyone asking why Ford make the Focus when the Fiesta and Mondeo provide the same functionality.

      A netbook doesn't do anything a laptop can't do, but they're the right device for enough people to buy them. I don't think it's a legal requirement to have a new device provide unique functionality,

      If you can't think of a use you'd put an iPad to then I'd suggest you don't buy one.

      For me, these tablet machines replicate the functions of a handful of gadgets that I currently use and carry with me regularly, so the advantage would be in having just one device. I tried a netbook and found the form unsuitable in enough situations to make me ditch it.

      1. matt 115

        RE: Well...

        If the heat is your main problem , you could save yourself £299 and buy a tray :)

        Spring an extra 5 and get a special laptop one

    5. Alex Johnson 1
      Jobs Halo

      You Miss The Point

      @Eponymous Cowherd: No, there's nothing you can't do with a phone and laptop. But this is such a stupid argument. Why buy an umbrella if you have a coat with a hood? Why buy a BMW when you could buy a Kia? And so on. The answer is the user experience. Once you start dealign with web pages with your hands - which seems like it will be just the same as the iPhone and now other smartphones but really isn't - to have that experience intermediated by a keyboard seems like the backwards step. It seems so obvious that this is how we will consume media in future I can't realy understand why there is a debate, but perhaps you have to play with one to appreciate this.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    this title intentionally left blank

    Aren't people bored of this now?

    "Company X is about to release product Y"

    reg comments: "Oh yeah? I have no use for it therefore it is shit and anyone who buys one is a complete moron"

    "Don't know why they bother, product Z from Company B is much better - I have one so I need to justify it by saying who incredibly great it is"

    "I hate Company X and everything they make is shit. However, I will not take any time to reflect on the strange fact that I *hate* a company and if I wanted to I could just not bother reading anything about them or posting comments about them. Even though time is precious to me (an argument I use to demonstrate Product Y is completely shit) I have plenty available to tell people who are not interested how much I hate Company X"

    This is getting really tiresome now. Accept the fact that there is value in it for some people and move on. Life really is too short guys.

    1. Code Monkey

      You're right

      Shame on us commentards for having opinions on new pretty-but-useless technology. Reg, you should close these fora immediately!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward


        point taken but this has been going on since January when it was announced. How many times do we have to hear the same arguments? Same thing happens with the iPhone and that's been over three years and what have we learned during this time? Some people don't like things that other people do. Whoop Whoop.

        We get that people don't like Apple or whatever company. No need to continually beat people over the head with that information.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          .....except on boards like this....

          ....which have the sole purpose of "beating people over the head" with opinions. I'm not sure you did take his point.

    2. Seanie Ryan

      clap clap

      well said sir, however, it will fall on deaf ears.

      Techy types have it built into their DNA to think that everybody in the world sees things as they do and if they dont see value in a product, then everyone else is wrong. And NOTHING can change that idea.

      The insecurity of thinking that they might have to admit that there is a piece of technology or product that they havent heard of, used or own causes utter chaos and anger in their blinkered view, resulting in picking out the flaws in a product because it is not 100% perfect with all functions that can be conceived built in.

      Ironic that the same people could never build up a business and produce the products they criticise in 100 years. No real talent. They simply dont understand the principles of business.

      So , no, they will never tire of telling everyone else they are wrong and the mindless "its crap, it doesnt suit me, so it cant suit anyone " comments will keep flowing. despite that fact that it will shape how all other manufacturers start producing their version... irrelevant.

      but i could be wrong !! ;-)

  8. Andy 115

    This is a title

    "The iPad can connect to a VGA monitor, but not to display slides from Keynote, or web pages, or anything like that. If your presentation consists of YouTube clips or iTunes-purchased films then you're OK, but the rest of us will have to carry a laptop too."

    Erm, isn't keynote about the only reason a VGA connecter is offered? I'm pretty sure that slides are displayed via VGA and speaker notes are displayed on the iPad, in such case, no laptop required?

  9. The Fuzzy Wotnot

    Cheer up you lot!

    What a bunch of Negative Nigels we all are today!

    If people wish to buy and cut-down Palm Pilot with a huge screen let them, they finance the innovation we will all pick up on later on when the semi-sensible companies like Acer and Asus bring their own Trigger Happy device.

    Let the fanbois have some fun, iron out the niggle, pay the price and we'll reap the rewards later on with cheaper and more practical designs.

    I can see this going the way of the Newton, big song and dance until everyone realises it's OK, just not quite the wonder device Lord Jobs painted it to be. That's when the Palm of it's day will step forward and do it right.

  10. Ian Halstead

    PowerPoint? Eh?

    You wouldn't run it even if you could - would you? Keynote shows up PowerPoint for the hopelessly unintuitive mess that it really is.

    Nice to see all these people who have actually tried an iPad for a reasonable period of time making valid comments that are not just based on guesswork or preconceptions.

    1. Aaron Fothergill

      Keynote works on mine

      They are. works fine on my iPad, at least connected via the component lead (vga lead is identical output). Slides go to the big(ger) screen, slide number and controls are on the iPad screen. Do your homework Reg!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Down

      *This* is the Palm of its day

      This product is the fastest consumer product to make $1M revenue. Attack it all you want, but it *is* the Palm of its day (which was the best selling consumer device at the time).

      Going the way of Newton? No way - the Newton had an unsuccessful debut, this one hasn't by a long way.



      > Nice to see all these people who have actually tried an iPad for a

      > reasonable period of time making valid comments that are not just

      > based on guesswork or preconceptions.

      Guess what the second thing done with the Gutenberg printing press was? Recipes.

      Now I like to collect web recipes. Sounds simple enough. I like to

      save them in print ready format so I have them when I want them

      again. Bookmarks would be too unweildy. A print ready file is nice

      and simple (in this case postscript, PDFs younger brother).

      So... "saving" stuff from the web is out.

      So is "printing" stuff.

      There are other things that are handy to print/save like receipts and boarding passes and such.

      So, an iPad isn't even full featured enough to be a ticketing kiosk.

      Nevermind the more "complicated" stuff like home videos in MPEG2 format or whatever strange formats you might have ripped DVDs into (like MKV).

      It really is an oversized ipod despite the fact that it looks very much like OpenStep under the hood.

      1. Anonymous Coward

        So the iPad is obviously not for you!

        Well done, you've proved using a problem (it's not really is it.) specific to you to prove that the iPad is useless for everyone. Here is a gold star! Now fuck off...

        Seriously; if the iPad is so terrible and Apple are so evil, stop reading and commenting on articles about them. If you ignore them, they might just go away. I know, I know, I'm exhibiting that crazy "out-of-the-box" type thinking that you and your ilk cannot begin to comprehend. Hell, the mere radicalness of my suggestion must be giving you a nose bleed as you read it! It's not as if you are doing the public a service here; you're pretty much preaching to the choir. As for printing; explain why bookmarks would be "unwieldy", because they seem to work for everyone else, or are you that kind of 'special'? A solution; copy 'n paste into Pages, and save it as a PDF file. Simples! I know that this is seemingly profound thinking, so you best keep your head forward to help ease the epistaxis...

      2. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

        @JEDIDIAH this case postscript, PDFs younger brother

        No. Older brother, or possibly even father.

  11. Thomas Davie


    1) You claim the iPad doesn't work as an eBook reader because it doesn't last for weeks on battery. I ask instead, why I'd want that in my house. I don't read for weeks on end, I might push 10 hours on a *really* long day with a *really* good book, but that's about the limit of reading realistically. After that, I dump it in a dock, and am done, simple. The only time I can think that you might want ultra long life is while going away on say, a camping holiday, and well, that's never been a problem for all our mp3 players for example that we'd want to last all week either.

    2) You claim that the VGA output doesn't work with keynote, which is just plain wrong.

    3) Your article actually really neatly sums up what the iPad is for, as you mention so many things you might want to do with it – it's for *everything*, it's good at all sorts of little things that you don't want to have a full size laptop about for.

  12. jason 7 Silver badge

    Why spend all that on a flawed product?

    If another firm brought out a similar product for the same price with all those obvious omissions it would have been laughed into oblivion.

    Is being 'slightly thin' really that greater an excuse for not having all those other obvious features?

    However, the Apple reality disruption bullshit field works again.

    If folks didnt buy it you'd probably get a really really good product next time. However, Apple are fully aware that any unfinished turd they put out folks will buy. And then will buy the proper version 6 months later. Rinse and repeat.

    Its a shame really.

  13. Ben Rosenthal

    "The Twitter Effect "

    smartphone already does for that, I prefer using tweetcaster to anything else I've tried so far :)

  14. Simon Grierson

    Correction: Keynote video VGA out does work

    Just to correct your criticism of Keynote presentations working with the Video Out.

    it does work,

    See the list here of apps that work with video out:

    Will this Register anti-apple anti-ipad crusade at least research facts before spouting off?

  15. Mike Hanna
    Paris Hilton

    Is it really so bad...

    ...that someone might actually want a really big iPod Touch? For the record I will NOT be getting one. (At least not a first version one). But I don't feel the need to berate those people who will get one / already have one. They may actually want a big iPod and what's wrong with that?

    Can't we all just get along!?

    Paris, because she's pretty, has very limited uses, but you know you would...

    1. sandman

      Re: is it really so bad...

      I'm with you on this one. I won't be getting one, but only because I don't have a need for it that I can see yet. I'm old enough to have lived through the MS v Apple War (round 1), the MS v Linux War and now the MS (+Linux?) v Apple War (round 2). Apart from the nutters, who actually cares, the more technology in more forms the better. I'll carry on with my MS PCs, my Linux netbook and my Apple iPod and iPhone without giving a tinkers cuss that apparently I really should be more religious about this sort of thing.

  16. Andy 70


    good for a few things.

    Mock the Week, HIGNFY, QI, Top Gear, F1 GP, Live at the apollo, and the news at breakfast.

    Sky Plus, to have those things on in the background in the rare hour or two i get at home in that time between work and sleep. while i "half arsedly" do something else.

  17. Gary Riches


    "The iPad can connect to a VGA monitor, but not to display slides from Keynote" - You _did_ actually USE an iPad before writing this article didn't you?

    Keynote works great with the VGA adaptor. It shows the notes and controls on the iPad and displays your presentation on the screen.

  18. David Edwards

    hardware v software v vapourwre

    Too much talk about what it does today, launch day. The iPad does and will do what ever people write software for it to do. Give or take a USB port or button 2 the "new" tablet form factor jobbies will live or die based on the SOFTWARE they run, right now the iPAD is too new for many Dev to get their heads around and have delivered much (although first looks are promising e.g Evernote).

    Apple have a device, imperfect though it is, that you can buy NOW. Courier is cancelled, HP Slate back to SQ1 on Palm OS (v.interesting btw), WeTab delayed and Acer/Azus aiming too close to Kindle which feels like an 80's casio computer.

    These things will make a difference once we all decide how to use them.

    1. Trevor 3
      Thumb Up

      What title?

      Well played Andy, +1 for all the shows you listed there.

      Try Outnumbered too. Seems we have similar taste.

      I'm just midly dissapointed that QI seems to come in and out of fasion, there is so long between Top Gear series, and HIGNFY and Mock the Week series arn't long enough, even when they are only news dependant.

      Just my opinion, gotta let the guys have time off or do other things haven't we?

  19. jai

    yeah i'm not going to be queuing up tomorrow....

    ....because mine is currently in the courier van on it's way to be delivered.

    i can't wait for it to arrive, because then i wouldn't have to try and balance this laptop on my arm right now as i try to type this while standing at the window looking for the delivery van to deliver my ipad

  20. Arkasha


    You're right about documentaries that repeat themselves endlessly. It's usually always the American ones. I never really knew why the did it before but your explanation makes sense. I always thought that it was just to fill time. British ones have started doing it too now. Even my 8 year old notices it (he loves any documentaries on space) and finds it annoying.

    Anyhoo: iPad! What's it good for? Absolutely nothin'!

    I had an XDA II ages ago. I could store all my presentations on it, go to a meeting at a customer site and hook it up to a projector or monitor and give my presentations directly from that. It worked with external keyboards, could edit documents on the fly, browse the web, did satnav (with external bluetooth GPS), etc, etc. All that and it fit in my pocket. I didn't take a laptop to meetings for ages. It pre-dated the original iPhone by a good 4 or 5 years.

    The iPad on the other hand is just way too big, uses too much power, and is too restrictive for my liking. Get Linux on their and I might be interested...

  21. Someone Stole My Handle!!!

    Cause & Effect?

    ** All that is aided by programming that restates itself every couple of minutes, for those whose vital tweet caused them to miss the key dialogue. Documentaries constantly reiterate and summarise, dramas labour the same points to exhaustion and even films can't be certain you're paying attention these days. **

    Or maybe they do it becuse they know that people are Twitting and Farcebooking so they have to re-iterate everything...because when people titter and farcebook they might miss something so the point has to be said again incase yu missed something while farcebook and twittering wich would cause them to maybe miss the point when they were farcebooking and.....

  22. Sean Timarco Baggaley


    Because it's a Tablet Mac.

    Sure, it's a v1.0 Tablet Mac, but it's a Tablet Mac nonetheless.

    Yes, it has a different GUI. We get it. What were you expecting? The same, tired, 40-year-old WIMP-based desktop metaphor on a touch-screen device? Microsoft tried that. They failed. Repeatedly.

    One size most emphatically does *not* fit all. Apple have proved it.

    Perhaps, instead of wanking on about Apple this, and Apple that, you could try being a f*cking journalist for once and ask why people STILL don't understand what Apple's not-so-secret sauce is: *User-led* Design.

    As opposed to the more common *technology-led* and *marketing-led* design philosophies prevalent in this industry stuffed with grunting, knuckle-dragging, user-hating imbeciles.

    1. g e

      One size?

      Surely Apple have become the one-size-fits-all (wannabe if nothing else) and must therefore promptly disappear in a puff of logic.

      Props to Douglas Adams.

    2. Geoff Campbell


      If it *was* a tablet Mac, I would think about buying one. But it isn't, not in any way. Different hardware, different OS, different apps, different UI design ethos. Just different, overall.


      1. JEDIDIAH


        The main reason that the iPad is not a "tablet Mac" is the draconian restrictions on what you can do with it. On a real Mac, it is pretty trivial to add stuff from 3rd party sources. Contrary to what the blithering fanboys want you to think, this does not compromise the system.

        Stupid apps like Microsoft Office and Internet Explorer is what compromises a system. If Microsoft had an apps store, they would have the same exact problems they always have had because they do stupid things despite the fact that they violate industry best practices and then continue to go on doing those stupid things even after negative consequences ensue.

        Being able to install a copy of Perian or Plex and browse the media shares on my MCE or MythTV box will not turn a Mac into a Windows style security nightmare. Being able to print will not turn my Mac into a security or maintenance nightmare. Neither will being able to install VLC or Firefox or a real version of Opera.

        The iPad is actually a pretty weak device. It is something that would be considered pathetically outdated and underpowered if it were a desktop or a netbook. Being a closed system that you have to jailbreak before you can install a copy of VLC on it only aggravates the situation.

        If the device were less closed I could also benchmark it pretty easily.

        1. Anonymous Coward

          RE: JEDIDIAH

          "Stupid apps like Microsoft Office and Internet Explorer is what compromises a system."

          I tend to agree with that part - it's not the case here though. Security is not the only issue, or even the main issue.

          What compromises the life-expectancy of system is having a poor user experience. Admittedly this could be caused because hacking the system is too easy but that's not always the case.

          Apple have tried to ensure that the iPad is easy to use and can be used for things that people with little computer knowledge want to do. What do they want to do? Check a few websites and read their email, that's about it.

          The iPad does those things fine.

        2. Goat Jam
          Thumb Up

          You just don't get it do you

          "If the device were less closed I could also benchmark it pretty easily."

          This comment alone demonstrates your complete and utter cluelessness regarding this iProduct.

          So, you want to benchmark the ipad do you? I find it hard to imagine why you want to do that. No, really I do. What are you going to compare your results to exactly? Oh, and the results you get, just how will they be quantified? FPS in crysis perhaps? Or maybe just good old flops? Do you think grand aunt beryl will really give a flying fuck what your ridiculous benchmarks show when she is reading emails? Or perhaps you are bemoaning the lack of multitasking because you want to see how long it takes to compile c code while you tweet and browse porn?

          Whatever. Here's a news flash for you Einstein. The ipad is not for you. It doesn't need to be. You have plenty of toys to load linux on to, and I say that as a Linux fanboy myself.

          The ipad is for folks who couldn't give a rats arse about benchmarks. The simply want something they can do shit with. You could do 1000 benchmarks proving that the ipad is the slowest device on the planet to encode a 3 min FLAC and it would make not one fucking iota of difference to it's success or failure because guess what, nobody cares!

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Jobs Halo


            I really don't get all the angst. I agree that Apple has some bad habits, which is why I'm not buying an iPad yet - the excessive closedness is one (for example, the iPad ought to be happier to handle files you want to put on it, rather than just the stuff you buy in over the Interwebs), and the predictable early adopter punishment is another (front-facing camera, ffs), but the idea behind their whole philosophy - that most people would rather not tinker under the hood of their machines, and that they will go all-out to cater to that - seems just fine to me. That seems to be what most users want. Is the average Reg reader really ignorant enough not to realise that more users aren't like the average Reg reader? Or is the average Reg reader so small-minded that they cannot tolerate any user who does not use in the same way they do?

            I also don't get this whole 'it's my device, I paid for it, I should be able to do whatever I want with it' ethic. That may be how some computing works, but that's not how consumer electronics works, and Apple are simply the computer firm that has come closest to selling computing devices as consumer electronics. I mean, if you want to put Linux on a mobile device you're not exactly short on options, are you? Is Apple's approach somehow preventing you from having a tablet that runs Linux? Is Jobs somehow impeding people who want to have a completely open tablet on which they can run whatever OS they wish? The way I see it, he's just impeding people who want to have a completely open iPad on which they can run whatever they wish. Or am I wrong? This is an honest question, by the way - so if Apple's approach does somehow prevent other people from producing anything-goes products for the opentard market, then please disabuse me of my ignorance. If, on the other hand, you are one of those people who believes that every user out there should want to run Linux and tinker with their set-up the same way you do, as though this is somehow an aesthetic argument, then please go away. I mean, come on, there must be more worthwhile things to get all morally indignant about than this.

    3. Daniel B.

      the "TV as radio" effect

      This has become very common. So much, in fact, that I'm suffering because some Latin American cable channels have ditched the English audio, instead running every single frickin' show in Spanish. Why? Because housewives just turn on the TV to "watch" programs while they do other stuff. Unless they are proficient in English, they won't understand it, so they want Spanish-dubbed programming. Never mind that Digital Cable gives you the choice to have both audio tracks; some channels like Fox Life have just dropped the English audio.

      "iPad! What's it good for? Absolutely nothin'!"

      Nice take on the "War" song!

      I'll also go for a Linux-based tablet, or even the possible WebOS pad that HP is planning. iPad's too big, too restrictive to be an option.

    4. Thomas 4



      I have reason to suspect this man does not work with users day in, day out.

    5. Daf L


      How on earth is it user-led?

      It is most definitely not technology -led I'll agree but it is almost certainly marketing-led (I'm getting a led overdose).

      Are you saying users didn't want any USB ports so that they could use their existing storage devices, keyboards and printers?

      Did users want a non-standard SIM so they can't pop in their data SIM from their phone every now and then or use an off the shelf PAYG?

      Did the Apple opinion polls say that Users did not want to have Flash and be able to watch iPlayer?

      Did the Users beg Apple to make sure that interpreted code could not be run so that their favourite browsers or apps would not be available?

      Were users so up in arms about having a HDMI output, or wireless syncing that they threatened a boycott if Apple added it?

      I think the only user who had any input in the design was Steve - what he wants goes.

  23. Rupert Stubbs

    Why queue?

    Didn't have to - arrived at lunchtime. Is very nice. Suggest that anyone wanting to slag it off does so before they actually get their hands on one...

    (Typed on my iPad)

    1. Nic 3
      Thumb Up

      As am i

      Okay had it for a few hours, love it. Sorry all.

      Typed on my iPad ;-)

  24. max allan

    Sod the pad arguments, what about the decline in TV

    So, did the distractions cause crap TV or did crap TV cause the distractions?

    Myself I blame the US TV model where you have approx 15 minutes of adverts for every 5 of programme. In that situation, regular reminders about the last 5 minutes of content are useful. But when those 2 hour long programmes move to the UK to make 30 minute programmes with only 5 minutes of adverts in the middle, you get to realise how much of most programs is spent either repeating what they just did or telling you what exciting thing is coming up in 5 minutes time.

    If they cut out all the repeating / predicting I reckon most TV programmes could be squeezed into about 5 minutes.

    If they could engage some "useful/interesting/amusing" filters, you'd probably get an entire week of TV watching done in about half an hour. Leaving plenty of hours for tweeting about how boring your life has become and wondering what do, now you aren't glued to the goggle box for 4 hours a day.

    I don't have a TV licence and since not having one have started to realise what a lot of diverse stuff you can get through in an evening. And also how quiet the world outside is when everyone isn't at work and you'd expect it to be busier with people enjoying their freedom.

  25. Mage Silver badge

    It's OK. The price and lacks are deliberate.

    There is nothing "wrong" with it, except that it's overpriced and lacks features in competition and that a later model will add.

    The existing iPhone has no features that could not have been on original. I think Apple does this deliberately.

    Why has is the 3G/HSPA not an easily replaceable module you can add? Because Apple want to resell the product.

    Similarly they won't spend 40c on adding an SD or MicroSD card slot on any product. They want to offer a range of prices according to storage. Rather than one model with adequate built in storage and a 40c slot.

  26. Anonymous Coward

    You are *no* better than me

    All these comments from people claiming to be better people than someone who likes the iPad, has bought or intends to buy the device, are so incredibly offensive. You throw around your derision over someone's consumer device attitudes and feel better about yourselves for doing so. FU. You are no better than me, I am no better than you. Just because you loathe/detest/misunderstand/whatever this product is no excuse for you to run around judging other people and intending to make yourself better because you are "smart enough not to make such a stupid decision".


    1. Code Monkey

      I'm no better than anyone else...

      ...but being "smart enough not to make such a stupid decision" counts for something.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Thumb Down

        @Code Monkey

        Only if something is *nothing*. And you just contradicted yourself - so much for your self declared "smarts".

    2. chr0m4t1c
      Thumb Up

      For future reference

      The correct term to use here is "ODFO".

      We could start a new irrational hate campaign.

      How about "The Dell tablet will be crap because it's being made by Dell, the Aldi of the technology world. Anyone who buys one is a cheapskate. (Moneytard?)".

      1. Anonymous Coward

        What's wrong with ALDI

        Don't knock ALDI ,their laptops are usually from MEDION and are pretty solid, I have had this current one for 3 years and totally battered but still works fine. I remember that I had to queue on the day I bought it because it was so well priced.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Slighty wrong


      I think you mean "any mobile product", all of the iMac and MacBook range have SD card slots now.

      It's also possible they've done it because of the security model they've adopted - everything sandboxed with file access limited to pictures and the application's own data. If you allow removable storage then it becomes much harder to police that.

      N.B. I'm referring to usage by ordinary folks, who just use the device in the way it was intended.

      Yes, the current iPhone has no features that couldn't have been in the original, but the original would have been bigger and heavier and much more expensive. They waited for the technology to advance rather than just shoving it in because it existed. What's your point?

      My PC doesn't have any features that couldn't have been in the one I had five years ago, but I would have had to pay something like £3k rather than £600, if you don't want that to happen to your technology then you should only buy stuff that's no longer being developed. Anything from HTC or Archos should do you :-)

    4. Richard 120


      You raise an inreresting philosophical point. "Better" is an opinion, opinions are subjective. A statement like "Steak tastes better than Lobster" can never be validated.

      Anyway my point is - I am better than you (and in fact better than everyone on the planet) and it's completely impossible to prove or disprove that fact.

      Never mind eh? Have a beer.

    5. SkippyBing Silver badge


      I am.

  27. Long Fei


    I tend to veer over to various flash games sites when I'm bored. I think the iPad would be a great platform for... oh, wait.

  28. Philbradley

    Quick question or two...

    How long have you played with one for? And by that, I mean, held in your hands, at your desk, or out and about, or (gasp) in front of the television? How many does El Reg have? How many of your colleagues actually use them?

  29. Anonymous Coward

    eye pad?

    hmmmmm, no.

  30. Dr. Whoosh

    worth every cent

    I bought mine on a well timed trip to the US at the begining of May, so I paid a good deal less than the UK price.

    It is an idea whose time has come. It may be that it is a big ipod touch. If that is the case, just increasing the size has made a massive difference to how can be used.

    I see it as sort of interactive book, magazine or newspaper and use it in that way. I don't use my iphone or laptop. I never used a laptop for watching films during a flight but did with the iPad.

    I actually like the fact that the OS is basic but focused on being a pleasure to use. I like the fact that it just slots into a bag like a thin book. I think it is great and was reasonable value.

    So why the naysayers? It may be that it is a computer for people who aren't that into computers.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      @Dr. Whoosh

      Thanks for some real world impressions of this device (which I want but don't have).

      Sad that people like Code Monkey (and many, many others) declare you to be an idiot for getting such joy in life from something. Makes me ill, just ignore them (as I try) and continue enjoying your new device.

      I'm not jealous, I'm not jealous! :-)

      1. Matt Piechota



        While you're right about people who flame other people's purchasing habits are morons, you're doing a *really* bad job ignoring them. :) (I kid, I kid)

        As for the iPad, it's not the device for me. I'm fine with having a laptop around to use on the couch, my phone when I'm out and about, and an actual book. My book reading style is serial monogamy so I don't need a library in my backpack. But that doesn't make me better than those that bought an iPad. Some of the 'children' here would do well to learn that.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Thumb Up


          re: doing a really bad job ignoring them.

          You're right. I try, but they keep coming at us with offensive comments and statements that sometimes I can't just let lie. I like your analysis of the device, and I appreciate your position. And you didn't have to do it while berating me for mine - that's discussion, and that's what I want, not to have to tell these children to stop misbehaving.

  31. StillNoCouch
    Paris Hilton

    Tomorrows headline ?

    "UK ISP's crippled by introduction of 14,000 bandwidth hogs"

    This is a breaking news story (well, it was but by the time this reporter's internet connection was restored, it's sort of old news now).

    Thankfully, the outage was mitigated by a plethora of frequently dropped connections among the 'new poor'.


    Paris: Because she looks so sad

  32. Anonymous Coward

    Wonderful device

    Wonderful because it's smooth and shiny. Just perfect for skipping across the local lake on a calm day. I hope it floats so I can throw it more than once. I wonder how many time I can get it to skip across the water . . .

    1. Player_16
      Thumb Up

      You have proved...

      ...that you have more money than sense!

    2. Anonymous Coward

      Re: wonderful device

      Or if you're really rich, you could get two, strap one to each foot and let a boat drag you around that lake instead, skiing on these shiny, smooth devices. That's be more interesting than skipping it across the lake (which you'd only do once). ;-)

      BTW, if you go buy two, can you buy three and throw one my way?

  33. Alex McKenna

    What was this all about?

    What a load of irrational, rambling, meaningless tripe. Thank heavens he's not in charge of creating any kind of product. I suppose he might fit in under Ballmer though...

  34. Matt 13


    just out of interest, how does the ipad deal with photos??? my iphone compresses and reduces them to impossibly small files... pinch to zoom is crud when you loose all definition!

  35. Doshu

    For sh*ts and giggles

    What if, someone had the spare cash, liked gadgets and simply fancied this one?

    You know, for shits and giggles.

    Almost everyone buys *something* that's not especially useful in their lives, but that doesn't matter, because they do it for no reason other than fun.

    Just a thought.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up


      That's almost rational reasoning, absolutely forbidden here! Shits 'n giggles is phrase I haven't heard in a long time. Shame, because it's a chuffing marvellous one.

  36. Badwolf

    Ballmers Balls

    Looking forward to the super duper iPad clone from HP / DELL running windows cos I know how brilliant it will be......

  37. Jeff Held

    Can't use an iPad to present? WRONG!

    I have the iPad 3G and the VGA adapter - I've given a keynote presentation using a pico projector through the VGA port. That keynote presentation was created in Powerpoint and imported. I also present live websites via projector. How? Well, there's an app for that too. I use mine everyday at work. I can access my email and my calendar and found out I can type on the landscape keyboard faster that I can write (and it's more legible). Perhaps the author should actually USE an iPad before pontificating how useless it is.

    - typed in Safari on my iPad!

  38. Paul

    apple make devices for those less technically literate

    apple devices (computers, tablets, phones etc) are ideal for many people, as they are designed for people who don't know anything about computers and don't *want* to know anything about them

    a minority of users are technically clueful and spend all their time jailbreaking them or hacking them to make them do things Lord Jobs didn't intend, either because they enjoy the challenge or because they secretly despise apple's policies but can't admit to not being besotted by the temple of shiny.

    whilst I myself choose devices free from lock down, I do appreciate the design (even though the design trumps functionality - the ipad's lack of SD slot is a case in point), and I also admire the skill of people who do crack the security for their tenacity but wish they would put their effort into improving community projects!!

  39. Paul

    p.s. I have tried an ipad

    we have a number in our office, as we have fanbois and also have an iPhone app. I even have an iPod Touch (2nd gen) on my desk which employer loaned me for testing said app.

    I am sure there are people who can make good use of the ipad but there are precious few times when a real laptop wouldn't be better or so much less convenient.

  40. Rolf Howarth
    Thumb Up

    One month on

    I've been playing with my iPad for about a month now, ever since I was stuck in Las Vegas because of the volcano and needed something to pass the time, so here's my perspective on the kind of people it's aimed at based on people's reactions when they use it.

    First off, its primary market is NOT geeks and gadget freaks, neither Apple fanbois, nor Linux/open source fanbois, nor Windows fanbois. Sure, they'll play with it a few minutes and rightly point out all the things it doesn't do (and isn't meant to do). Same with me. I don't use it heavily at all, and for most things I stick to my main laptop. If I wasn't actively considering writing apps for it I might not even have bought a first generation model at all.

    The sort of people who just love it, and would go out in a flash (no pun intended) and buy one tomorrow if they can afford one (and might anyway, even if they can't) are:

    - My mum, who always liked the thought of getting an iPod or iPhone but doesn't want a contract and already has a phone and for whom the screen is a bit small anyway. She absolutely adored the iPad, and spent hours just playing with Google Maps and Streetview and looking at photos.

    - The four year old daughter of some friends who were visiting, who was bored because it was raining outside but then spent a delighted hour watching Winnie-the-Pooh videos on YouTube and playing a few free games. She had no problems at all learning how to use an iPad.

    - My cleaner and her friend, who loved using it to look at some cute photos of my cat and checking their Facebook pages.

    - The professional couple next door, who both have PC laptops and Blackberries for work but aren't really into technology at all and never realised that a gadget could be such good fun.

    Sure, the people queuing on Friday will mainly be Apple fanbois, but the appeal of the iPad is far broader than that and they will undoubtedly be in very short supply over the coming months as all sorts of normal people learn about them and buy them, not because they're stupid or have more money than sense or because they're trying to impress their friends but because they decide the iPad is shiny and fun and they want one.

    1. Nev Silver badge

      So then Apple should market the iPad as...

      ... "the gadget for people who get bored in Vegas!" ?

    2. mego
      Thumb Down

      Title goes here


      Yes, because a £450 device just screams 4 year old plaything. Not like, I dunno a £200 NDS with a CycoDS or PSP device? Both can browse the internet, both can play movies, both play games.. and I daresay a 4 year old won't have any trouble using them.

      >>My cleaner and her friend, who loved using it to look at some cute photos of my cat and checking their Facebook pages.<<

      Yes, there's definitely no other device that can do the same (or, dear me, more) for less money. You couldn't, for example, do that with an iPhone or a blackberry, or an Android device.. or heck even a netbook.


      Yeah, ok. If you say so...

      Oh. And yeah I've played about with one already for a decent time; given that I'm in the US often I had one in my hands before a lot of the "pro" ipad users here. Nothing screams out as being better than a netbook; or heck even an iPhone.

  41. Graham Lockley

    @the good doctor whoosh

    >It may be that it is a computer for people who aren't that into computers.

    A very fair comment, unfortunately you could translate that into 'Fascism, a system that is for people who aren't that into voting'

    Ok its a flippant comment but ' It Just Works' invariably comes with a price, one which some people aren't prepared to pay. Jobs made a portable computer that 'just works' and Mussolini made trains that ran on time. Can't quite see Jobs hanging from a lampost anytime soon tho :D

    1. Graham Dawson


      For all my own complaints about the iPo/ad (surprisingly enough the inability to watch videos on Cracked finally drove me off the damn thing) at least nobody is forcing people to buy them and removing access to any other sort of computer device.


    2. Michael Jones

      Trains on time

      Ref Graham Lockley

      You really should pay attention to QI more, for example:

      "The Italian railway system had fallen into a rather sad state during World War I, and it did improve a good deal during the 1920s, but Mussolini was disingenuous in taking credit for the changes: much of the repair work had been performed before Mussolini and the fascists came to power in 1922. More importantly (to the claim at hand), those who actually lived in Italy during the Mussolini era have borne testimony that the Italian railway's legendary adherence to timetables was far more myth than reality."

      1. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart


        I think the comment made on QI is that Mussolini did make the trains run on time, but it was only his own personal train

  42. Prag Fest


    Man, does it ever end. Hundreds of tech reviews and all positive, they cant make enough of the damn things to keep up with demand, yet still people cant let it go.

    Sorry, you were wrong, a lot of people don't want / aren't content with netbooks. The iPad is a success, you have been so blinkered by what you know you missed the point of it completely.

    Time to deal with it and move on.

    1. Jimmy Floyd


      "Hundreds of tech reviews..." including fanboi bloggers and PR placements?

      "and all positive..." So if I find a single negative one I can call you a liar? How about ten? Twenty?

      "cant make enough of the damn things...." because the cheap Chinese workforce insist on topping themselves.

      "The iPad is a success..." On what twisted measure?

      "you missed the point..." There's a point to the infernal box?! And you know what it is? If so, do please share because - short of being a rather fetching fashion statement - the rest of us are buggered if we know what it is!

      1. Prag Fest
        Jobs Halo


        History is just repeating itself.

        Once again the visionary few are dragging the howling and mocking masses along with them. I could try and explain, but it's just too soon for someone like yourself, I don't hold it against you, its not really your fault.

        Give it a few years, once things have really changed, and then you may just see the bigger picture. Good luck.

        1. system
          Jobs Horns

          RE: well

          Yep, sorry but you need to be an OT level 3 before we can tell you how our e-meters work or what the point is.

          Be sure to buy our iMac, iPhone and iPad then bring 5 friends into the fold and you'll be on your way though.

  43. Mikey

    Whyfor there need be titles?

    Its all quite funny reading this (on my rather capable, flash-enabled N900), because its making me laugh at how venemous the anti-mac brigade are, and how rabidly defensive the macolytes can be. Its a giant TV remote capable of checking email and twitter, but cant actually make the telly change channels (even this tablet can do that, theres an app for that ;O)

    Given that its got the same underlying CPU architecture and general system design, I wonder if we can get Maemo/MeeGo running on it? That might satisfy the OSS brigade.

    1. Graham Dawson
      Thumb Up


      There us already an Android-on-iPhone project out there. I think it wad evfn reported on el reg a while back. It looks quite nifty - as long ac you don't mind loaning part of your soul to google. :)

      I might try it now I've nobbled myself a second-hand n810. It'll give me a nifty project.

  44. Carniphage

    Oh dear. Another so-called tech journalist who does not get it

    This is how locomotive engineers reviewed the airoplane.

    Please spend a week with the device before reviewing it.


    1. Anonymous Coward

      mac iFans...

      Do they just HAVE to stick "i"'s where they don't belong?

    2. Escape Velocity

      ... does not read it

      "Please spend a week with the device before reviewing it."

      Just curious, which review were reading before you accidentally posted your reply on this opinion-about-the-fervor article?

  45. Modjo30

    Wifi? where? at home then

    Yay brilliant, look at me look at me, i have the new ipad woohoo thats makes me cool,NOT!

    Hmmm so the Wifi only ones, what use are they exactly? Brilliant oh where's my wifi? ah yes at home next to my full size pc/mac, hmmmm may as well just use that then, oh no hang on,maybe i can go for a walk and stand outside someones house that has their wifi unlocked brill, ooooh i now have a 3G enabled one great i can now watch tv while one the move, oh no! buffering ,danm 3G signal gone again, FAIL

    1. Anonymous Coward


      Yay, brilliant, look at me, I'm observing people enjoying their new devices. "Hey you, you with the iDevice, yeah, you. You're an idiot. You're stupid. You just bought a stupid device that has no purpose. You dont know how stupid you are, you're so stupid that you don't realise that the device you're playing with and enjoying and finding use with has no use and no purpose other than to give me reason to berate your decisions, belittle you and demonstrate that having different ideas to me makes you stupid." Oh, I feel so much better about myself. Hey, there's a playground, I think I'll go take some children's toys away and laugh and sneer at them and call them names. That'll make me even more proud of my own worth. After that I'll visit an old folks home and go from room to room taking their teeth away from them. Yay, what a great day I have in front of me, so much joy out there for me to take. I can't wait till tomorrow!

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Why so much hate

    Interesting that all the press was and still is waiting and hoping for the Ipad to fail.

    If it was just another product from HP or Acer, no one would be trying so hard to point out its problems or inadequacies. It seems to me too many people are jealous at Apple products, vision and success. The press doesn't make products whether magical or not, so they cannot live with the fact others do. And people love it.

  47. PC1512
    Dead Vulture

    Why do it to yourselves?

    Why does the Register persist in articles like this? In a few years time, when iPads are everywhere and the very name has become the generic term for a ubiquitous class of device, passers by will be mystified by exactly what point you thought you were making here. I'm pretty flummoxed by it even now.

    No the iPad doesn't do anything that you can't do with a netbook or a smartphone, let alone a "proper" computer. Yes a netbook can technically do "more", should you have the patience and wish to use one in that way. None of this changes the fact that for its principal functions, the iPad is *nicer* to use than either. Far more versatile than an e-book reader, more comfortable for prolonged use than a smartphone, quicker and easier to pick up and use than a netbook - the question isn't why buy an iPad, but why not?

    Of course the answer for that for many people is they can't justify the cost, and that's fine. I'm one of those that *wants* one but can't say that I need one, since I have a decent phone and decent laptop already - I can't justify the price of an iPad in the middle, but then crucially I couldn't justify a netbook either - and to me the iPad makes a lot more sense than buying another smaller, fiddlier, crappier laptop to put next to the much better laptop I already own. If I wasn't so strapped for cash, and if I could convince the wife it was something we needed (and unlike a lot of over-technical gadgets I think the iPad's probably jazzy enough to catch her eye too), then I'd definitely take one, and I'm pretty sure I'd enjoy it too.

    You know, enjoyment - linked to joy - something a lot of people look for in consumer devices. Remember that?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "the question isn't why buy [product], but why not?"

      The same question popular with snake oil salesmen and the like, I dare say.

      How about this for a reason: because people like you have already fucked over the economy and the planet by buying shit they don't need with money they don't have?

      The question isn't "why use your money wisely" but "why not?".

      1. PC1512

        Well not so much

        As I said above, I haven't bought one because I can't afford it, so I'm neither "buying shit I don't need" nor spending "money I don't have".

        If I spent the money I don't have on a netbook I don't really need instead, as I'm sure many have, presumably that would praised as a "wise" purchase?

  48. YumDogfood

    For now, its just a blip of the new

    If it still has good sales and market share, oh, about a year from now, when the new product shine has worn off then call it a success. For now its a leap in the dark for Apple, given the previous failure of tablet devices in the consumer market. Time will tell, all this pro/con ranting will have no effect - but its fun for us IT types to do!

  49. adrian sietsma

    Oooh shiny

    Why do people have to add "sent from my iGadget" at the end of every comment / email ? Afraid we won't be impressed if we don't know what toys you have ?

    And why does AC hate iGadget dislikers so much ?

    It's just a new shiny toy, some people want one, others don't.

    But queue up to be an early adopter ? A bit sad if you ask me - consumerist overload, aka "My whole being is defined by my latest purchase"

    Sent from my 5 year old but still functional laptop. It's just a tool.

    1. Anonymous Coward

      Sent from my iGadget?

      The signature is a default in the mail program. The non-wankers among us go into mail settings and change it to a useful signature. But then again, I work for a Fortune 500 and get 30-40 different emails that end "Sent from my Blackberry". So they must all be Blacktards( or would that be Tardberries????) I'm not quite sure what witticism the the Apple-haters should come up with for the Blackberry users.

      Beer as it's Friday and a half-day at that!

  50. Anonymous Coward

    My iPads

    What a fantastic queue I have just been in to buy my iPads, everyone was so rich and attractive, I personally bought three wonderful iPads, I'm so happy I can hardly believe the reaction from people who have seen my iPads, everyone displaying a knowing smile and the occasional wink, the clouds just drift away and the Sun beams down on my lovely life.

  51. Anonymous Coward

    Wait what?

    Few points:

    1. Since when are Windows users considered competent hackers? Lol point and click retards. ls and dir too hard to remember?

    2. If you can't afford $500, you aren't a coder. Real coders make real money.

    3. To code for the iPhone/iPad you have to learn C, which means understanding pointers, memory allocation/deallocation and how BigO affects your algos. Coders have gotten lazy with their efficiency over the years due to fat processors and drives/controllers.

    4. Lol Windows users are considered proper hackers. Really? lol again.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward


      if i give that $500 to apple then my local might go under. then where will i spend the next $500?

  52. Doug Glass

    Those Without Lives ...

    ... will grab at any straw to save their sinking existence.

  53. mark jacobs

    Come now...

    The iPad (like its titchy brother the iPod Touch) has a major advantage over all other suggested bits of kit here - it switches on immediately and is ready to use almost immediately. The unit is beautifully designed and, in use, a lot of thought has gone into how it "feels". For these reasons, it's bound to be a success. I want one, but I would wait until version 4.0 of their new OS comes out and beds in. I want one, but I wouldn't spend that much on one. I got a first gen iPod Touch 16GB off of eBay (not recommended) for £110 and have never looked back - they are flaming brilliant. Oh, and I'm no Mac fanboi - I use PCs and have never touched a Mac. It's just that an iPhone will load web pages faster than an HTC flagship phone on the same network - no contest. It's just that I don't have to wait a couple of minutes after switching it on, in order to use it.

  54. Ed Gould
    Thumb Down

    IPAD ?

    I received my IPAD last week after watching it on FEDEX go to Hong Kong then to Thailand then to Alaska then to..... After a few issues of just getting it delivered (long story deleted to talk about the IPAD) I opened the box and took it out and was basically disappointed as I thought it would be about 50 percent larger than it really is. After I got over it I decided to look for the instruction booklet ... there wasn't one?! I looked through the box one more time and there was a *SMALL* 4 inch by 4 inch booklet. In about two paragraphs that were in font size 2 (or 3) were some printed instructions. I had to get out a magnifying glass. The instructions were at best minimal which said plug the cord in on the IPAD (small issue of which which plug to use) and plug the USB chord into the computer. OK I thought what the heck so I tried it the screen lit up and I thought good maybe it just needs to be charged and I sat it down and forgot it. I went about my business and came back to a message on my screen stating that the IPAD will only work with OS X 1.5 and higher. I went hmmm the only restriction was that I saw in the ads were MACOSX. Surprise!!!! The issue I have is that I run OS X 1.4 and I am stuck there forever because Apple dropped classic support in 1.5.

    Now I have a worthless IPAD sitting around gather dust. WHat a waste of time and money.

    1. PC1512


      So you bought an incompatible device thinking it was 50% larger than it is, despite the copious amounts of information available from Apple and elsewhere, numerous reviews, and the fact that where you are (in America) it's been available to view and play with in shops for a month or two already.

      Yeah, that's Apple's fault. Stupid Apple.

  55. Walt French

    Why, Indeed? 'Cos they do useful things that people want

    People queued up so the Reg would have something earthshaking to write about. Slow news day otherwise?

    If this is too insignificant to write about, why write about it?

    Apple seems to have come full circle from the time when they'd ousted Jobs, and priced their computers according to the monopolist's playbook… when, unfortunately, they hadn't a monopoly on an easy-to-use interface any more. Now, the Apple logo signals to consumers that they'll be much more satisfied than if they'd bought some crappy competitive product.

    Would that some other firms would think up some clever devices that aren't just the latest minor speed upgrade of last year's hard-to-use model.

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