John Boehner Changing Last Name to BAY-ner

Rep. John Boehner (R-OH) held a press conference last week to announce that he has started the process within the Ohio State court system to officially change his family name from Boehner (pronounced Boner) to BAY-ner (what he says is the correct pronunciation of his last name according to his official website). Boehner has tried unsuccessfully his entire career to convince his constituents and others that the correct pronunciation of his name is BAY-ner; however, that pronunciation has just not caught on.

Tired of the hang up calls left on his congressional office voice mail asking for Mr. Boner, Rep. Boehner was forced to take action. “Look, I’ll tell you what this is really about,” he said. “I have every intention of running for President in 2012, and I think that with people mispronouncing my name as Mr. Boner, I will not be able to demand the respect and serious consideration I will need while running a presidential campaign.”

The press conference was cut short due to uncontrollable laughter.

Author: P. Beckert


8 thoughts on “John Boehner Changing Last Name to BAY-ner

  1. Well it’s 2012, you didn’t run for president in 2012, your name is still pronounced Boner and your still a dick.

    Some things even with time never change!

  2. How has he managed to convince so many people that the “CORRECT” way is “BAY-nur”? That’s totally made up! It’s an “o” with an umlaut (it’s a German name) so it’s pronounced like “Burner” but without the “r”. If people can’t say that, then the closest in American-English would be “Bunner”. If I was a US congressman or journalist I would use the exact German pronounciation just to piss him off (and see if he still tries to tell me “it’s Bayner”)!