The Life of Bon: Bachelor Recap: The Last One

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Bachelor Recap: The Last One

Well guys it's tempting to just be done with these Bachelor recaps and move on to bigger and better things (ahem... JoJo's season!) but I feel like it is my duty as a blogger and a ridiculous reality tv fan to see this last Bachelor recap through.  So let's talk Bachelor!

First off, I think most of us could probably see the Lauren B. choice coming.  I try my hardest to avoid spoilers but Ben has been so freaking gaga over Lauren from the beginning that I was actually surprised that the choice seemed that hard to him in the end.  Also, I saw a clip of Ben (I think it was on the 20th Bachelor reunion) where Chris asked him a question about Lauren B. and Ben said, "Since the other Lauren has gone home now, I think we can all stop calling her Lauren B. and just call her Lauren, right?"  To me that was a dead giveaway because unless Lauren B. was the winner why would Ben give a hoot in hell if we all call her Lauren or Lauren B.?

Some comments/ thoughts from last night's episode:

1)  I started this at 10:30 pm because Greg had rehearsal and wanted me to wait for him.  Getting him into The Bachelor was the best/the worst decision I have ever made.  Watching with spouse = AWESOME.  Waiting three hours and staying off all social media the night of the finale = EXCRUCIATING.  #firstworldproblems

2)  Is there a requirement that all the girls wear daisy dukes?  Every shot of Lauren or Jojo has her wearing the shortest pair of jean shorts imaginable.  And the more important question- how is it comfortable to wear shorts that look like they are riding straight up your crotch?

3)  Lauren and Ben's mom hold hands while talking about Ben.  WHY?  I don't understand this.  The only person I ever hold hands with is Greg.  Sometimes June if she's lucky.  But an adult of whom there is no romantic interest?  Not likely.

4)  Ben's mom definitely liked Jojo more.  Too bad moms don't pick the girls their sons marry.  Actually...  I take that back.

5)  Ben's mom:  "It's really disturbing to me that he is in love with both of these women."  You and the rest of America, mama!  It's new frontier for all of us, trust me.

6) Lauren during her one on one time with Ben-  "I feel like he's thinking about something... and I don't really know what..."  COME ON LAUREN!  Wise up!

7)  When Jojo asks Ben what he imagines their future looks like together- who would relocate, where would they live, etc.- Ben doesn't answer.  If I didn't think already that Lauren was going to win, that one gave it away.

8)  I asked it last week and I'll ask it again- why the bathroom floor, Jojo?

9)  I have a hard time buying that when Neil Lane showed up that Ben still didn't know who he was going to choose.  So you're telling me, Ben, that meeting the two girls' families, having them meet your family, soul searching, and time spent with both girls did not help you make a decision?  BUT when you saw the ring it all suddenly became clear?

10)  While we're talking about Neil Lane, why why why WHY was he at the After the Final Rose?  Bachelor, you're trying too hard here.

11)  Jojo's dress for the finale was stunning.  I give her 10/10.  Lauren's dress I give 7/10.  (Also I read this super interesting article on the dresses for the final day.  The show provides the dress and the girls get to keep it!)

12)  Why does Ben let Jojo go on and on about how much she loves him when he knows she's going home?  Cut it off, buddy!

13)  It is uncomfortable to me how much Ben tells Jojo he loves her.  I wish he'd stop doing that.

14)  I also wish we could stop calling her Jojo and call her Joelle instead.  Unfortunately (fortunately) nobody cares what I think.

15)  Jojo going home was predictably sad, but she held it together pretty well in the limo.  Sometimes those girls just unleash buckets of tears, so I was impressed that she didn't let all of her pride totally go out the window on national tv.

16)  Ben calling Lauren's dad for permission to marry her was adorable.  Points for Ben.

17)  Ben proposing again on the After The Final Rose ceremony with the families present was kind of weird.  I didn't understand the reasoning.  I mean, how many people are proposed to in front of their families?  I get if they got married alone so he wanted to do it again with families there, but engaged... ?  Did not compute in my brain.

18)  Jojo looked like a freaking million bucks at the ATFR.  How is one person that beautiful?!?  How is it physically possible?

19)  Jojo wearing black.  Lauren wearing white.  Was this planned?  Temptress/ future bride?

20)   I thought Jojo, again, really held it together while talking with Ben.  They were both totally classy.  Chris Harrison, however, was not.  "Ben, are you still in love with Jojo?"  He's engaged you dummy!  How awkward can you make it?

21)  JOJO AS BACHELORETTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   Greg and I were literally jumping up and down screaming.  The only thing that makes me feel better about Ben choosing Lauren is this.  Such great news.  I thought going in that chances were slim (reports were going nuts that Caila was the next bachelorette) but a small sliver of me was still hoping (see last week's recap).  You know Chris Harrison and the Bachelor crew had to be so excited when the news started "breaking" that Caila was going to be the next bachelorette.  If anyone loves a good surprise, it's Bachelor peeps.

22)  But why was Caila filming in Ohio last weekend?  Possible answers a)  She was filming for something else.  Doesn't seem too likely.  b)  Bachelor producers were trying to throw the world off so filmed Caila and Caila agreed to do it because they paid were a gross amount of money.  But why such pains to throw people off on who the next bachelorette is?  c)  Bachelor producers offered the gig to Caila and up until a week ago were planning to have her be the next bachelorette but then decided last minute that Jojo would be better.  Again.  Seems unlikely as I'm sure choosing the bachelorette involves tons of paperwork, contracts, agreements, time, etc.  Not something you just change your mind on and announce in a week.  And why choose Caila in the first place when it seemed pretty obvious that Jojo was much more a favorite.

23)  WHY THE PASTOR?  Again, Bachelor, you're trying too hard.

24)  I will admit that Ben and Lauren are cute together and seem very happy.  Boring beautiful people like Lauren deserve happiness, so I say go for it.  I still think that Ben's a little too good for her (alot of people think Ben himself is very boring.  I don't think he is, necessarily, I think he just matches the people around him.  I always thought he was a lot of fun when he was around more energetic personalities like Jubilee and Jojo.)

25)  May 23 is the Bachelorette premiere.  Count down is on!!!

26)  My dream job is legit to work as a producer on the bachelor/ bachelorette.  Travel the world, eat good food, be involved in the weirdest process known to reality tv.  What a life!

I stayed up way too late writing this post and am disgusted at myself because I have to wake up bright and early to go teach.   What'd you all think of the finale/ ATFR?  Are you all as excited as I am about Jojo's season?

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