The fundamental secret of success, as you saw in the previous article in this Secret of Success series, is your choice of what to be.

Every time is different. There's no one answer or even a right answer to this crucial question. It's always: What am I this time? (I am, you are and he is form part of the verb: to be.)

Another Secret of Success
Here's a further secret of success: You can choose what to be in advance, rather than just as a response to the situation. Yet one of the most common reasons for unhappiness is choosing what to be as a reaction to what has happened.

Decide that you are going to listen to your partner and hear them out, no matter what they say, rather than reacting angrily. The result is a more amicable, more productive discussion. Such a decision, whether in advance or in the moment, can change your life.

Choose Consciously
The choice of what to be this time is often made unconsciously, rather than consciously. Yet choosing to become aware of your choice, rather than reacting unconsciously in the situation, is part of this secret of success.

It's tough to be successful when you're not aware of what's happening. Choices are better made consciously rather than subconsciously!

How does improving your awareness change your life? The more aware you are, the easier it is to make conscious choices. Become more aware and notice what's happening, then consciously choose what to be this time.

What do you Choose This Time?
You can choose to be anything. Supportive or obstructive. Happy or unhappy. Physically fit, speedy, strong, flexible, or unfit. Single or in a relationship. Outgoing or withdrawn. Amenable or resistant. Successful or unsuccessful. Thoughtful or emotional. Each one has various degrees, it's not just either/or. There are lots of options, choose several not just one.

If the circumstances dictate what you're being, you haven't chosen. When you don't choose, you give your power away - either to the situation or to the others involved. Then someone else can manipulate you. There's no power in handing your life over to others, hoping that their choices for you will make you a success.

You need to Pay the Price
Of course, there's always a price to be paid. So your choice of what to be this time implies your willingness to pay the price. How can you expect to change your life without paying the price?

So choose both what to be this time and be willing to pay the price, no matter what it is. It may not be clear in advance, but any real choice also involves a price.

Some say you can choose to be anything at all. This secret of success is make that choice in advance of what happens, rather than as a reaction to the circumstances.

Even if you don't choose what to be in advance, awareness of this choice enables you to be more intelligent in your response. Then you are still choosing to change your life. The more intelligent your choices, the more you enjoy life.


Food for Thought

-Leon J. Sue

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