My Story, Yours Too.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

N is for Ned Flanders!


Robyn: Today, we welcome the man everybody but Homer wants as their neighbor, Mr. Ned Flanders.

Ned walks onto the stage reading the Bible. As he nears Robyn, he stops, folds over the page, closes the Book, and shakes Robyn's hand with the enthusiasm of Lindsay Lohan at Tiffany's. It is truly, truly wonderful to be here. We are all God's children, afterall.

Robyn: Nice to meet you too, Mr. Flanders. How's business at your store, the Leftorium?

Ned: Okilly-dokilly, despite the fact that nothing's RIGHT there. Get it? See, I can make jokes too. I -uh- LEFT it (hee hee) to my sons Rod and Todd so I could do this interview. Dee-dee-diddly-doo. 

Robyn: I appreciate that. Tell me, why does Homer hate you so much?

Ned: He doesn't hate me, my friend. Homer's heart is as big as the sun. Then again...He leans in and cups his hands around his mouth as if about to reveal the world's best kept secret. I admit, Marge and I have a history. One day after Maude's death by random NASCAR accident, may she rest in peace, bless her soul, -- he crosses his heart, looks up, removes a hanky from his pocket to wipe a few tears, and continues -- I needed some sugar. Marge was good for it. Wink, wink. Okilly-dokilly. Now, I must go to confession. Gotta get my daily dose of vitamin church. He gives Robyn an elbow nudge and a left-handed handshake. Wonderful to be here.

Robyn: The pleasure was all yours. Thank you, Mr. Flanders.

Designed by Rich Moore, Ned(ward) Flanders made his first appearance on The Simpsons during the show's first season in 1989. Arguably, Ned Flanders is one of the nicest guys on Tv. Who can compare?


  1. hehe you've captured his voice perfectly! I can't think of anyone nicer on tv than Ned

  2. Being left-handed, I can assure you he is not in his right mind ;0)

  3. Sugar? How did sugar help mend his broken heart? Must have been baking some cookies or something.

  4. Ned cracks me up. His best work was in the Simpsons movie.

  5. Good job -- even though I don't do the Simpson's.

  6. I like the characters you show in your posts. Love Ned Flanders. He is so annoying. Great post and full of music and visual effects.Cute.

  7. Flanders is always good for a laugh. He and Homer have a great dynamic.

  8. LOL...I don't even watch the Simpsons, but I've heard his voice before, and I was reading his parts with his voice! Something tells me I'm a little cracked here. You always have the best one-liners, though!

  9. Once more, the fact that I know this probably speaks a lot to the type of character that I am:
    I know exactly how Maude Flanders died.
    I need help.
    Okilly dokilly.

  10. Marnie, good one. ;0)

    TS, yes. Oatmeal cookies, I'm guessing. xo

    Jeanne, "so annoying." Yes! You made me laugh. Thanks. [-:

    Marlene, thanks. I'm glad you read it with his voice. I wrote it hearing his voice. We're both cracked but religiously so. xo

    Al, please explain. This inquiring mind wants to know exactly what happened at that NASCAR event. ;0)

    Thank you, friends.

  11. Maude was behind Homer. When Homer got a little overly-enthusiastic, he waved this big foam finger (I'm almost positive that's what it was), whacking her in the face. Since she was on the top row, she tumbled to her death.
    Yes, I'm a sad, sad little man.

  12. Ned is definitely always good for a laugh!!

  13. Ah ha ha! Ned and Marge, love it!
    This was great Robyn!!!!
    love ya
    gi gi