

Laurell K. Hamilton





I wrote about Trauma the Teacher on The House of Twigs.

This is a follow-up of sorts.




Let’s rewind for a minute.





They labeled me as “self-medicating”.


A druggie.



A cruel gift sometimes, but I embraced it for once.


I walked out before even seeing a Doctor.







I left that appointment so, so discouraged.

It was like my dreams just blew away in the wind.







And, it’s costly. Very, very costly.








Freedom 2


I will say:

It’s why I can’t leave my house for days on end.

It’s why I haven’t been intimate with anyone in 5 years.

It’s why I can’t be touched.

It’s why I don’t like loud noises.

It’s why my nightmares torment me.





This has quite literally changed my life.








I did it, so can you.


Don’t give up, Warrior.

Keep fighting.

LESSONS IN MAGICK: Willpower and Intuition


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Madeleine L’Engle

For the Magickally inclined Will and intuition are two paramount concepts on our path; these are not divided into RHP and LHP, they are simply part of being a Witch, and/or Occultist. When people think of Will, and Willpower in an esoteric context they immediately think of Thelema and Crowley: “Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law. Love is the law, love under will.”

But, what people don’t think too much about is how our Will translates and correlates to other areas of Magick, and life.

Essentially, our Will is part strength and part (embodied) intentions.

Our Willpower is what motivates us, fuels us, and drives us towards our goals.

Desire and lust exist in the shallow, mundane areas of our Willpower; when we begin to go deeper, and silence the chatter of the world we can hear our true Will speaking loud and clear, revealing to us secrets long forgotten and intentions waiting to come to fruition.

Willpower is endless, and limitless; only limited by how far we are willing to dive, and how hard we are willing to fight.

In the beginning of September, I read an article on WITCH about ways to strengthen Will, and use it to manifest greatness, and momentous changes into our lives.

The Author goes into great detail about how self-talk affects us and what we manifest into our lives; the difference between saying “I will” and “I am going to” are profound, and something I would not have thought of without reading their words.

It really got me thinking though; the Author goes on to state that our Will becomes stronger the more times we follow through with our word.

Your Will/stating your Will is like a promise to yourself and the Universe; when you keep that promise, it solidifies the bond and brings back to you that which you put out (think Law of Attraction).

This is how intuition works, too–

When we listen to it, and follow its advice, it becomes stronger, our connection to it becomes stronger; we become stronger.

When we ignore our intuition we feel defeated, detached and unable to decipher between anxiety and intuition based warning signs.


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Questions about how to strengthen intuition are probably some of the most common that come into my inbox, and while the answer may vary person to person based on their situation, it’s also kind of the same: listen to your gut, and don’t be scared to fuck up.

There will be times that you “listen to your gut” and it will be wrong, your gut will be wrong.

You will be wrong.

“Does this mean my intuition is broken?”

No, it means your intuition needs to be calibrated and exercised; it’s a gift we *all* have but like all gifts, those who work with and work on it the most, will see the most reward and benefit.

To this day I have moments where I listen to my intuition and it’s wrong, but I take the lesson and learn from it. I ask myself was I anxious? Was I scared? Was I simply making excuses? Was I picking up on some other energy that made me not follow through with (insert task/scenario here)?

Then there are moments where I ignore my intuition altogether; I talk about those moments all the time.

Living with anxiety, being extremely Empathic and having insecurities makes it hard for me to listen to my intuition all the time; self-doubt is a demon we all share.

Sometimes I am simply naïve, other times I am giving people the benefit of the doubt when they don’t deserve it.

There have been many times that ignoring the waves in my chest and literal feeling in my gut have burned me. I accept those moments, and own them.

You should, too.

And, you can’t fear them.

You will fuck up; which is pretty much the only true guarantee on this path.

How you handle the fuck ups determines the trajectory on your path.

Stars 2

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Then on some random day for some random reason you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach, and ignore the chatter in your brain and tune in to listen; you hear a faint whisper, a gust of wind that turns into a howl and scream; this is the day your intuition comes through for you, this is the day you step into your power.

This is the day you punch your self-doubt in the throat and become stronger than it ever was.

This is a day you will never forget.

Just like our Willpower, our intuition is limitless, endless and abysmal with its lessons of wisdom, we must be willing to tap into it and overcome the fear of being wrong, and failing occasionally.

For there are lessons to be had in every wrong and failure we encounter; Willpower and intuition are the greatest teachers.

Learn to trust them more than you doubt them, and you have the keys to Magick.