1.  If my toddler is gonna end up in my bed every night then why at least can’t I end up with her upper half snuggled against me rather than her feet kicking me in the head?
  2. Why when I tell my toddler that it’s time to leave the house to run errands or pick up her brothers from school does she suddenly feel the need to go and hide on me?
  3. How is it that my children have the hygiene habits of wild animals – I mean how hard is it to brush one’s teeth?
  4. How is it that I can ruin my kids day just by saying good morning?
  5. He leaves his dirty clothes on the floor next to our bed and empty green tea bottles on his bedside table but has the audacity to comment when the house is messy – apparently my husband likes to live dangerously.
  6. When did my idea of living on the wild side become taking my almost potty-trained toddler out in public in big girl underwear?
  7. How is it that it takes me a whole day to clean the house and about 5 minutes for my kids to trash it?
  8. Why is it that my kids want nothing to do with me until I get on the phone or go into the bathroom?
  9. When did I become the “step-and-fetch-it mom?”
  10. Why can’t I ever sit in a chair by myself – why does someone always need to crawl all over me?
  11. How is it that my toddler has more wardrobe changes that a runway model?
  12. Why, just when I am seconds from falling asleep does my toddler decide that that would be the perfect time to ask for a glass of milk?
  13. Why has my husband yet to figure out that a little help from him would make me a lot less of a crazy person?
  14. Would it be so wrong to just vanish for the day and let them all sort it out?