epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Charmed 2x18&2x19+Arrow 1x12-1x14+Tiny Pretty Things 1x02 Reviewed 🩰🏹🩰🏹🩰🏹🩰🏹🩰🏹👎

Don't Look Back In Anger

A billionaire boyfriend is the big bad? The sisters non-dead father spews platitudes. Harry had comedy amnesia and showed his personality and common accent. WTF is The Faction? This was particularly nasty. Eric Balfour and Leonard Roberts guest starred. This is not for serious fans of the genre.

This ep is worse than ever and one is not wildly enthusiastic. Mel, Maggie and Macy have fancy styled hair and nothing is uneasy. People get undone. Leonard Roberts was Macy's dad. Maggie is dumb. This show is never to be interesting. This show never had a heyday. Jordan's selfish and self centred. There are endless flashbacks and she's jealous of Mel. This was not strong and Maggie whines. There are tirelessly boring flashbacks. Julian (Balfour) is sad.

Best Lines:

“Knows what we are and where we are.”

“The handsome billionaire's always the bad guy.”

“So wrong about so many things.”

“Might have to save the world again.”

Unsafe Space

There are magic detectors? Harry and Macy get it on. The characters are useless. The sisters realise Julian was lying about underground farming – like duh. Melissa McGraw is Julian's aunt! A marble is obsessed over and the bad Harry is obsessed over. Julian has reasons. There is a season 2 hook. Harry nearly gets everyone killed because of his Macy obsession. This was a lame non-event. This was utterly inept.


Thea's under arrest and on probabtion. Did TPTB forget about that? Oliver's crazy and Oliver's actions would be harmful and far reaching in their implications. He has a sustained level of escalation. Thea has no redeeming social value whatsoever. Thea faces consequences. Moira and Oliver at shocked at the idea. Oliver plans more terrible retribution. This was not an intellectual endeavour.

Oliver and Thea burn with resentment. There are more endless island flashbacks. Oliver looks up old flame Mckenna Hall to take advantage of her. There is exposition and Lance looks unwashed and angry. Did Laurel ever find out that Tommy saw her whoring it up with Oliver? Laurel badmouths her 'dead' sister. Oliver uses Thea's case as a way to creep on Laurel. Katie Cassidy can't act. This was extremely dull and absurd. The island was miserable and dreadful. This was trivial. Oliver trips whilst shirtless. Oliver lies. There is a crisis situation. This was not compelling or intriguing. There is ill will.

Best Lines:

“Whoever you fear! Fear me more!”

“You really have a low opinion of me.”


On the island, Oliver meets Slade Wilson. Laurel lies to Tommy to run around with the vigilante. Manu Bennett and David Anders guest star. Cyrus Vanch launches an underworld power grab. Oliver and Laurel do Tommy an absolute disservice and are absolute disgraces. Lance has rage eruptions. There is no nuanced reasons and no moral courage. Laurel is a raving hypocrite. One has little expecation of Laurel and she meets it everytime. Oliver does his laughable tough guy voice. Oliver is lunatic.

Laurel rants to Tommy about how she was dryhumping the hood. Laurel has no apology for lying to Tommy. Oliver is a stupefyingly bad friend to Tommy. Oliver is joyless. Oliver is obviously trying to break Tommy and Laurel up so he can screw Laurel – and it would work and get Tommy killed. Oliver and Laurel are scum.

Oliver has terrible purpose and Laurel has no security and gets attacked. Laurel is a horrible bimbo. Moira and Malcolm intone about the undertaking. It is ridiculous how grown men get hysterical over the anorexic twit Laurel. Why doesn't Tommy have a key to Laurel's apartment? God she is such a bitch. Oliver is a self righteous ass. Shut up Oliver, he's unpleasant.

Oliver is a senselessly vicious bully who makes threats and is a lunatic. Oliver has gloating madness and is aggressive and irrational. This was silly. Laurel has will-ness and is a bitch and she deserved to die and be replaced by her Earth2 counterpart and have nobody care. Laurel doens't recognise Oliver in his vigilante getup in front of her. She's too busy trying to hump him. Oliver was stupid and confronts his mommy.

Best Lines:

“Lie to my face.”

“Cannot take the airstrip alone.”

“Make the usual threats.”

“That crazy person.”

“Only threat is bordeom.”

The Odyssey

Oliver's mommy doesn't know him and shoots him. Why is she Moira Queen? Didn't she take Walter's name? Moira plays the victim and Oliver has more considerable disquiet about the suspicious cirumstances around his mommy. Now Felicity is in the know. Doesn't the parking lot have CCTV? Diggle's a tool. Oliver has his shirt off whilst dying. Slade trained Oliver and nobody can see Slade's busted plane?

Slade has 2 sons at his point. He mentions Joe. Felicity somehow upgrades Oliver's It. Oliver rang Laurel from the island and didn't ask for help. Ring Tommy, he could have helped. Oliver is unsavoury. Oliver decided for more self-actualisation in his life on the island. Oliver's plans all go horribly awry. This was ineffectual. Fyers is boring. Oliver sulks and makes ultimatiums. The island is godforsaken. Fyers has a boss.

Best Lines:

“You're bleeding.”

“I don't need to be told that.”

“How did you survive here for 6 months? I know girl scouts who have more fight in them.”

“Threaten him with my stick?!?”

“Jam this in my face.”

“Notebook you use to fight crime.”

“Challenge code.”

“Hurts me. In my soul.”

“Human piece of garbage.”

“I guess I didn't die. Again.”

“You mother just shot you.”

“There are wolves here?”

“Worst place on Earth.”

“Turned his back on me without even thinking twice about it.”

“The one book I read in college.”

“Nobody worthy of saving.”

“I'm handling it.”

“Handle it better.”

“I'm impressed. You didn't puke.”

“I swallowed it.”

Range Of Motion

There is darker territory and amoral trypes. Who is June? Dancers welfare is casually disregarded. This was done with psedo-seriousness and is unremarkable. Nefarious types linger. The school has turbulent dynamics. Lower your expectations. And then, when you think they're low enough, lower them again. This was beyond credible.

There is no positive impact. The cop worries. There is no fair play or decency. Actors have a very narrow range. There is negative energy. Nobody delights in dance. Instead they are insidious and make bad decisions and are glamorously malevolent. There is exposition and sexism. This was so earnest.

This was not entirely convincing. There is friction. Teachers are cantankerous. Visibly well heeled types don't eat. Dancers are moodily taciturn. There are senseless acts of aggression and Ramon wants to do a Jack The Ripper ballet. There are eating disorders and fake accents and a perv and Bette screams for painkillers in the middle of a restarant.

Why is Ramon wearing a vest while in a business meeting? Cassie is in a coma and people gaze soulfully and there is a love traingle and adverse actions. Shane is not liked and Oren ate a roll, angrily. There is such bad acting and stupidity and ludicrous plotting. Yet it is oddly watchable. This was disappointing and there are damaging consequences.

Best Lines:

“Pevert's gotta perv.”

“It's nice to see how you inspire the next generation.”

“It is French, it is another language.”

“Your hips small.”

“Future worthy of this family.”

“Something wrong in there.”

“Flew smack onto the street.”

“Walk where Ramon?”

“Lipstick on a psychopath.”

Tags: arrow, heroes, review, valemont

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