General Goals In Couples Work

Goals for Couples

1.    Learn and use a structured communication model with strict rules about speaking and listening.

2.    Learn and correct mistakes related to speaking, including judgment focus, generalizing, blaming, criticizing, mind reading and ambushing.

3.    Learn and correct the mistakes related to listening, including defensiveness, personalizing, maintaining a negative filter, ambushing, criticism, contempt and reactivity.

4.    Learn and understand the impact of facial expressions, tone of voice, body language and other non-verbal cues in effective communication.

5.    Learn the importance of accepting responsibility for self-care and self-soothing. (We are all responsible for ourselves.)

6.    Learn to use the Cognitive Restructuring written tool and other Cognitive Therapy methods found in the Smart Recovery Tools and Homework website ( to correct distortions and errors in thinking and communication, both in and out of session.

7. Develop a plan for financial planning, including engaging a financial planner.

8. Gain a good understanding of the brain research to guide communication, problem- solving, and health.

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