Hawks Bobcats Basketball"PLAYOFFS!!!"

Worst of the Last Night of the Regular Season in Pictures:

64324976"HEY GIRL. HOW YOU DOIN'?"

Pistons 76ers BasketballThis is the look of despair, AKA losing to the Pistons

Hornets Mavericks Basketball"Chandler, with the right hook! Down goes Paul! Down goes Paul!!"

Nets Bulls BasketballSomething we've all missed: a facepalming Nyets player

Rockets Timberwolves BasketballTimberwolves fans are so sad, they can't even be bothered to find a paper bag that doesn't have writing all over it

Lakers Kings BasketballHell yeah, little buddy

Nationally Televised Saturday Games:
Pacers at Bulls, ESPN, 1pm (Series tied 0-0): According to Joakim Noah, "It's the playoffs, dude. It doesn't get more exciting than this." I beg to differ. Pretty much anything is more exciting than a 1-versus-8 seed series this lopsided. Have you seen the Pacers play?

76ers at Heat, ABC, 3:30pm (Series tied 0-0): Sixers forward Thaddeus Young said "The whole [Heat] team is good. They don't have that record because of just three guys." Um, actually, yeah. They do have that record because of just three guys. Have you seen the rest of the Heat play?

Hawks at Magic, ESPN, 7pm (Series tied 0-0): If I had to pick two teams to define the mediocrity of the Eastern Conference, I would unquestionably choose the Hawks and the Magic. How appropriate they get to play each other right off the bat!

Frail Blazers at Mavericks, ESPN, 9:30pm (Series tied 0-0): Both of these organizations have a rich history... of early playoff flame-outs. Which team will earn the right to get their asses handed to them in the second round???

* * *

Nationally Televised Sunday Games:
Grizzlies at Spurs, TNT, 1pm (Series tied 0-0): Z-Bo leading a scrappy Memphis team into the playoffs, and people claiming they actually might give the Spurs all they can handle. If you put money down on that in Vegas three years ago, can I be your best friend? (Because you'd be filthy rich considering those odds, you see)

Hornets at Lakers, ABC, 3:30pm (Series tied 0-0): No David West, Chris Paul playing with one-and-a-half knees... I don't even feel like coming up with something witty to say about this series. It just sucks.

Knicks at Celtics, TNT, 7pm (Series tied 0-0): Just remember, fellow Celtics fans: this starting five has never been beaten when healthy as well! (Yes, I'm aware they haven't played with this starting five yet in the playoffs -- that was the joke.)

Nuggets at Thunder, TNT, 9:30pm (Series tied 0-0): Now here is a nice test of the Ewing Theory. This also is a legitimately super-exciting series I believe. Woooooo playoffs!

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Blogger TeamD said...
"This is the best I've felt since last year," Jermaine O'Neal said after Friday's practice. "I feel good. I feel strong. I feel lean. I'm excited. You don't get this opportunity often.

Bets anyone? I bet he gets drained within the next 2 games.

Anonymous Pistoletti said...
D. Rose so far with his best D. Wade impersonation from the 2006 playoffs.

End of 3rd quater.

Blogger Dan B. said...
Anyone wanna volunteer to go throw some cold water on the Bulls so they wake up?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Does anyone else just get dirty thoughts when JB keeps talking about Drose and "finishing" all game?

Blogger Dan B. said...
Come on Boozer. Are you really going to just let Tyler Hansbrough shoot jumpers all over you the entire second half?

Blogger Dan B. said...
Derrick Rose. Wow.

Anonymous balazs said...
there should be a word for the phenomenon where 8th seeds almost win the first game of the first round, appearing worthy opponents but then getting swept anyway.

Blogger stephanie g said...
That was a distillation of the Pacers season. Scrappy, tough, and no idea how to close a game. Too bad they went away from Roy. Now the Rose hype train is gonna really go out of control.

Blogger Gökhan said...
man we just let bulls get away. we fought till the end and couldn't finish. i don't care how this series will end i'm proud of my pacers.

Anonymous James said...
Someone go screenshot ESPN's front page before the following changes:

Top Headline: Wade, Heat fight back Pacer's rally.

This is right above: Bulls erase late deficit, thwart Pacers.

Yes, the Pacers are already 0-2 on the first day of the Playoffs.

Blogger Unknown said...
The Pacers did something a Hoosier can be proud of?


Anonymous kazam92 said...
Jon Barry's dickriding of Rose was astoundingly blatant and sickening

That said, wow he was amazing

Blogger Jason D said...
First of all, holy crap Derrick Rose is amazing. This was one of the few Bulls games I've been able to watch this year and wow, dude is just awesome.

However, it's painfully obvious that the team relies way to much on him. I know he's delivered more than expected until now, but how will he hold up against tougher competition? The Bulls need someone else to step up big time (Deng? Possibly. Boozer? Doubtful).

Also, the Hawks are just destroying the Magic midway at the end of the 3rd, and Howard is the only guy that seems to give a crap or is actually trying. If the Magic lose this series, here's hoping that Otis Smith trades him for Bynum! (Pipe dream, I know).

And the Heat beat the Sixers? No shit.

Blogger Wormboy said...
Egad, people on Orlando not not Dwight or Jameer sucked.

And I just saw Chandler make a big block against the backboard. Well, there's something Erick Dampier never did.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Blogger TeamD said...
"Shaquille O'Neal failed a conditioning test this morning, and has been ruled out indefinitely by the Boston Celtics. "

Shocking... LOL
O'neils are dead

Anonymous AK Dave said...
Dirk might need a backbrace if he has to carry his team for the rest of the series like he did last night.

Anonymous TransINSANO said...
Anonymous - "John Amaechi is cool."

Not really, it actually is NBAPA protocol to appeal all fines. He knows that, or maybe it just got lost in that mess. What's interesting to me is if the NBA its own bylaws and fined Kobe double what they're technically allowed for such outbursts:


The NBA certainly violated the sacred laws of basketball today. Talk about home court advantage; if the home team is going to get a 3 to 1 free throw advantage in every first round series, why bother playing the games? I was happy to see Dallas assigned the win though. I hope the Lakers enjoy the same treatment tomorrow, though somehow I don't think the refs are going to be blowing anything around Kobe Bryant for a while.

Blogger winnetou said...
That Roy wouldn't be nearly the same guy as the years before would have been easy to predict before the Blazers@Mavs opener, but to have Jason Kidd lead the team in scoring for most of the night (until Dirk finally made a few shots)? Shocking.
In the event of a Mavs loss, I might have added some ref complaints.

Blogger Wormboy said...
God, I hate ESPN. Front page picture? Miami's win, of course, with LeBron and the Boshmallow gently touching palms. Felatio ensues. Wouldn't you think that Atlanta's sound beating of Orlando was bigger news? Wankers.

Blogger Murcy said...
balazs, are you hungarian, it would be nice to know that there are other hungarian bawful readers out there. in other news: what the hell did the magic do. seriously.

Blogger TeamD said...
I am romanian, close enough LOL

Refs were simply turrible, the Mavs got a whistle practicly on every contant Dirk's shirt had with one of the Blazers, it was so obvious they are biased, 5 STUPID STUPID calls, unimaginably stupid calls in favor of the Mavs in the last 4 min of the game, it crushes any team and we know how delicate the Frail Blazers are.... Aldridge and Camby played great D on the german shepard, he bricked a dozen before he hit some.

Anonymous Karc said...
@Wormboy - The Playoffs link on the NBA page at ESPN will automatically redirect to the Miami-Philly series.

Never mind the actual stories of today, such as Dwight Howard and Dirk carrying their teams, the Lakers and Spurs starting their games, or even the Knicks-Celtics game (which would be the redirect if the game was on ESPN and not on TNT).

Look, ESPN is in bed with the NBA because they created all of the press with the Heat. Fine. But don't whack people over the head with it. At least try to have a modicum of restraint. The Heat were yesterday. There are eight other teams playing today.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Oh lighten up Wormy. No one gives a flying fuck about the Hawks even if they beat Orlando.

Anonymous Karc said...
Lakers in white on ABC. They have no shot to win, playoffs or not.

Anonymous TransINSANO said...
Lakers must be waiting for the 2nd round of the playoffs to start.

Blogger LotharBot said...
The San Antonio Sterns got 47 fta in a home playoff game. They also had 5 more steals, 6 fewer turnovers, a +2 rebounding differential (+6 on offense)... and lost. Because they allowed the Grizz to shoot 55% from the field and 60% from three, and gave them 33 fta of their own.

Tony Parker and George Hill both pulled Dantleys. Parker got 12 of his 20 points from free throws; Hill got 11 of his 15 from the stripe as well.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
anyone catch Kevin McHale refer to Matt Bonner as "the red rocket" near the end of the Spurs Grizzlies game? Def one for the unintentional dirty quote.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Zach Fucking Randolph!

Blogger Dan B. said...
So apparently Chris Paul sandbagged the entire regular season so we'd forget that he's really fucking good.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
@kazam, yeah John Barry is one of those "company men" ESPN employs, can always be counted on to trumpet the latest hype.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
Anon - Matt Bonner is the Red Rocket, he is also Coach B (part 2), he is also The Sandwich Hunter, and if you didn't click the first link, The Medium Fundamental (via Tim Duncan).

Matt Bonner fucking rules.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
I was kinda expecting spurs to lose with ginobili being out and all... but really lakers? really?

in other news: jermaine plays like an amputated zombie. kristic is kristic. shaq is dead. celtics are so fucked.

Blogger Wormboy said...
Celtics took til the middle of the 3rd to realize they need to play playoff basketball. Spurred by ... Jermaine the Drain. Dear God, it's the bizarro playoffs.

Kazam: Oh, I hear you. Nut they could at least put a picture from a good game. Sigh.

Blogger Wormboy said...
PS Is it only me, or did Jordan just time travel from the set of the Road Warrior?

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Fuck Jermaine O'neal with the sharpest, rustiest, longest rake that exists. That piece of fucking shit wants to shoot 20% for us last year, not making a single fucking jumpshot, and he goes 6-6 against the Knicks. Making, you know, an IMPACT as the teams 6th or 7th best player when he couldn't as a teams 2nd best player last year. Fuck him.

/end profanity-laden rant

Blogger LotharBot said...
Thunder's strategy this game: play bad and let the refs win it for them.

After one quarter: Nuggets getting what they want inside and getting open looks from 3. Thunder taking mostly midrange jumpers. But the Thunder have shot 13 free throws on 10 Nuggets fouls, including quite a few that looked an awful lot like bailouts. Nuggets have one free throw from a def 3, and 1 Thunder foul, despite a fair bit of contact around the rim. Nuggets still up 9.

Blogger stephanie g said...
This blog is about tearing down and not building up, but I don't care: CP3 is an absolute dreamboat. I'd bowl with him all day.

Z-Bo being relevant in the playoffs...am I in an alternate universe?

Memphis and NO winning makes me all the sadder that Indiana gagged so badly.

I'd rather listen to a Reggie/Doris team than Jon Barry.

Blogger LotharBot said...


Anonymous Bing said...
Can someone please tell Pau and Mr Kardashian that the time to "flick the switch" has come. Fuckers.

In other news, Ray Allen is a bad man.

Anonymous AK Dave said...
Hold the fucking phone.

AARON GRAY went 5-5 and was +25 in 20min of PT. And, uh, he got... 1... rebound. But still: whodathunkit? This is a guy the Bulls had no use for a few years back.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
I have some mild qualms, but there has been almost nothing bawful about this weekend's playoffs. Fantastic.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
but there has been almost nothing bawful about this weekend's playoffs

Uh, what?

3 inexplicable underdogs winning, 4 unravelling of potential upsets, and 1 kinda good game at the end. There was plenty enough bawful to write two posts tomorrow.

Blogger LotharBot said...
> there has been almost nothing bawful about this weekend's playoffs

Nuggets missing 4 free throws on one possession.









Blogger Ragib said...
I wonder why they never reviewed the OKC bucket that Serge tipped in while holding the net with less than 2 minutes to go. That completely changed the course of the game, Denver was down 1 instead of up 1 so the strategy changes quite a lot. George Karl was pleading the refs to review it, don't know why it wasn't done.

Also, you would think Melos elbow hit Pierce with the force of a truck, the way Pierces body flopped around while Melo was just trying to secure position for the pass. But, what do you expect? Sigh.

Blogger Unknown said...
Bucks: Fear the Deer

Grizzlies: Beware the Bear?

Blogger Murcy said...
@AnacondaHL re: underdogs and potential upsets: how are the Spurs and Lakers losing bawful? it's rather something to be cherished :) (okay, I know, Basketbawful IS about bawful play, and there was plenty of that from these teams. still, let me have my fun)

Blogger Paul said...

I don't know about you but every single game kept me on the edge of my seat the entire weekend.
At the risk of being a little over the top I would even say that so far this year's play offs are the best in at least the last 13 years.

That said, nothing escapes Bawfu's omnipotent eye. So I'm really looking forward to tomorrow's post.

At the top of my own list though.

1. Indiana's collapse in the last three minutes of the fourth.
2. I know "The Three Stooges" the movie is in the process of being produce. I didn't know, Hedo Turkoglu, Gilbert Arenas and Jason Richardson were casting for the roles of Larry, Moe and Curly though.
3. And finally the Lakers, yeah N.O. played nearly a perfect game.
No turnovers and kept L.A. bigs away from the paint. Which reminds me... Phil Jackson and Pau Gasol, I'm asking the both of you. Which one of you guys thought it was a good idea to have Pau switch on Defense against CP3 pick and rolls?
And WTF is it with Pau spending all that time in the perimeter shooting fade-aways and spotting up from behind the fucking three point line none the less?!!!!

Yeah I'm pissed, I'm pissed that L.A. was unwilling to take advantage of their superiority, their size and their home court.
But I'll be more pissed if the Lakers don't go back to what works. So... if one of you happens to run into Phil or Pau before Tuesday game would you please kindly remind them that Pau has COMPLETELY owned N.O. inside ever since he was brought here? Thanks!

Anonymous Swayze said...
The Spurs just lost home court advantage to Zach Randolph and late game heroics from Shane Battier.

Raise your hand if you predicted that one?.... yeah thats what I thought...

Is there a chance that we actually might have a first round that will be bearable to watch?

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Popovich just owned McHale on this one

click here

Blogger TeamD said...
I believe Ibaka interference was with 4min left in the 4th.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Are we sure the Lakers traded for the right Gasol? Marc 24 pts vs Spurs, Pau 8 pts vs Hornets.

Anonymous EuroGuy said...
@Anon: I'm guessing that Buss spent last night after the game searching for his warranty slip.

Anonymous Kazam92 said...
My point is these were all great, watchable games. Of course there will be some bad play, but when has a first rd been this compelling?

Blogger Michael Hsu said...
LA always has trouble playing against fast point guards. Look at Chris Paul's splits against LA. All of his relevant stats are above his career averages. Fish and Kobe are too old to defend against decent point guards.

The question isn't why LA was so bad, but when did Chris Paul start caring. This is without a doubt his worst season and suddenly sees the poor guard defense and decides to play.