Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Game of Thrones: Second Sons and Lots of Douchebaggery Goodness

Spoiler alert:  I am caught up on GOT - aka TWO MORE EPISODES LEFT in Season 3, y'all!

Yeah Khal.  I'm about to
do your wife. Any questions?  
WHAT the F.  That Titus Pullo clone who is being totally gross and disrespectful to Khaleesi really needs to die.  HOW revolting.  His hot companion is a different story entirely.  I have a feeling he's the new Mr Dragon Lady. 

They had better NOT kill this adorable little Baratheon bastard.  He's so cute.  I can see a future for that kid as long as he avoids the lady in red and her lamb-slaughtering henchmen. 

Ooooh it speaks!!!  He is HOT!!! Titus' buddy is smokin'!  Dragon lady will soooo sleep with him.

AHHHHH!!! Sansa is so lucky she's marrying Tyrion.  She just doesn't know it.  I love how he asked if she drank wine.  He's probably going to go back to his old ways and is about to consort heavily with The Drink.  He reminds me of Arthur.  "Marry {Sansa}...and cheat with the nobody from Queens." 

I just hate you because you're younger
and cuter than me.  Prepare for misery. 
Holy crap - Cersei scares the bejesus out of me.  Anne Boleyn better watch out.  She'll eat her liver with some fava beans...and a nice Chianti.  She's pure evil...just like her son. 

OMG THE WEDDING!!  And Joffrey's giving Sansa away!  Oh this poor girl!!!  This is like Princess Bride!  Where's Wesley?!  Where's the Giant?  Where's Inego Mantoya?

Joffrey...are you being a douche, YET
again?  Why yes...I believe you are.  
OMG Joffrey you dickity douchey douchebag!!!  He pulls the step stool away and his ASSHAT of a grandfather does NOTHING!!!  And whoa - is it me or does the priest look like Elvis?  What's with the porkchop sideburns?

BB aka Baratheon Bastard.  
OH geez - the lady in red who spews black powder monsters from her loins is all "you think I'm trying to poison you??"  No, bitch, I KNOW you're trying to poison me!   BB (Baratheon Bastard )  fight her!  Keep your eyes open!!!  Are the lambs still screaming????

OH SHIT - she's derobing him.  Yikes.  this poor guy is like "WTF - I'm just trying to live life and be the BB I am."  OMG she just hates keeping her clothes on, doesn't she??

"Then you'll be fucking your own bride with a wooden cock" - greatest line of the night!  Ohhhh gramps.  You really have a way with evil, rudedog words.  

Oooh snap.  Khaleesi DOES have herself a new boy toy and he is cute!  Good thing he beheaded those assholes.  I couldn't stand one more second of Titus Pullo and his dirty mouth.  Even Orbit couldn't have saved that jackass.

WHAT was that scary assed thing that almost killed the adorable overweight kid and his babymama girlfriend???  That was one of the best scenes I've seen in a LONG time...on ANYTHING!


Anonymous said...

OMG, this was a great show even though nothing too exciting happened. BUT HELLO Mr Dragon Lady, he is hot and if Khalessi doesn't see him naked soon I am reneging my vote for her for Queen. She needs to tap that ASAP!

Can someone kill Joffery NOW! He is SO MEAN. I almost cried when he took that step and then the part about carrying the bride. Did you notice the look that he gave his 'whore' when she noticed there was no blood? LOVED IT! Hats off to Pete, he is doing an amazing job.

ok about the chubby guy and babymama, yes that was creepy but when you have a secret super powerful knife that you know works on super bad dead dudes, then why would you leave it on the ground and run away?

Seriously is there only 2 more episodes? That can't be right can it?


Purgatory Carol said...

OK first off - I am in SUCH withdrawal. I was so bummed it wasn't on Sunday! OK - so - you are soooo right. Tap that shiz PRONTO.

Joffrey makes me so sick that I canna WAIT for his demise. (I have not read the books so please don't tell me when that will - if ever - happen!)

I feel so bad for Tyrion's whore girlfriend. (WTF is her name?) She is very cool and does not deserve this at ALL.

I need a super powerful knife! That thing is awesome! And I KNOW! I was like "WHERE ARE YOU GOING??? GO BACK FOR THE KNIFE YOU DUMBASS!"