mockturtle (hellblazer06) wrote,

arresting vision

I knew it was gonna be one of those weeks. So I'm gonna try, very uncharacteristically, to keep it brief and to the point. Yeah, right, good luck with that, I hear you all groan.

This week has had me happily wallowing in my Adam-12 happy place with those Matt Bomer pics they've been posting. I didn't even know I was that much of an Adam-12 fangirl (Gage and DeSoto were my particular tipple as a wee thing) but I couldn't figure out why the sight of Officer Matty was making me that happy, until it popped into my head as I was geting off the bus at sunset that it was that particular childhood trope that I was responding to. Ah well, better go get me a box set then - grin.

Have to watch myself on the bus, too. All the new buses have that more than a 1m drop on them now and it's bloody dangerous, especially if the bus driver screams to a stop or roars off while you're trying to board/exit. That's how I busted my ankle, fyi. There was no handle to hold because it was broken/missing so I just went flying.

But back to Matt Bomer. Today was White Collar week, or at least, yesterday was White Collar day. It was a branch office day and it's become tradition, by ridiculously good timing, that instead of spending my morning enduring a miserable commute, I'm wallowing in White Collar instead.

And oh, my, oh Matty. Yes, that pandering, rather pointless scene at the end of the episode that served no other purpose, really, than to, as used to be heard in Sydney pubs in days of yore: "Garn, Matty, show us yer tits".

Not that I'm complaining, mind. Oh my, no. Equal time, all's fair, etc (especially with all those shameless bikini shots in Burn Notice), but still. But if Matt is happy to be objectified, again, who am I to complain?

The episodes? Um, yes, what were the plots again? The adoption agency one (and heavens, I'll abstain from commenting, I think I'm still bound by law), but weren't they the nicest, cuddliest, most agreeable and helpful gangsters you ever did see? Pure twaddle but it had its moments, and rarer still moments of Peter/Neal interaction but I'm mainly watching for the pretty, and it certainly had that.

The Mr Black one. Well, I did like the all black look (and I loved the flash when he pulled the weapon out of his waistband, too) and there were some nice Neal et Peter moments and I didn't even mind the new chick, though if they brought her in for Neal its another definite misfire but the chemistry with Peter - oh my, off the scale. Poor Elizabeth, banished to green screen hell while her hubby makes nice with this Scooby gang he seems to be collecting.

The actual story? Did anyone even care about the dead body, the identity theft or the stolen bonds? No, I didn't think so. And the ending seemed very truncated, but that's just me.

And I realise poor Peter has to park a hell of a lot of stuff when dealing with Neal, but the way he just brushes off several thefts, past and present, as well as Neal fudging the lie detector test, well, you'd think a Federal officer as good as Peter is supposed to be would be a bit more, I dunno, concerned. Never mind the stupid music box, if I were writing Peter, he'd have a big ol' file on Neal that he just kept adding to, every day (so poor Neal never gets his freedom?). Heh.

If I were writing Peter he'd probably have a sekrit whiteboard somewhere like Charlie Crews that he was using to plot all these little bits and pieces to help solve the large stack of unsolved but suspected cases involving a certain Mr Caffrey.

Of course, that'd give Peter a darker edge but at least it wouldn't make him Neal's idiot sidekick and he could have completely shat himself when Neal mentioned the whole whiteboard thing. Yeah, it'd make Peter have his own, anti-Neal agenda, but it'd even things up, I reckon, what with Neal running his scams on the side (when does the boy sleep?). Most importantly, it'd stop making Peter look like a sloppy eejit, because right now, the only reason I can think of for why Peter is looking the other way so much when it comes to Neal (the man is goona get a crick) is that he is wholly smitten. And he is. We all know it. I'd just like to see Peter a touch more proactive, but that ain't ever gonna happen on The Mozzie Hour. Grump and grizzle.

Poor Elizabeth. Such a Brokeback marriage. I mean, the rare times she talks to her hubby, what does he want to talk about? Neal, Neal, Neal and Neal. And also Neal. With a side order of Neal. Getting on the clue bus anytime soon, hon?

Would that were more of this alleged and falsely advertised bromance (actually on screen, that is). Mostly we just seem to get the boys being snippy with each other, but I can cope with snippy. Peter seems to find snippy works for him (he mentioned sparks), so who am I to argue?

I shan't bother with quibbles about how Neal is so rarely in the anklet these days, nor that Peter seems to even bother or care about his extracurricular activities (we'll assume everything was in that two mile radius, right?) or anything else that would normally have me wailing 'but why?' in other shows. I'm just there for the pretty, and it made me happy. Thank you.

Btw, this picture? Too cute. Looks like a lovely sunny day down at Battery Park. Sigh.

Human Target. After two troubling weeks of furrowed brow and wondering just why I wasn't getting it, I finally had my yahtzee moment with last night's episode. I actually stoppped typing and started watching - long the sign of sudden and geuine interest. Having Sean Maher in it certainly didn't hurt, but yeah, it finally clicked. Gonna have to rewatch it and pay attention to the bits at the start I was only half watching. Yay Human Target.

I think it helped that Chance was slightly out of his comfort zone (and points for the old 'You've Just Been Poisoned Plot', why, I haven't seen that since...the other week on Mannix). Points also for having a fiesty Girl Friday chick of the week and not a shrill shrew or pointless hero bait, as in other shows.

By comfort zone, I mean, Chance is such an Action Man Mary Sue that hanging from a Boeing 747 by his fingernails comes within his comfort zone, so it's kinda hard to care, but this time there were small chinks in the armour, signs of concern, actual sloppiness. Suddenly, he just got real interesting.

Spartacus? My tv viewing lately has featured a decided lack of pants (and other items of clothing, and, yes, True Blood, I am mainly looking at you). Cue MST3K's Tribute to Pants.

This is the most stilted, sub-300 piece of, oh never mind. Sparty is pretty, even all beat up, and John Hannah's Caledonian campery covers a great many sins. I must admit, I just kind watched this one, or most of it, as I was finishing off stuff I had to do that I didn't do while watching Human Target.

Branch Office day? Good, good. White Collar watched, friends caught up with, work done (there I was, coding in three different systems in three different languages and my boss doesn't trust me to staple. That said, late nights and early morning drooling instead of sleeping in made checking misbehaving code line by swimming line very tedious. All Matt Bomer's fault, as always - grin.

Still can't get my tv to work, though. I can watch tv via the dvr, but not direct from the box, and the new cable, which I finally found in a shop out in the wastelands (hooray for old analogue stock), did not help. Mutter, grumble, I do not understand why it did not work. TV go. Foxtel go. Why they not go together? I'll just keep banging the rocks together, I guess.

If it ain't one thing, eh? Nothing I like better than coming home after a long, hard day to a sudden and inexplicable blank screen. Sigh.

The course? It was okay. Word skills never go astray, though I was frustrated that the extraordinary tardiness of some individuals meant I didn't get to cover the units I really needed to cover. What amused me, and apparently annoyed everyone else, was the clash of cultures between the rather bluff Yorkshirewoman who was teaching the course (that's a tautology but for those who don't understand that those from Northern England are a direct people) and the American who kept asking questions, in her roundabout way. I loved it, but apparently it irked others. It was like watching Dalziel stare down some bimbo from The View. Joyous. All courses should be so entertaining.

Doctor Who? Missed it most of this week (and it was Human Nature last night, damn and blast), but how cool is it to come home to Dr Who on the telly? It's like that reviwer of an obvious certain age who rejoiced that The Goodies were back on the ABC and thus all was right with the world. Dr Who before tea - it's just the way it should be. It's made me happier than a truckload of whatever. Nothing shrugs off a day of being bullied than some quality time with the big blue box, as thousands if not millions would no doubt agree. Bliss. A cup of tea and a biscuit and Dr Who. Absolute bliss.

Btw, if The Family Of Blood are really just a cgi smoke effect, how come they gots a spaceship with knobs and ray guns and the like? I mean, if they don't actually have hands in their native form? I know, shut up, like those access shafts on that impossible planet that supposedly had no air yet could be accessed via a grille?

Never mind, Harry Lloyd does a cracking villain, and if I was wee and in a country that bothered with scarecrows instead of massive DNA damagiing pesticides, I think I'd be watching from behind the couch. They're a bit creepy, especially on the big tv.

I still think they're a bit heavy handed with the WWI stuff, though. Surely with all the coffins rolling off the planes, the young audience would already understand that young men die in wars. Certainly I got that with a certain war raging while I was wee. I was terrified of being conscripted when I grew up. I was four.

Sherlock news: more Sherlock! Yay! I love the ref to four footed foes. I must admit, I had been wondering about that. The Peanut Gallery, of course, insists they mean Bad Horse. Now that would be fun. Who'd I rather menance Sherlock next series? Moriarty or Bad Horse?

Friday: I still can't comment properly on the White Collar adoption episode (and it bugs me because I really take issue with it on several important points), but I will say, on an slightly unrelated note, that I find it disturbing to see actors/celebrities I wouldn't trust with a goldfish in the gossip mags parading some kid they've just bought off the internet (and I thought shoving tiny dogs into handbags was as cruel as it could get in LaLaLand). I guess some countries have more of a tradition in people trafficking than others. And that's all I'm allowed to say on the matter, bound by various acts as I am. It's more than I'm allowed to say, but it really bothers me, the wouldn't trust 'em with a goldfish ones (ie a puppy isn't just for Xmas). I can see a raft of Mommie Dearest books filling the shelves in decades to come.

And since I'm on a serious note (sorry, miserable, grumpy, hungry for sugar, tired, ill tempered, put on a dress size overnight, oh yeah, we're in the PMS Zone, run for your lives), I learnt I know someone who knows someone who knew that Dr who died in the chimney quite well, so I guess I'm gonna have to squirm uncomfortably every time they reference it for laughs in Bones or Castle - and they will. Socially awkward moment.

Then there's the guy who held up the Discovery channel. Chill, dude.

I mean, I've been plenty mad at networks/executives/showrunners, but never quite to that extent. Though, that said, there are a couple of showrunners I wouldn't mind giving a run on the ducking stool until they promise to quit with the MarySue/GaryStu/Macguffin/Annoying character/Bimbo/Arc from hell. Oh yes, indeedy.

Speaking of which, the names Kripke and Sandman being mentioned in the same breath are giving me cause to weep into my Weetbix this morning.

And last, but by no means, least, I knew the Tories getting back into power would be entertaining, but whoa, guys, slow it down with the sex scandals. Pace yourselves, please, gentlemen. It's almost daily now. One has to admire their stamina, if not their hypocrisy.

Btw, this led to a minor discussion on how unfortunate the phrase "You've never had it so good" was post Profumo and how in the hard winter of 1962/1963 Britain went from post-war austerity to the Swinging Sixties, in a matter of months. It's apparently a field ripe for theories, on how climate changes culture, with one theory positing that because everyone was snnowed in with their tv/radio which was awash with Profuma, Chatterly, the Beatles, etc that suddenly the Sixties, as we remember them, entered the public consciousness.

Hey, this is why I don't want a dishwasher, aside from the fact that I can't afford one and the plumbing would nae take it. I'd miss our winding discussions, from Profumo to where they filmed Children of The Stones, and I can't remember how we got there, but we touched on Dr Who and the League of Gentlemen. Oh yes, that's it. The Peanut Gallery was quoting, re Tory scandals, from League of Gentlemen, the line that went something like 'I just slipped on a wine gum and found myself inside the gentleman' which led to creepy English villages. There, from Profumo to Avebury, via Royston Vasey.

Speaking of creepy villages, True Blood. What a lark. Completely bonkers but I'm so hooked. Especially for any scene involving a certain Scandanavian. Btw, I really needed to know about the use of socks on the set. Oh, True Blood, don't ever change. Well, not this series, anyway. Season two left me cold, but this one I like.

Oh, Friday Fuckwits, how you confound me. I shall not get home in time for Blink today. Damn and blast. I shall have to content myself with page five of The Herald instead. (Btw, I know where the poor chap with the witch's hat stands, and I know that disrespectful act of vandalism was the work of those blasted Britpackers, it's their MO and their territory, you can tell by their spoor - the trail of vomit that daily leads up the hill).

So this week I've watched vampires, spies, thieves, cops, aliens and cowboys. My tropes, I have imprinted.

Monday: Sorry, totally meant to post this on Friday but by the time I finally got home I felt like that little wizened Dr Who homunculus, it was such a day. I got home late, put on Life on Mars and (sorry Sam), I was out like a light not ten minutes later.

Saturday had Himself online all day anxiously seeking updates from friends and colleagues in NZ, Melbourne and Adelaide and anywhere else naturally disastered. So I felt it would be tacky to kick him off just so I could perve at more Matt Bomer pics. Somehow, I managed to sit on that impulse. Until Sunday anyway but the connection was so slow (I think the hamster was on his last legs) I just gave up in disgust.

Not much more news anyway. I can now hang out washing in gale force winds, which was crazy and I seriously thought I was going to lose the old Hills Hoist a couple of times as it whirled like a dervish, but I figured I'd give it a go as I wanted several items in the wash and now I know nothing on earth will dry those socks o'mine (counted out and counted back in).

Didn't do much gardening as planned on account of the crazy weather. Ended up sorting the recycling (joy) and copying some episodes of Maverick for a friend (more genuine joy, young Roger is so purty). Saturday was rainy (yay) so aside from the ironing and some minor crap reduction (hola recycle bin) I wallowed and caught up on some Human Target. It is so MacGyver, and, I realise, with Burn Notice also, and even Mythbusters, MacGyver sure left a large footprint on the current tv landscape (btw, the other week, having a snit with the PC over the torturously slow non speeds I bounced onto the couch, arms folded and huffy, flicked on the tv and found the dalek episode of MacGyver. Some say they aren't daleks, but as far as I'm concerned if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck...).

So yes, Human Target, which I am suddenly finding weirdly addictive, and yes, I finally saw the episode where they tried to make the oh so familiar forests of British Columbia pass for some tin pot little South American country, and oh, the nostalgia. Even more alarming, it had Kris Marshall in it. He'd just vanished from UKTV, but there he was, looking older and desperate for work, in Human Target. Oh dear.

The monastery was also unintentionally amusing for using stock footage from Pushing Daisies (bwee!) and our old friend the cable car (more nostalgia).

Human Target also suffered from the whole I know every actor working in Canada, all six of them, syndrome. As in who can the bad guy be? I dunno, the guy from Stargate:Atlantis? Or maybe Dylan Neal from Blood Ties (much yowling there as in 'please don't hurt Dylan, we like Dylan, noooo....').

Speaking of Canadians, new(ish) episodes of Murdoch Mysteries showed up on telly. It gets such rubbish reviews but I love it to bits. A new production partner meant requisite scenes to be shot in Bristol (it's always Bristol, no idea why, with the co-productions) but whatever, it's silly, samey ITC-esque fun and I like the sort of steampunky version of Life on Mars, wot with Murdoch and his uptightness and weird newfangled ways of policing. This is what S3 of LOM would have been like, with the gruff old Inpector and the hero-worshipping young constable now pretty much forming formidable gatekeepers to their precious Murdoch. It's kinda cute.

He's a weirdo, but he's their weirdo, thank you very much.

There's a lot of Due South, Sherlock Holmes, Wild Wild West and Adam Adamant in its DNA, too. Yes, I like it. I was certainly looking forward to it, sat down with a cup of tea and a biscuit and bloody well enjoyed it.

That was pretty much it, aside from eight hours of Beau Maverick (that's a thorough Rogering if I do say so myself, ooo-er). Ah, Maverick, I love it so. No matter how many times I see it, I do enjoy it, and I love a good con.

Speaking of which, caught up on Leverage (I did say it was a rain day on Saturday and rain day = watch television). I love this show, too. The Rashomon episode was a hoot, especially with the pisstakes of everyone, and I didn't think they overdid it with the condescending British oilman at the end. I saw some of the interviews at the time, that was pretty spot on (but it's gonna be one of those I just don't get it moments fifty years later like on Maverick when they repeated the joke three times but, nope, still not getting it, sorry, my knowledge of 50s American culture is pretty much limited to Happy Days, alas).

And the one with Nate's Dad (btw, Ellery Queen is available for pre-order at Amazon, squee), managed to be so effing touching and effed up and wrong at the same time as Nate totally effed over his dad, and finally won his dad's respect in a creepily touching moment. The families in Leverage are so effed up, even by American tv standards. It's hilariously breathtaking.

So yes, Leverage, love it. Or, as Nate said in an oh so subtle shout out to its parent show: "I love it when a plan comes together".

And finally, because it's been over forty-eight hours since I've seen a car crash into any bins, this.

Christchurch earthquake


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Britain's 'seven social tribes' mapped

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Upstate New York

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Electric Light Orchestra founder killed by giant bale of hay

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Skarsgård 'feels insecure and ugly'

True Blood stars compete for charity

Twilight movies and vampire genre boost economy by $7bn

HUMAN TARGET Season 2 Cast Photos

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INTERVIEW w/ White Collar’s Matthew Bomer

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WhiCo screencaps

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White Collar

Tags: doctor who, leverage, murdoch mysteries, neil gaiman, roger moore, true blood, white collar

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