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Unscripted motherhood: Lesbian mothers negotiating incompletely institutionalized family relationships

In this article, I use Cherlin’s notion of incomplete institutionalization as a conceptual tool for understanding the parenting stories of 40 lesbian mothers. Using data gathered from interviews with 40 respondents, I examine these issues within a framework that acknowledges the differences among the respondents based on their trajectories to motherhood. I also address the unique difficulties they face as they negotiate their roles and relationships within their families and the extra layer of problems they experience in their interactions with social institutions, such as the law. My analysis suggests that lesbian-headed families are faced with internal dynamics that are similar to heterosexual stepfamilies, but also different, in that they encounter problems in their interactions with institutions (e.g., schools, the law) due to their incompletely institutionalized status. I present three resilience strategies employed by the respondents, including normalization tactics, second-parent adoptions, and commitment ceremonies. I close with a discussion of the study’s implications, limitations, and directions for further research.