Devil's Due ReviewMay 2, 2014 by

"OMG we're going to have a baby!"






That's it. That is the film.



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Closed Circuit ReviewMay 2, 2014 by

"It's a bit bloody late for that."








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Vampire Academy ReviewApril 27, 2014 by

"Blood is family. Blood is pain. And blood is death."

I'm sitting here writing this a mere four hours after seeing the film and I don't really know what I expected- if I expected nearly two hours of tired tropes and poor writing, couple with all around poor performances, I would be happy. If the film was well written, well acted, and a slight bit campy, it would be fine, but it just wasn't. The concept isn't original, the cast isn't original, the cast was all around shocking, although there seemed to be a complete lack of evil-ferret-stroking; his character arc was rather predictable. Every single line was just exposition after exposition, with the occasional burst of teenage sass from Rose, which was extremely irritating after a while. Quipping one liners is not necessary , especially after an hour and a half.

Every relationship felt forced, I didn't feel any connection to the characters, and  I honestly couldn't care less what happened to them; they were not believable in the slightest. I could attempt to educate you on the script, but I am not quite sure I understood it all myself. In the first five minutes alone we see a car crash, get introduced to a vampire and her half-vampire/half-human guardian, force fed the supernatural bond between the two, learn that vampires can control the four elements and are given a description as to dhampirs, Morois and Strigoi's. Whew

Zoey Deutch (looking very much like a young Rose Byrne) plays Rose Hathaway. She is a dhampir who is protecting Princess Vasilisa Dragomir (Lucy Fry) from Stigoi – an evil vampire breed created when a vampire takes a human life. Maybe more evil still are Vasilisa's classmates at the Vampire Academy who resent her return after being in the real world for the past year. It's like Mean Girls with fangs.

There is some excuse of a plot, Vasilisa is tormented by someone or someones in her school who sacrifice wolves and cats in an attempt to gather her attention. Vasilisa seems less concerned about those trying to kill her than she is about the boys in her school and her desire for acceptance. That brings a few Robert Pattinson look-a-likes into play that add nothing much else to the story than doing just enough to get us to the next DVD chapter without displaying any real character. There is also a love interest for Rose, large wolf dogs, more vampire mythology and Gabriel Byrne trying his best to ensure that he is not overlooked by next year's Razzie nominations.

True Blood, The Vampire Diaries, Twilight and Underworld, you would think someone would catch on that we've had a bit of an overload on the whole niche as of late right, right? Vampire Academy in no way helps bring vampires back into the forefront of pop culture, it reinforces the fact that someone needs to drive a stake into the genre to put it to rest. Without the enthusiasm of the young cast Vampire Academy would have been insufferable. Take note Hollywood, it's not the quantity of young adult fiction-fantasy novels you bring us, it's the quality that matters! For these reasons Vampire Academy gets a 1/10.

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Paranormal Activity:The Marked Ones ReviewApril 27, 2014 by

"What do you want from me?"

When the news of a new entry in the series came to my attention, the idea exhausted me; especially given the previous entries and their deteriorating quality. I can barely seem to remember what Paranormal 3 or 4 were about at times given the similar absurd plots. Nevertheless staying true to the reason these films are being made, and fans of real horror, like myself continue to watch them, Paranormal Activity:The Marked Ones, rewards its loyal audience with a fairly sensible connection with the previous films and characters.

In a way, the film does show some maturity, and they seem to have graduated from chicken feet on the floor and utensils/sheets flying around the place...well for the most part. Here to begin with the lead character, Jesse was given just enough footage to get the audience to like him. We begin to instantly empathize with his family and friends and unlike the previous movies, none of them are extremely annoying. The actors, all do justice to their parts, and if not extremely strong performances, are convincing enough to keep us watching.

After seeing the film late last night, I won't attempt comparing it to the other films in the franchise but it certainly did provide some chills late in the film. That being said the rest is the same old story: someone who never knows how or when to put a video camera down watches as someone else gets very slowly possessed, does an extremely half-assed job of investigation and finally gets taken over. There's a point to where screenplay writers want to give the audience what they desire when they pen a script, but to do it repeatedly for 4 additional films and leave little intrigue or freshness, the franchise should be blacklisted right out of Hollywood.

Time-travel, demon-army, and demon portals are only a few of the new absurdities that are being brought up in the franchise. The creators have said that there is an end-game, but after watching The Marked Ones, it seems we are at least 3 or 4 films away from getting our deserved conclusion. For these reasons Paranormal Activity:The Marked Ones gets a 5/10.

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REC 3:Genesis ReviewApril 27, 2014 by

"Hoy es mi día. "

On the day of the wedding of Clara and Koldo, their uncle Pepe Victor comes to the ceremony with a wounded hand that was bitten by a dog. Soon the infection turns him into a zombie and he attacks the other guests. Along the day and night, Koldo and Clara seek out each other while they witness their families turning into zombies.

If you've seen the first and second parts, you'll notice a few matching events between those previous movies and this one. It's another parallel story, not the beginning as you could read from its title "Genesis".

I'm on the fence about this movie. It's well made, well acted and, in general, not a bad movie. I liked the slow build up as it gave some time to get to know the characters and made me care about them later in the movie. I thought the action was good (although the jump scares were pretty cheap and I didn't feel genuinely scared at any point), and I didn't even mind the love story so much.

That being said, I felt like it had absolutely nothing to do with the first two REC movies and there were a lot of things that just didn't work very well.

For starters, the film started off like a found footage film, only to later abandon that in favour of filming it like a normal movie about 20 minutes in. The transition in filming styles didn't really make any sense for me, one should just choose one and stick with it. Secondly, the "comedic" elements didn't really work. It felt like the makers of the movie couldn't decide what kind of movie they wanted to do, so they did some sort of compromise. All the comedic elements did was ruin the suspense and tension making the audience stop taking it seriously.

In REC 2, we were presented with a religious connection to the virus, that the virus itself was a demon spreading itself into visible form through a sort of "infected rabies" which was a great idea that gave it a great twist. However, in REC 3, the creators butchered this idea by using religion as a form to be able to fend off the zombies by praying which in itself was a pretty horrendous idea.

All in all, I wouldn't really call the film REC 3, honestly because it takes form of both a spin-off and it's tone changed into a more parody format. Furthermore, REC 3 doesn't answer any questions conjured up back from REC 1 and 2 such as "What happened to the dog?","Who is the demon exactly and what is its purpose?". All in all, I am looking forward to getting my questions answered in REC 4 due out this October. For these reasons REC 3 gets a 5/10.

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