Quotes of the week

They said what?
'I have expressed a degree of regret that can be equated with an apology.'
Already admirers of Defence Secretary Des Browne, we were highly impressed by his nimble manipulation of the English language. Still, you do wonder if, sometimes, it might not just be easier to say sorry.

'I don't think of it as breaking down barriers. I do it for the same reason any bloke does: I love football.'
Jacqui Oatley, Match of the Day's first woman commentator. So there, all doubters.

'You cannot keep your place because you look elegant at the crease. A team of good-lookers won't win anything.'
Geoff Boycott - in typically straightforward fashion - appraises the (lack of) form of England captain Michael Vaughan.

'He's got it whatever it is and I don't, and I can't buy it.'
The very lovely actor Hugh Bonneville, here discussing his co-star Eric Cantona, does himself a disservice. 'It' seeps from him.

'I am pleased to say the authorities have decided on a number of inexpensive safety measures and they have promised me the flagpole will be fully operational.'
Bet you are all terribly relieved; after serious discussion and some input from health and safety inspectors, Jack Straw says the Union Flag will fly on Portcullis House in Westminster.

'I don't regret anything. The terrible ones I always did for the money, like Dungeons and Dragons. Christ, that was dreadful.'
Honesty and sound judgment. Hats off to Jeremy Irons.

'Jose has a contract. We won't sack him. He has the club's support.'
As Chelsea FC chief executive Peter Kenyon pronounces on the future of manager Jose 'Special One' Mourinho, so comes to an end the only 'will he, won't he?' to rival David Miliband's leadership bid.

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