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How can I keep from getting addicted to Stack Overflow?

It is time for him to take care of our live problems.

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migrated from stackoverflow.com Sep 4 '11 at 13:49

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marked as duplicate by genesis, Shadow Wizard, Sathya, Tim Post Sep 4 '11 at 14:38


Try running him under valgrind –  Paul R Sep 4 '11 at 13:48
You should speak with him –  Matteo Sep 4 '11 at 13:48
I like this question! –  Alex Farber Sep 4 '11 at 13:48
don't do it or my gf will do the same to me :D –  Davide Piras Sep 4 '11 at 13:49
Have you already got an answer from him? –  stakx Sep 4 '11 at 13:55
Seriously, get him out of the house, away from the computer. Drinks and dinner are a great start. Less clothing is also good. Nerds are human first and foremost. –  CrazyCoderz Sep 4 '11 at 13:59
I posted the link to Hacker News !!! –  JVerstry Sep 4 '11 at 14:00
@Paul: Everything runs slowly under valgrind, but maybe that's a good thing. –  dmckee Sep 4 '11 at 14:51
Explain to him that you weren't seeking an answer so much as validation. –  pohl Sep 4 '11 at 15:41
Hmmm .. not sure about the duplicate close. This is how to discourage one's LIFE PARTNER from SO addiction. So different solution is required, methinks. –  StuartLC Sep 4 '11 at 17:10
Sorry, I don't understand how this can be duplicate to the other question either. How can I not be addicted is different from how can I prevent someone else from being addicted? –  user162697 Sep 4 '11 at 17:23
When people are unwilling to address a compulsive / addictive behaviour, it's time to get a counselor (shrink/analyst) involved to find out why this is their only form of enjoyable reinforcement. Getting sexy isn't the long-term solution –  New Alexandria Sep 19 '13 at 13:04
Welcome Mrs Skeet! :) –  Tomas Nov 27 '13 at 0:36
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4 Answers

Well, your hubby is probably chasing rep, or collecting medals.

Can I recommend that you set up a reward system at home to keep him interested in RL:

  • +5 Rep for everytime he notices you've done your hair or pays you a compliment.
  • -1 Rep for everytime he answers 'yes dear' while peering into his computer without looking up.
  • etc

And not to mention badges for doing the dishes, taking out the garbage and playing with the kids.

And I'm sure that you can figure out how he can trade in all this rep for some bedroom time with you. But that's NSFW :)

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You've earned the Still Alive badge for Honey, can you fix the lights in the living room?. See your profile. –  Frédéric Hamidi Sep 4 '11 at 17:23
"... pays you a complement"? Seems that you yourself spend here too much time :-) –  Tomas Nov 27 '13 at 0:39
Right you are - I need to spend more time on english.stackexchange.com :) –  StuartLC Nov 27 '13 at 4:37
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Propose to do something "more fun" with him.

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See: Pair programming –  Tim Cooper Sep 4 '11 at 13:55
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Write a BotNet to downvote all of his contributions so that he has no incentive. If you need help to do this try StackOverflow

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You need a better botnet then. It can upvote/downvote some other things. Doesn't need to be immediately effective. Just faster than the husband is over time. –  wolfbyte Sep 4 '11 at 13:57
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If you think you have to be in charge of controlling someone else, you may want to do some enquiry into your own thinking.

Lead by example :-)

Also, voting to close (on stackoverflow).


I'm not sure if the OP meant this in jest however I'm updating my answer to be clearer on what I really think.

I'll speak about myself since I really can't know what's true for someone else.

When I find myself asking questions like "How do i stop x person from doing y" or "How can I get x person to think y thing about me", any of those kinds of thoughts, I know it's time to enquire into my own thoughts.

When I beleive the thought that anyone should be different than how they are right now I find that I treat them in a way that isn't the most loving I can be.

The lesson that I want to teach the people I love is that I love them unconditionally, that is, without any conditions. When I start acting asif they're not absolutely perfect as they are right now, that they need to change something (to make me happy), I know I'm living a lie.

What's real is that people are people, what's not real is how I imagine they "should" be and it's reality that I love, not an imaginary world of thoughts.

What it always comes down to for me is whether I'm loving myself without condition. I can project that love onto other people along with a host of other beliefs, values, thoughts, and I can act like it's them who needs to change. It's just that for me, when I'm being that way I know I'm not loving myself without condition.

I wrote a little about this recently here: http://bit.ly/qq1LPB


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Do you propose Marry should vote to close any questions her husband answers? –  Paŭlo Ebermann Sep 4 '11 at 14:07
haha no. I just voted to close the question when it was on StackOverflow :-) –  Jamie Dixon Sep 4 '11 at 14:27
I know I've been downvoted for this answer but I really think it's something quite important to realise. If the lesson you teach your partner is "I want you you to change" you're implying "you're not good enough as you are". I know from my own experience that when I teach someone else that lesson, it's time for me to enquire into my own thinking instead of acting like they're the problem. –  Jamie Dixon Sep 4 '11 at 14:28
I second Jamie Dixon. I would add that making your opinion known is important, but only once or twice. Nagging is trying to decide for someone else. If it really is impacting your lives, don't "cover for him". Let him feel the consequences of his own behavior--angry boss, dirty room, etc. –  rescdsk Sep 4 '11 at 15:03
Careful Jamie - no one has any humour here, anymore. Just check my fail post :( –  Pure.Krome Sep 4 '11 at 23:58
You start asking questions, so that he answer your question not others ;-) –  Hemanth Mysore Oct 27 '13 at 18:53
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