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Question: Why are some so-called'lifestylers' just flat out cheating?

Dear Lounge Advice,
It seems to me, looking at all the questions, that way too many of them involve someone cheating. A man looking for a 'teacher' while it sounds like his wife is clueless, two halves of different couples swinging together, without their spouses being aware, just a myriad of questions about going about the lifestyle in a sneaky way. I feel that the whole point of the lifestyle is to be free, open, and clear of the trappings of society's so called 'propriety'. So why are there so many people going about talking about being in the lifestyle, when they are really just 'cheating'

Thank you.



Dear (Anonymous),

What a fantastic question. Of all the questions for which I can produce the answer, I wish this was one of them. It infuriates me to see this, hence my sometimes attitudinal replies to people who divulge these things to me. If we're here to openly allow each other to explore sexuality, why cheat? Personally having an ex who cheated on me, even though we were in the lifestyle, adds fuel to this particular fire. Some people are never satisfied, I suppose. This is no place for deceit. Anyone who condones this kind of behavior (i.e. involves themselves with cheating swingers) should be chastised.
For those of you who are cheating despite being in the lifestyle; for those of you here without your partners' knowledge, and everyone else taking deception as your bedmate.........
You're a disgrace to the swinging community.
Harsh for a public advise columnist to say?



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