TEXT: TOP FASHION GAMES 
  1 
  STUPID FANTASY LAWS, 
  VOL. 9 
   
  Written By: 
  Dave Woodrum 
   
  Copyright 2006, Top Fashion 
  Games. 
   
  Contact: 
  Woodrumworks@yahoo.com 
  EXPLORING THE MOST WON-
  DROUSLY  STUPID AND QUITE 
  CERTAINLY 
  PERHAPS 
  THE 
  MOST OPPRESSIVE LAWS OF 
  THE LAND: 
  While murder, rape, exploitation, theft, and abuse are 
  certainly novel selections for crimes appropriately 
  punished these infractions against society are rather… 
  well, terribly bland and a bit too straight to the point. 
  So straight to the point, in fact, that any true, red 
  blooded village wracked with superstitious idealiza-
  tions should have little to fear from the threat of such 
  obvious crimes. Real villages and communities need 
  crimes rooted from pathetic inner fears. Real villages 
  need stupid, oppressive laws. 
  Based on both the superstitions of the past and the in-
  active laws still written on the books throughout the 
  real world comes Stupid Fantasy Laws, Volume 9. In 
  this role playing product you will find a dozen differ-
  ent laws that are based on the erratic judgment of rul-
  ers, the irrational fears of villagers, oppressive social 
  customs, and the unusual outcomes of very seldom 
  occurring situations.  
   
  THE SYSTEM: 
  The laws are presented in a manner that makes them 
  truly universal with most role playing products of a 
  fantasy nature. For the most part actual game statistics 
  are avoided. For fines where a currency value is set, 
  consult the below notes regarding the relative values 
  of listed currency amounts. 
  1copper= a small amount of money, equal in value to 
  the purchase of a simple torch, a very small loaf of 
  bread, or the petty offering to a beggar.  
  1silver= a staple monetary sum, equal to a poor, un-
  skilled laborer’s work for one day or a plain, simple 
  meal at a small inn. One silver coin is worth around 
  ten copper coins. 
  1gold= a sum of money mostly used by skilled crafts-
  men, merchants, and aristocrats. One gold coin is 
  worth around ten silver coins. 
  In addition to monetary fines, various forms of 
  punishment are also listed. This might range 
  from a day in the stocks to execution or exile. 
  Also provided in the notes is a section called 
  Probable Cause. This area reflects upon a possi-
  ble reason as to why the law might have been 
  established. If desired the game master should 
  feel free to develop their own reasoning for the 
  establishment of such a law 
   
  ADORNMENT OF DEMONS/DEVILS: 
  It is unlawful for any individual to be in posses-
  sion of any item that is adorned with the im-
  agery or likeness of demons, devils, imps, or 
  similar creatures. Such items may include (but 
  are certainly not limited to) clothing, weapons, 
  armor, shields, books, paintings, illustrations, 
  etc.  
  Punishment: 
  For each offending item the guilty party shall be 
  fined an amount of 1 silver coin. In addition to 
  the fine the offending item shall be taken from 
  the guilty person’s possession and destroyed. 
  Should the guilty person be found in five or 
  more offending items at a single time then the 
  guilty person shall be tied to a stake and burned 
  to death.   
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law comes from a general superstitious fear 
  of evil creatures. . 
  
  TOP FASHION GAMES 
  2 
  BATHING DURING A DROUGHT: 
  During times of a drought it is unlawful for any citi-
  zen to bathe more than once a week. Likewise, dur-
  ing such times it is unlawful for any visitor of the 
  community or governed to bathe at all.  
  Punishment: 
  Any individual found breaking this rule shall be sub-
  ject to 30 lashes with a whip and shall have a bucket 
  of dung dumped upon them.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  Despite a rather harsh method of punishment, this 
  law is actually a bit more sensible. As a drought 
  naturally reduces the abundance of water in an area, 
  conservation naturally becomes a serious issue. 
  Visitors to the governed area are generally given 
  less sense of bathing rights than the citizens. The 
  citizens are generally individuals who have no 
  choice but to claim the area suffering from the 
  drought as their homeland.  
   
  CONSULTING A PROSTITUTE: 
  It is unlawful to consult a prostitute for information.  
  Punishment: 
  Individuals guilty of this crime shall be fined a fee 
  of 2 silver coins and required to serve 1 day in the 
  stocks for each known offence.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law was originally created to protect local in-
  formation brokers. As such, it is likely to find this 
  law in cities governed by corrupt rulers.  
   
  CONSUMING EVIL CREATURES: 
  It is unlawful to consume the meat or flesh of evil 
  creatures.  
  Punishment: 
  Individuals guilty of this crime shall be fined a fee 
  of 1 gold coin and are imprisoned for 10 days.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law was originally out of superstition that con-
  suming the flesh of an evil creature (such as a 
  dragon) would turn the consumer evil as well.  
   
  GROWLING: 
  It is unlawful for any individual to make any form of 
  growling noise, even if the individual intends to do 
  little more than mock at a dog.   
  Punishment: 
  In the event of a first offence of growling the indi-
  vidual shall be fined a sum of 3 silver coins. Upon a 
  second offence the guilty party shall have one of 
  their front teeth pried out by the local torturer. 
  Should the guilty party be missing all front teeth 
  then the guilty party shall be fined a sum of 5 silver 
  coins instead. Upon the third offence of growling 
  the guilty party shall be fined a sum of 7 silver 
  coins, branded upon the forehead, and have all of 
  their remaining teeth pried out.  Should the guilty 
  party fail to learn their lesson and repeat this wrong 
  doing with a fourth offence of growling then the 
  guilty party shall be tied down and repeatedly 
  stabbed with a silver dagger until the guilty party 
  dies.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law comes from a general superstitious fear of 
  werewolves.  
   
  LAUGHING AT FUNERALS: 
  It is unlawful for any individual to laugh for any rea-
  son during a funeral ceremony.    
  Punishment: 
  For each offence the guilty party will be given 5 
  lashes with a whip and fined a sum of 2 copper 
  coins.  Individuals known to be guilty of this crime 
  for more than 3 times shall also be required to spend 
  1 day in the stocks for each additional offence.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law comes from a general requirement of re-
  spect.  
   
   
  
  TOP FASHION GAMES 
  3 
  MAGIC POUCHES AND BAGS: 
  It is unlawful to be caught in the possession of any 
  form of magical bag, pouch, purse, sack or similar 
  item of containment. Likewise it is considered 
  unlawful to attempt to cast a spell or otherwise alter 
  the properties of a bag, pouch, purse, sack or similar 
  item by magical means. 
  Punishment: 
  For each offence the guilty party shall be required to 
  pay a fine of no less than 5 gold coins. Likewise all 
  contents of the container as well as the magically 
  enhanced container shall be turned over as property 
  of the governing body. The offender shall not re-
  ceive any form of compensation for the magical 
  container or its contents. 
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law is established primarily in the interest of 
  anti-theft protection. Many magical bags, sacks, and 
  pouches tend to allow the owner to easily carry 
  around a significant amount of weight in content. 
  Such an advantage is particularly favoured amongst 
  burglars and thieves.  
   
  OILED WEAPON RESTRICTION: 
  It is against the law to use any weapon within two 
  hours of cleaning or oiling it. 
  Punishment: 
  For each offence the guilty party shall be fined a 
  sum of 5 silver coins. Members of the local guard 
  are exempt from this law.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law is established primarily in the interest of 
  protecting citizens and others from weapons treated 
  with poisons. Quite often an assassin will slip a bit 
  of toxin in their blade’s cleaning oil.  
   
  SADDLE TRADE LAW: 
  All used or new saddles must be sold to or through 
  the local leatherworker.  
  Punishment: 
  Violations of this trade law will result in a 2 gold 
  coin fine and the confiscation of the saddle.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  This law is designed to protect the interests of the 
  local leather worker.  
   
   
   
  SELLING OF DUNG: 
  It is unlawful to sell any form of dung from any 
  form of animal or monster.  
  Punishment: 
  Violations of this law will result in a 1 silver coin 
  fine.   
  Reason/Cause: 
  Originally this law was intended primarily to halt 
  the sell of fertile manure during times of plague. 
  While the law is considered to be somewhat useless 
  and obscure to many it can be brought against un-
  wanted suppliers of magical and alchemical compo-
  nents.  
   
  SELLING OF VOMIT: 
  It is unlawful to sell any form of dung from any 
  form of animal or monster. Likewise, it is unlawful 
  to sell the vomit of humans or humanoids. 
  Punishment: 
  Violations of this law will result in a 2 silver coin 
  fine.   
  Reason/Cause: 
  A similar law to the selling of dung, the selling of 
  vomit primarily targets merchants of bizarre magical 
  and alchemical components.  
   
  SELLING OF MOUNTS TO ADVENTURERS: 
  It is unlawful to sell any form of mount or beast of 
  burden, whether horse, mule, pegasi, or otherwise to 
  an individual known to follow the trade of an adven-
  turer.  
  Punishment: 
  Should such a transaction take place and the offend-
  ers are caught then the seller and buyer alike shall be 
  subject to 20 lashes with cane or whip and sentenced 
  to 30 days of imprisonment. Likewise the purchased 
  mount shall be turned over as property of the ruling 
  government.  
  Reason/Cause: 
  In areas where the economy has suffered due to rob-
  beries on the trade routes there is often the belief 
  that adventuring parties are really little more than 
  flashy dressed bandits. Limiting the sale of mounts 
  to such individuals is viewed as a means of hinder-
  ing highway robbery.  
  
SOURCE: textdata/thevault/_GM Books/World Building & Game Design/Top Fashion Games/TFG - General - Stupid Fantasy Laws 9.pdf