But I insist that they believe it of me: I have always thought very unsatisfactorily of myself and about myself, only in very rare cases, only compulsorily, always without delight in 'the subject,' ready to digress from 'myself,' and always without faith in the result, owing to an unconquerable distrust of the of self knowledge, which has led me so far as to feel a even in the idea of 'direct knowledge' which theorists allow themselves: this matter of fact is almost the most certain thing I know about myself.