Yet despite these threats, my grandfather did return, changing his name from Tumahuki to Ngarewa, and rather than being bitter or hateful he helped to build three whare karakia, three churches, on sites of huge significance where loss was incurred: Tūtahi at Taurangaika, Te Kapenga at Hukatere, and Te Ao Tawhi at Manutahi. To heal the trauma, to help find a way forward, he mobilised with Parihaka, believing in the strength of kotahitanga and maungārongo. Such was his absolute belief in building a better future. He learnt to forgive in the hope that the partnership envisioned in Te Tiriti would be realised.