children s health issues
Bullying
Children who are bullied
Children who are bullied may tell family members or friends, but they are often too embarrassed and frightened to tell teachers or other adults in a position of authority (such as coaches). Teachers are often unaware that bullying is going on. Victims of bullying may refuse to go to school, appear sad or withdrawn, or become moody. They are also at risk of self-inflicted injury, poor self-esteem, and anxiety. Many victims of bullying become bullies themselves. Children who are bullied need reassurance that bullying is always unacceptable. They can respond to the bully by Telling an adult Walking away Changing their routines to avoid the bully Attending counseling For safety reasons, victims of bullying should not directly confront the bully. Children should be taught to ignore and not be bothered by the bully, which reduces the bully's satisfaction and eventually lessens the bullying. Praising the victim's courage for reporting bullying can begin to rebuild self-esteem. If bullying occurs at school, parents should inform school officials. The parents of the child who has been bullied may or may not feel comfortable informing the bully's parents but should avoid confrontation, which could be counterproductive by making the bully's parents defensive. Victims may fear that telling the bully's parents will worsen bullying, but it often stops bullying, particularly if the discussion is positive and not accusatory, but instead is focused on the harmful behavior. The bully's parents should make it clear to their child that bullying is not acceptable. Parents should insist that the bully apologize and make amends to the victim. Doing so can help the bully learn right from wrong, can make the bully more sensitive to other children, and can make others see the bully more sympathetically. The bully's parents should watch their child closely to ensure that bullying stops. Counseling is recommended for both the child who has been bullied and for the child who is doing the bullying. Often, bullies are expressing their unmet needs or modeling the aggressive behavior of a parent or older sibling. Bullying should never be ignored. The most important thing a parent, teacher, or other adult can do when observing bullying is to address it immediately. The best way to intervene depends on the children's age and nature of the bullying as well as the adult's relationship to the children. However, whether dealing with young children or high school students, regardless of the type of bullying, adult intervention is needed. 