 I became freer and more relaxed. And I started writing that I was disappointed and I was struggling and this is hard and I don't understand what you're doing and why are you doing this? Over the last six years, my conversation, even though it still feels very one-sided to me on my end, I know that he is in it and I know that he's listening and he's working through all of that. And I've just seen such a change in the...