 Or my cross to bear is this neighbor I have. Or my cross to bear is this problem I'm facing. No, that's not your cross to bear. Here's what your cross to bear simply is. It means you die to yourself, and by dying to yourself or losing yourself, you ultimately find yourself. You go, what do you mean by die to self? Let me illustrate. Dying to self means resisting that temptation to do what everybody else does.