 And his friend says to him, you know, I'd like to learn to play football. Will you teach me how? So the man who knows, now he says, oh, sure. It's this little pointy leather ball. There's this long field. There's 100 yards. It's got some white marks on it. All you have to do is pick up the ball and run from one end of the field to the other. And if you do that enough, you win.