And I felt like if the world knew that I had this pregnancy during this time, it was going to be like, you know, I didn't even, even to terminate the pregnancy, I had to go far because I was like, I don't want people seeing, I don't want people knowing, you know, and I said it all in this book, not for the fact of like a shock factor, but to say that like, we should not put our job before our health.