 i knew that was common i knew a lot of my friends from back home were going through the same thing and that none of them liked it either i didn't quite appreciate the effect that maybe it was having on me until you know until i was older and started to look back on these things at some point as you write in your book you develop you redevelop the relationship with your biological father you went and actually lived with him for a while but that was not as pleasant an experience as you had thought it would be is that correct