 works and that she wants to be treated like a child but I want us to just be on the same page and worry about the future rather than you know the now moment and I'm trying to get us out of debt and I just feel like we're not on the same page I was wondering like yeah are there methods like kind of be like hey babe you know I'm thinking about the future yeah there are here's a personal question do you treat her like a child mm-hmm