 Ever had one of those moments when your favorite skinny jeans feel too tightly tailored? Generously apply lard to your hips and thighs and those fancy pants will slide on like a dream. Or here's a family-friendly idea. How about making your yard into a lard fun park? Frost your driveway with a nice thick coating to give those kiddos a downhill thrill no matter what time of year. Having a bad hair day? Yep, a little lump of lard can tame your flyaways in a jiffy.