 You write in the book, after a year of waiting tables, going to open casting calls and trying in vain to even meet an agent, I began to worry that I'd never, never get a job in show business. So even when you wind up in New York, there's a rebellion even in that because your father doesn't understand it and you're trying to figure out what your place is. You know what you want to do, but it's hard to communicate that.