 He's electing people, but not everyone seems like they're going to go to heaven. So did he not elect those people? And is God even really good? And what is this character that I've been telling people about and living for? And I had no idea that there was sort of maybe this side to him. And so I had to really wrestle through and think through that. And then the other piece was experiencing the problem of evil, really for the first time, despite the fact that