title: Mongoose: Populating without ref in parent
body: <p>In my node.js + mongoose application I have a parent and a child schema which have the refs of each other:</p>
  
  <pre><code>var PersonSchema = new Schema({
      name    : String
    , age     : Number
    , stories : [{ type: Schema.ObjectId, ref: 'Story' }]
  });
  
  var StorySchema = new Schema({
      _creator : { type: Schema.ObjectId, ref: 'Person' }
    , title    : String
    , fans     : [{ type: Schema.ObjectId, ref: 'Person' }]
  });
  </code></pre>
  
  <p>Now I am able to populate all stories when fetching a person by:</p>
  
  <pre><code>Person.findOne({ name: "some name"}).populate('stories').exec(...);
  </code></pre>
  
  <p>Recently I recognized that a growing array like stories in person slows down the performance for <strong>huge</strong> arrays. So I want to change that, because in my case the array is growing really fast and gets huge. My solution appeared to be easy. I changed the person schema to </p>
  
  <pre><code>var PersonSchema = new Schema({
      name    : String
    , age     : Number
  });
  </code></pre>
  
  <p>that only the StorySchema holds the ref. </p>
  
  <p>Now the question: Is there a way or workaround to populate even so the stories in my person?</p>