large/1823/stage_land_0803_librivox_64kb_mp3/stageland_14_jerome_64kb_0
large/1823/stage_land_0803_librivox_64kb_mp3/stageland_14_jerome_64kb
English
1823
The stage sailor is good to his mother and dances the hornpipe beautifully. We have never found a real sailor who could dance a hornpipe, though we have made extensive inquiries throughout the profession. We were introduced to a ship's steward who offered to do us a cellar flap for a pot of four half, but that was not what we wanted. THE STAGE SAILOR IS GOOD TO HIS MOTHER AND DANCES THE HORNPIPE BEAUTIFULLY WE HAVE NEVER FOUND A REAL SAILOR WHO COULD DANCE A HORNPIPE THOUGH WE HAVE MADE EXTENTIOUS ENQUIRIES THROUGHOUT THE PROFESSION WE WERE INTRODUCED TO A SHIP'S STEWARD WHO OFFERED TO DO US SELLER FLAP FOR A POT OF FOUR HALF BUT THAT WAS NOT WHAT WE WANTED
ot do it a bit like they do it on the stage. The stage sailor places his right hand behind him and his left in front, leaps up into the air, kicks out his leg behind in a gay and bird-like way, and the thing is done. The real sailor that we saw began by saying a bad word. Then he leaned up against a brick wall and undid his belt, pulled up his "bags" as he stood there (he never attempted to leap up into the air), tucked in his jersey, shook his legs, and walked on. It was a most unpicturesque performance to watch. The thing that the stage sailor most craves in this life is that somebody should shiver his timbers. "Shiver my timbers!" is the request he makes to every one he meets. But nobody ever does it. His chief desire with regard to the other people in the play is that they should "belay there, avast!" We do not know how this is done; but the stage sailor is a good and kindly man, and we feel convinced he would not recommend the exercise if it were not conducive to piety and health. RS UP AND THEN HE DID NOT DO IT A BIT LIKE THEY DO IT ON THE STAGE THE STAGE SAILOR PLACES HIS RIGHT HAND BEHIND HIM AND HIS LEFT IN FRONT LEAPS UP INTO THE AIR KICKS OUT HIS LEG BEHIND IN A GAY AND BIRD LIKE WAY AND THE THING IS DONE THE REAL SAILOR THAT WE SAW BEGAN BY SAYING A BAD WORD THEN HE LEANED UP AGAINST A BRICK WALL AND UNDID HIS BELT PULLED UP THE BAGS AS HE STOOD THERE HE NEVER ATTEMPTED TO LEAP UP INTO THE AIR TUCKED IN HIS JERSEY SHOOK HIS LEGS AND WALKED ON IT WAS A MOST UNPICTURESQUE PERFORMANCE TO WATCH THE THING THAT THE STAGE SAILOR MOST CRAZE IN HIS LIFE IS THAT SOMEBODY SHOULD SHIVER HIS TIMBERS SHIVER MY TIMBERS IS THE REQUEST HE MAKES TO EVERY ONE HE MEETS BUT NOBODY EVER DOES IT HIS CHIEF DESIRE WITH REGARD TO THE OTHER PEOPLE IN THE PLAY IS THAT THEY SHOULD BE LAY THERE AVAST WE DO NOT KNOW HOW THIS IS DONE BUT THE STAGE SAILOR IS A GOOD AND KINDLY MAN AND WE FEEL CONVINCED THAT HE WOULD NOT RECOMMEND THIS EXERCISE IF IT WERE NOT CONDUCTIVE TO PIETY AND HEALTH
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