large/3914/beast_in_jungle_1012_librivox_64kb_mp3/beastjungle_4_james_64kb_44
large/3914/beast_in_jungle_1012_librivox_64kb_mp3/beastjungle_4_james_64kb
English
3914
"Rather! I feel now as if I had scarce done anything else. I appear to myself to have spent my life in thinking of nothing but dreadful things. A great many of them I've at different times named to you, but there were others I couldn't name." RATHER I FEEL NOW AS IF I HAD SCARCE DONE ANYTHING ELSE I APPEAR TO MYSELF TO HAVE SPENT MY LIFE IN THINKING OF NOTHING BUT DREADFUL THINGS A GREAT MANY OF THEM I'VE AT DIFFERENT TIMES NAMED TO YOU BUT THERE WERE OTHERS I COULDN'T NAME
was to forsake him it was surely for her to take leave. This was why he didn't directly ask her again what she knew; but it was also why, approaching the matter from another side, he said to her in the course of his visit: "What do you regard as the very worst that at this time of day _can_ happen to me?" He had asked her that in the past often enough; they had, with the odd irregular rhythm of their intensities and avoidances, exchanged ideas about it and then had seen the ideas washed away by cool intervals, washed like figures traced in sea-sand. It had ever been the mark of their talk that the oldest allusions in it required but a little dismissal and reaction to come out again, sounding for the hour as new. She could thus at present meet his enquiry quite freshly and patiently. "Oh yes, I've repeatedly thought, only it always seemed to me of old that I couldn't quite make up my mind. I thought of dreadful things, between which it was difficult to choose; and so must you have done.  ITS OWN AUGUST WEIGHT IF SHE WAS TO FORSAKE HIM IT WAS SURELY FOR HER TO TAKE LEAVE THIS WAS WHY HE DIDN'T DIRECTLY ASK HER AGAIN WHAT SHE BUT IT WAS ALSO WHY APPROACHING THE MATTER FROM ANOTHER SIDE HE SAID TO HER IN THE COURSE OF HIS VISIT WHAT DO YOU REGARD AS THE VERY WORST THAT AT THIS TIME OF DAY CAN HAPPEN TO ME HE HAD ASKED HER THAT IN THE PAST OFTEN ENOUGH THEY HAD WITH THE ODD IRREGULAR RHYTHM OF THEIR INTENSITIES AND AVOIDANCES EXCHANGED IDEAS ABOUT IT AND THEN HAD SEEN THE IDEAS WASHED AWAY BY COOL INTERVALS WASHED LIKE FIGURES TRACED IN SEA SAND IT HAD EVER BEEN THE MARK OF THEIR TALK THAT THE OLDEST ALLUSIONS IN IT REQUIRED BUT A LITTLE DISMISSAL AND REACTION TO COME OUT AGAIN SOUNDING FOR THE HOUR AS NEW SHE COULD THUS AT PRESENT MEET HIS ENQUIRY QUITE FRESHLY AND PATIENTLY OH YES I'VE REPEATEDLY THOUGHT ONLY IT ALWAYS SEEMED TO ME OF OLD THAT I COULDN'T QUITE MAKE UP MY MIND I THOUGHT OF DREADFUL THINGS BETWEEN WHICH IT WAS DIFFICULT TO CHOOSE AND SO MUST YOU HAVE DONE
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