large/6923/diary_pilgrimage_1112_librivox_64kb_mp3/diaryofapilgrimage_14_jerome_64kb_25
large/6923/diary_pilgrimage_1112_librivox_64kb_mp3/diaryofapilgrimage_14_jerome_64kb
English
6923
The great delight of the sheet, as a whole, is to trip him up whenever he attempts to move, so as to hear what he says when he sits down suddenly on the stone floor; and if it can throw him into the bath again just as he has finished wiping himself, it feels that life is worth living after all. THE GREAT DELIGHT OF THE SHEET AS A WHOLE IS TO TRIP HIM UP WHENEVER HE ATTEMPTS TO MOVE SO AS TO HEAR WHAT HE SAYS WHEN HE SITS DOWN SUDDENLY ON THE STONE FLOOR AND IF IT CAN THROW HIM INTO THE BATH AGAIN JUST AS HE HAS FINISHED WIPING HIMSELF IT FEELS THAT LIFE IS WORTH LIVING AFTER ALL
hen lightly skip away from it, dry and smiling. But that is not the manner in which the dripping, untaught Briton attempts to wipe himself upon a sheet. The method he adopts is, to clutch the sheet with both hands, lean up against the wall, and rub himself with it. In trying to get the thing round to the back of him, he drops half of it into the water, and from that moment the bathroom is not big enough to enable him to get away for an instant from that wet half. When he is wiping the front of himself with the dry half, the wet half climbs round behind, and, in a spirit of offensive familiarity, slaps him on the back. While he is stooping down rubbing his feet, it throws itself with delirious joy around his head, and he is black in the face before he can struggle away from its embrace. When he is least expecting anything of the kind, it flies round and gives him a playful flick upon some particularly tender part of his body that sends him springing with a yell ten feet up into the air.  WHIRLING MAZE AND THEN LIGHTLY SKIP AWAY FROM IT DRY AND SMILING BUT THAT IS NOT THE MANNER IN WHICH THE DRIPPING UNTAUGHT BRITTON ATTEMPTS TO WIPE HIMSELF UPON A SHEET THE METHOD HE ADOPTS IS TO CLUTCH THE SHEET WITH BOTH HANDS LEAN UP AGAINST THE WALL AND RUB HIMSELF WITH IT IN TRYING TO GET THE THING ROUND TO THE BACK OF HIM HE DROPS HALF OF IT INTO THE WATER AND FROM THAT MOMENT THE BATHROOM IS NOT BIG ENOUGH TO ENABLE HIM TO GET AWAY FOR AN INSTANT FROM THAT WET HALF WHEN HE IS WIPING THE FRONT OF HIMSELF WITH THE DRY HALF THE WET HALF CLIMBS ROUND BEHIND AND IN A SPIRIT OF OFFENSIVE FAMILIARITY SLAPS HIM ON THE BACK WHILE HE IS STOOPING DOWN RUBBING HIS FEET IT THROWS ITSELF WITH DELIRIOUS JOY AROUND HIS HEAD AND HE IS BLACK IN THE FACE BEFORE HE CAN STRUGGLE AWAY FROM ITS EMBRACE WHEN HE IS LEAST EXPECTING ANYTHING OF THE KIND IT FLIES ROUND AND GIVES HIM A PLAYFUL FLICK UPON SOME PARTICULARLY TENDER PART OF HIS BODY THAT SENDS HIM SPRINGING WITH A YELL TEN FEET UP INTO THE AIR
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