large/4193/great_god_pan_1108_librivox_64kb_mp3/greatgodpan_03_machen_64kb_6
large/4193/great_god_pan_1108_librivox_64kb_mp3/greatgodpan_03_machen_64kb
English
4193
"But your property, Herbert? You had land in Dorset." "I sold it all; the fields and woods, the dear old house—everything." "And the money?" "She took it all from me." BUT YOUR PROPERTY HERBERT YOU HAD LAND IN DORSET I SOLD IT ALL THE FIELDS AND WOODS THE DEAR OLD HOUSE EVERYTHING AND THE MONEY SHE TOOK IT ALL FROM ME
ried Helen. Villiers, that woman, if I can call her woman, corrupted my soul. The night of the wedding I found myself sitting in her bedroom in the hotel, listening to her talk. She was sitting up in bed, and I listened to her as she spoke in her beautiful voice, spoke of things which even now I would not dare whisper in the blackest night, though I stood in the midst of a wilderness. You, Villiers, you may think you know life, and London, and what goes on day and night in this dreadful city; for all I can say you may have heard the talk of the vilest, but I tell you you can have no conception of what I know, not in your most fantastic, hideous dreams can you have imaged forth the faintest shadow of what I have heard—and seen. Yes, seen. I have seen the incredible, such horrors that even I myself sometimes stop in the middle of the street and ask whether it is possible for a man to behold such things and live. In a year, Villiers, I was a ruined man, in body and soul—in body and soul.” G AND IN THREE MONTHS I MARRIED HELEN VILLIERS THAT WOMAN IF I CAN CALL HER WOMAN CORRUPTED MY SOUL THE NIGHT OF THE WEDDING I FOUND MYSELF SITTING IN HER BEDROOM IN THE HOTEL LISTENING TO HER TALK SHE WAS SITTING UP IN BED AND I LISTENED TO HER AS SHE SPOKE IN HER BEAUTIFUL VOICE SPOKE OF THINGS WHICH EVEN NOW I WOULD NOT DARE WHISPER IN THE BLACKEST NIGHT THOUGH I STOOD IN THE MIDST OF A WILDERNESS YOU VILLIERS YOU MAY THINK YOU KNOW LIFE AND LONDON AND WHAT GOES ON DAY AND NIGHT IN THIS DREADFUL CITY FOR ALL I CAN SAY YOU MAY HAVE HEARD THE TALK OF THE VIOLENCE BUT I TELL YOU YOU CAN HAVE NO CONCEPTION OF WHAT I KNOW NOT IN YOUR MOST FANTASTIC HIDEOUS DREAMS CAN YOU HAVE IMAGED FORTH THE FAINTEST SHADOW OF WHAT I HAVE HEARD AND SEEN YES SEEN I HAVE SEEN THE INCREDIBLE SUCH HORRORS THAT EVEN I MYSELF SOMETIMES STOP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET AND ASK WHETHER IT IS POSSIBLE FOR A MAN TO BEHOLD SUCH THINGS AND LIVE IN A YEAR VILLIERS I WAS A RUINED MAN IN BODY AND SOUL IN BODY AND SOUL
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