Connie I want to be reasonable with you.  You have a house here with us.  You can live here with your kids...and you won't be deprived of anything.  I don't know much about Merle; I don't know what he does for a living; what he lives on.  Why don't you tell him marriage is really out of the question; and that you can't see him any more. He'll understand.  But if you disobey me and marry this pimp...it would disappoint me.