

Ive been waiting over 6 months for my ADD referral...

(15 Posts)
SherbetVodka Wed 28-Nov-12 11:58:25

How are you doing today, recall?

recall Wed 28-Nov-12 01:29:59

Thank you all so much for the replies, it makes me feel loads better knowing that I am not alone.

sherbertvodka I agree with the sense of shame that just becomes part of you, and the humiliation of slightly fucking everything up on a daily basis. I feel like a second rate person, and always have done.

I am tempted to go private, I was just trying to explain to my Mum, that the very fact I suffer from ADD makes sorting all this referral bollocks quite difficult in itself.

fuzzpig the nob head who assessed me at the GP's wasn't at all helpful. He kept looking all incredulous when I described myself, and making a bit of a drama out of the fact that I didn't stick to the topic. He had to keep trying to sum it all up for his form, and had a slight pained look on his face when I kept jumping from one subject to the next....HELLO !!!!! T W A T !!!!! He was young, and I was thinking...why are you in this job if this is your level of understanding of me right now ???? I was rather hoping for some understanding nods grin

I can't bare to think where i could have got to in my education had I had some support like 1605 describes sad it makes me feel sick inside when I think of that.

<<big sigh>>

Crawling Tue 27-Nov-12 21:12:02

I would also say the same as fuzzpig it doesn't matter how high some doctors are just crap when i was younger i saw a newly qualified psychologist who was great but the child pychiatrist i saw was really unreachable and made me feel like i couldn't talk to him but im I've seen 3 pychiatrist 3 psychologists and a few cpns but only one that i didn't like hopefully yours will be great.

1605 Tue 27-Nov-12 20:59:01

Really sorry my post was such a downer, and thank you for the support and sympathy. In fact I'm vastly improved now, back at work running my business and generally feeling chipper about everything.

The point that I was very badly making was that you shouldn't raise your hopes and that you may find going private - with its faster referral and wider number of therapies at your disposal - worthwhile.

But do go via your GP; far too many fakes and charlatans in the business.

fuzzpig Tue 27-Nov-12 20:36:30

I also understand completely about everything 'falling into place' - for me it wasn't a description of ADD (though I do have some traits - just nowhere near enough for a dx) but for Aspergers. I'd known of it for years but it was only when somebody on MN suggested it, I read symptom lists and my jaw hit the floor.

It was like all my life I've been wandering the universe, lost and alone, and had suddenly stumbled on my home planet.

I am really sorry you had a shit time of it 1605 sad - nobody deserves that.
I just wanted to say though that they aren't all like that, please don't give up before you've started, recall smile when I saw a psychologist for CBT, he really did help me deal with a lot of what was happening at the time. The right professional makes all the difference, whether it's a GP or a highly qualified specialist. I have seen my fair share of total fuckwits too, believe me! For example, the head of the psych unit where I spent 6 months, who believed that "self harmers are manipulative, attention seeking and a waste of space".

It's a mixed blessing though, isn't it... realising there is a reason for your problems is good because it takes away some of the self blame... but then, the resentment that you didn't get the help you deserved at a younger age, and the realisation that you will always have ADD/AS etc... it's hard to come to terms with it. Nothing has physically changed since I realised I have it - and yet my world has been turned upside down.

Sorry I am rambling now. thanks

Crawling Tue 27-Nov-12 19:50:32

I can sympathise but like the previous poster said unfortunately there is a triage i had to wait 3months while non episodes for type 1bipolar/scizoaffective but while this was hard i am glad as when i have been at a dangerous level I've had appointments in a week. Though unlike previous poster I was given head pychiatrist and the more senior psychologist and found both very helpful, kind and understanding particularly my pychiatrist he understands me and normally its really hard to tell someone what i experience but i can tell him the voices told me to kill everyone and he acts like i said i had chips for lunch which is great as i don't need to be ashamed i can tell him anything.

Have faith when your appointment comes im everything should get better.

1605 Tue 27-Nov-12 18:52:29

Don't imagine getting to the top of the waiting list will solve your problems.

I have lengthy experience of NHS treatment of a non-life-threatening pyschological disorder (PTSD, which shares many external behaviours with ADD) and I'm sorry to say it was absolutely woeful, to the point that I was more distressed and dysfunctional afterwards!

My psychologist was far too young and too inexperienced to be helpful in any way. (Older and more experienced ones are assigned to the more serious cases during NHS triage assessment, such as victims of rape, war-crime and terrorism etc. This is understandable, but incredibly frustrating for the patient because your symptoms are the same even if the original cause was innocuous by comparison).

My "talking therapy"/CBT with this fresh out of college psych hopelessly out of her depth gave me depression so bad I couldn't get out of bed for days - not ideal when you're self-employed. Ofcourse, once she caused this additional problem she couldn't fix it, because psychologists are not medically qualified and cannot prescribe drugs.

More importantly, all NHS psychologists are restricted in the therapies they can employ to those which NICE have approved. Fine in theory until you realise some of the most effective mental health therapies - such as meditation and self-hypnosis, EFT, REBT and acupuncture - are not approved because they are not commercially viable and therefore don't warrant funding for the required clinical testing, not because they don't actually work.

Would you consider going private? If so, ask your GP for a referral to an ADD specialist (perhaps to both a psychologist and a psychiatrist). There are various books about ADD written by Daniel Amen which I read as part of my treatment and which I can recommend. If your attention span is shot, ask someone to read it for you and then tell you only the most relevant info.

Whether you're prescribed medication or psychological therapies, also think about getting help from a professional organiser. He or she will set up systems to help with the practical management of your condition. A friend of mine's daughter has just achieved 4 A stars in her A levels and credits not the school but the organiser who helped her get her notes and files in order every month!

SherbetVodka Tue 27-Nov-12 18:29:27

Sorry for late reply, meant to type this ages ago but you know how it is! ;)

Well done on coping with more than one DC, seriously. I have one toddler and can't seem to manage to get anything done, let alone be a 'proper' well organised mum so I'm quite in awe of ADD ladies who manage with two or more.

Totally know what you mean about reading the ADD description and everything falling into place. That's exactly how it was for me and it's really helped to actually have an explanation (excuse?) for me just being so rubbish at everything. Although I do still have to fight against a constant sense of shame that just feels like its part of me, has been since I was about five.

Are you on your own or have you got a DH/DP? And do they understand your difficulties? My DH knows about my diagnosis but can't quite believe that my untidiness and disorganisation and borderline agoraphobia are caused by neurological issues, not by me just being a lazy arsed cow. Fortunately, he's extremely laid back and rarely gets that pissed off, he just laughs at the mess the house is in and at my "excuses".

Thing is, I hate being like this. Mess and chaos actually depress me, it's not like I enjoy any of it!

Sorry for not having any real advice, just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.

bitsnbobs Tue 27-Nov-12 18:02:45

I had to go in three times and keep nagging to get my referral. I then had to wait another six months for appt. All I can say is keep trying, and check out Adders website some good info about getting referral.

recall Tue 27-Nov-12 14:04:22

Thanks for the replies.
sherbetvodka I will order that book . I didn't know much about ADD, had only heard of ADHD and associated it with young boys who run round too much grin I was on MN reading a thread about how to be organised, and someone suggested ADD to the OP. I went and googled it, and when I read the symptoms I went hot and cold - it was like a description of me. I identified with it immediately. When I read that there are treatments etc, I thought I ought to go to the GP and get help, if indeed I had ADD. Initially, I was excited that there was a reason for my.....thing...odd personality etc. during the past six months though, I have began feeling very sad and sorry for myself that I have struggled so hard all of my life to manage. I just keep looking to past situations and cringing.....all the fuck ups, and missed opportunities. I think how I could have achieved had I been diagnosed as a child. When I read my school reports it is all in there. "Jane was doing very well in her A level Art until she lost a folder containing a year's worth of course work" hmm

Have never been able to stick at a job for more than about 9 months, and have had several different careers. Have unfinished several courses. My/our personal finances are in a terrible mess, and I have wasted thousands on impulse purchases and projects/fads, which all petered out.

I suffer from anxiety, and addiction problems. I always feel very different to other people and am fascinated at how they live their lives. I can never seem to get to bed until after 01.00 and wake up feeling fekked every day. My poor kids are all over the place because although I can establish very good routines, I can never stick to them, so teeth brushing, bed time stories all get done but at varying times of the day. Every day is just random, yesterday, i had several important jobs to do, including paying overdue playgroup fees, and making Doctor appointments for the children. Instead, at 09.30, I found myself making fucking candles shock I really hope that I do get a diagnosis of ADD, otherwise I'm fucked !!! What does that make me??? I would love to get some help with my every day life.

Thanks for listening, I got on a bit of a role there sad

SherbetVodka Tue 27-Nov-12 12:48:56

Inattentive not I attentive.

fuzzpig Tue 27-Nov-12 12:48:42

Argh, how frustrating. I have had similar delays from my local mental health trust. You really have to chase them it seems.

Mine only got chased up when I went back to the GP and said how much more I was struggling day to day, and he phoned the crisis team who bugged them for me.

SherbetVodka Tue 27-Nov-12 12:48:13

Mumblechum, it's attention deficit disorder.

Recall, sorry I can't be of any help but hopefully someone will be along soon who can. I have ADD too and know how crap it is and how difficult it makes day to day life.

Have you read any books about women with ADD? There's an excellent one by Sari Solden called "Women with attention deficit disorder". I found it was really good for just helping me to accept my differences ie disorganisation and procrastination, etc. Don't know if that makes any sense, I just mean that it helped me realise that my condition was a part of me and that the disorganisation and so on are just the way I am, not a character failing.

How long have you felt that you've got ADD? And have you got the hyperactivity or is it the I attentive type ?

mumblechum1 Tue 27-Nov-12 12:35:27

Sorry to be dim but what is ADD?

recall Tue 27-Nov-12 12:33:57

I am so upset, having realised at 41 that I may have ADD, went to my GP, who arranged for an initial assessment. The Psychiatric team bloke i saw at my GP's said he would refer me, and that was 6 months ago. I did leave several messages for him and he eventually came back to me and said there had been a problem and he would chase it up. I then received a letter confirming that ~I had been referred. That was about 3 months ago and I haven't heard anything since. I feel so upset that I am struggling with my day to day life, and all this time, I could be having some form of help. What can i do?

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