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Do you wake up before your kids?

post #1 of 26
Thread Starter 
My daughter wakes up every morning at 8am. On school days I'm up by 7:30am, but otherwise I'm still asleep when she crawls in bed with us and wants breakfast. She can make her own toast and help herself to yogurt and fruit from the kitchen, so usually I beg off for a while and get an additional half hour of sleep (sometimes longer!).

But this bugs me... my parents were ALWAYS awake before I was growing up! It's weird to me that my daughter is growing up with a "sleeping mommy" who doesn't want to leap out of bed first thing in the morning. I'm heavily dependent on sleep, too - if I don't get eight hours, I can barely get out from under the covers! My daughter doesn't like it, either.

Is this normal? Since I was a late riser even as a child, I'm conditioned to think that in normal families the parents are up before the kids. I have all these great memories of waking up to the smell of coffee and pancakes cooking, and my parents (chipperly) sitting around the breakfast table. I WANT THAT... but it just seems to conflict with my biology.

So... do you get up before your kids, and do you think it's important? Is my child going to be scarred for life because I sleep in? And does anyone have any helpful tips for transforming yourself into a morning person?

post #2 of 26
My parents were always up before me growing up too. But my mom's got weird sleep habits, she can't sleep past 5 in the morning, ever.

Weekdays, I'm up and gone before anyone else wakes up. But weekends, the boys always wake up at 7:30. They usually play, watch cartoons and eat something before dh and I get up.

I don't have any advice. I hate getting up at 5:30 on weekdays, so on the weekends, I need to stay in bed later, even if I'm awake. I guess I don't see it as a big deal, just how some people do things.
post #3 of 26
I'm always up before DS but that's for MY sake, not his. I need some quiet time when I first get up. Time to make lunches, drink a cup of coffee and skim the newspaper before shifting into full-on Mommy Mode. The mornings that he's up early are really difficult for me.

I don't think it's a big deal but if it bothers you, maybe you can try going to bed a bit earlier so you get up earlier. I need my sleep, too, so I'm in bed by 9:30, at the latest.
post #4 of 26
I aspire to be up before my kids. I have these rosy fantasies of being up and cheerful and dressed and cooking a beautiful breakfast.

It never happens, though.

I am apparently constitutionally incapable of waking up one minute before I need to. When I was working, I routinely got up less than ten minutes before time to leave the house.

I get up every morning when DS finally loses his patience with me, and climbs on my head and starts shouting "I need my MILK!" in my ear at top volume. My girls learned long ago to stay in their room and amuse themselves until I get up, but DS has less patience and is very hungry in the morning. I plan to teach him to get his own milk, very soon.

I wouldn't worry about it. Kids are smart and resilient and flexible and they'll love you even if you're a slug-a-bed. My mom never got up early either. Actually, when I got older, she didn't even get out of bed in the morning-- she had a phone installed in my room, on a separate line, and she'd call me up from her room and let it ring until I got mad and got up. My brother was a morning person, so he was always up, and we'd get our own breakfast, and by the time we were ready to leave for school, my mom would have dragged herself up. Anyway, it did me no harm and didn't bother me any-- she was a fantastic mother, and always there for me when I really needed her, and I never missed having her be some kind of shiny-happy morning person.
post #5 of 26
My parents were always up before me too, but I was notoriously great sleeper...and still would be if I hadn't been gifted with my son.

On weekdays I'm up almost an hour and a half before him with no problem.
On weekends we get up together. I really tried to be up before him just to get some time to myself, but he'd just get up with me.

Strangest thing...no matter what time I decide to wake up, he matches the time. If I get up at 5am, he's up too. If I sleep till 8am, he'll sleep too. So, I just decided to stop trying to beat him up.

...but my parents would NEVER do the co-sleeping thing. It wasn't even an option. I never got the option of being snuggled up next to one of them for the whole night.
post #6 of 26
It really depends on the day. I haven't had to get up to wake up my oldest since he was around 8. He is always up when he needs to be and gets himself ready. I used to make sure to be up to help him get ready but now that he is 14, all I can do is wave as he walks out the door so I don't bother anymore.

My little ones sometimes sleep late and I typically get up around 8:00 (lazy me!). So occasionally they will wake up and then wake me up but most days I'm up before them. I don't feel comfortable with sleeping while they are playing so as soon as they wake up, I'm up.
post #7 of 26
Yes - but thats only because the sun is shining now and I am up around 7 or 8 and my son wakes up much later than that around 9 or 10 because we don't do 'bedtime' and he goes to bed when we go to bed - around 10 or 11 so still gets 10-12 hours of sleep!

I love it. It means I can get up and tidy the kitchen and bathroom, etc before he gets up! hehe

When he was a bit younger and went to bed earlier - he did get up for a bit before me.

But - he has either always been really great at sleeping or really great at entertaining himself.
post #8 of 26
No we're not up before the kids and I don't see any harm in it. The only benefit I can see of having grown up with my grandmother getting up before I did was that she had breakfast on the table when I first came in. Anything I need to do to prepare for the morning can be done the night before, and DH and I are nightowls. Of course, with elementary aged children who STILL do not sleep through the night, I figure it's a fair enough trade off - you wake me up all night, don't expect me up before you! LOL!
post #9 of 26
my kids are always up before dh and i, usually one of us will get up with them, i'm longing for the day they can all get up on their own!!! doesn't bother me whatsoever, we're not morning people by any means (not really late night people either!!!).

growing up i actually asked my mom to stay in bed!!! i liked getting up, getting my own breakfast and having time to myself!!!!
post #10 of 26
No. Usually my husband is up before them, though. He's out of town right now, and I'm sick, so I woke my 7 yr. old up for school at 8 (actually, I woke his light-sleeping little brother up who then harassed him into wakefulness), reminded him to brush his teeth, pack his snack, and wear a raincoat, and went back to sleep until 10:30. My 4 yr. old ate breakfast with his brother then played on the computer until he came in at 10:30 to snuggle.
I'd rather my kids have a rested, happy, fun mom the rest of the time than to have me awake before them. I don't even see why that'd be something to strive for. And when the new baby is born this summer, I imagine she and I will be in bed nursing until after both boys have left for school.
post #11 of 26
I'm up before my kids, but I am a morning person and wake up naturally around 6:30am (even on weekends, when I actually wish I could sleep later ). If it's not you, don't force it.
post #12 of 26
The idea is a nice one but I am not about to wake up at 4:30am to be up before my kids. They wake up around 5-5:30am each day.
post #13 of 26
DH doesn't have to work til 9 and the kids are in PM school so we all wake when we wake. Usually the kids wake first and come right in to our room for a snuggle, but lately they have been enjoying playing together for a while first.

Next year DS will have a full day at school. I plan to be up before him then so I can be "on" to get him out the door.
post #14 of 26
My son is an early riser so I only get up before him to have a few moments to myself. Certainly not to be chipper and make pancakes.

Give yourself a break. Listen to your body. Your dd is probably better off for it the rest of the day having a well-rested Mama.

(Besides, you should see what passes for family dinnertime around here. We can't all do things perfectly all the time. Body rythms and work schedules get in the way).
post #15 of 26
No way, DD wakes by 6am, and has often done 5:30 (or 4:30, like much of the past few months, blerg!) We moved her bedtime back so she is better about lasting until 6 but she can't go later than that, if you keep her up later, she just wakes up earlier. I know I need to sleep when she does, esp b/c I can't nap when she does as I teach in the afternoons. I would love to wake and walk and shower and all that... someday maybe. For now, I hope for the day when we can do all that fun morning stuff together, w/o it having to be about helping her into her pants
post #16 of 26
Well, it 3 kids, someone is almost always awake before me. I don't sleep in, I am up by 6:30 most days, sleeping in is till 7. It would be nice to sleep in more, but it never happens. I need to get up early on the weekdays to get DD1 out the door for school. On the weekend it never fails, that the baby who will sleep in till 8 most week day mornings, will get up really early.
post #17 of 26
My dd is usually up before me and trying to wake me up unless I have set the alarm clock to get up early. She thinks it is funny and I am fine with it. She is a morning person and just hops right out of bed happy to go about her day. I am not really awake until after my first cup of coffee, especially if I don't have enough sleep.
post #18 of 26
No. And I want to be one of those moms too!! I want to get up before them. Even if it's only long enough to start the coffee. Ideally I could have a cup of coffee, and start cooking something for breakfast.

But my 4 yo is up usually an hour before I'm ready to be. She wakes up the 8 yo after about a half hour then they'll play together. Before the 4 yo came along, my older, and then only would occupy himself in his room for a good half hour before letting me know that he was ready to start his day.

I am not, and have never been an early riser. Like a PP said, I was always getting up when I needed to be leaving in 10 minutes.

4 minute power showers, and dressing while still damp and running out the door with a coke, poptarts and wet hair. Yep. that's me. Even when I DO set an alarm and get up, I'm still running out the door with wet hair. I'm just NOT a morning person!!

My son has to take a state test in a month at 8 am. I am DREADING it! I'm gong to have to get up at freaking 6 am just to manage to leave the house on time!!! I know the kids will just spring into action though, "wake up breakfast is on the table.." and they go. They rock. I'm the lazy bum that didn't get out of bed until 11:00 today!!

Though I blame it on anestisa and drugs from having my wisdom teeth out on Friday It's times like this that I am thankful that I AM the way I am, otherwise my children would be very confused. They came to ask me this morning around 8:45 if they could have a bowl of dry cereal and if my oldest could pour cups of milk. "yes, of course, you can! thank you very much dude "

I hated waking up and seeing what time it was, but I am glad they were able to get themselves something to eat. Now I'm off to make a delicious, nutritious hot lunch for them because I even though they ate Mommy Guilt is telling me to make them lunch
post #19 of 26
Yes, I am always up before my kids. I love to get up early (5:30-6:00 ish) and do my daily devotional and have a couple cups of coffee before I get the kids up for school.
post #20 of 26
i *wish* i got up before DD, but it's rare. she's usually up by 7am and it's hard for me to get up even then!
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