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Victoria Joy Headshot

Let's Help Kim and Kanye Choose a Baby Name

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If only Lil' Kim hadn't been snapped up, this would have been so much simpler...

This little tyke is set to be the queen of semi-celebrity mini-mes. With her gene pool, there'll be no shortage of big glossy hair or risk of a diminutive ego later in life. Surely her name should encompass all of our expectations in one simple word - which makes the naming game quite a toughie for Kimye.

I wouldn't want to give the impression that the two aren't capable of lexical brilliance - after all, it was Mr West who coined the fabulously introspective lyric: "Man I promise, I'm so self conscious / That's why you always see me with at least 1 of my watches", but a little inspiration never hurts.

So here's some already-great names (I use the term loosely) that they could choose from if they're struggling, all following the signature Kardashian K start, obviously:

Karen - Tilda Swinton wanted to talk about Kevin but I think we should all sit down and spend some time thinking about Karen. Such a dependable moniker, you'd always know where you stood with Karen. She'd be like an open book, of which there's no doubt very few in the Kardashian/West household.

Kenny - this kid is going to need resilience, and lots of it. Who better to take inspiration from than a character who died every episode and still kept coming back for more?

Khaki - if Jay-Z and Beyonce can get away with naming their kid a colour, there's no reason Kim and Kanye can't do the same. (Alternative option: key lime.)

Kelly - whether you're thinking Brook or Kapowski, Kelly's tend to be those lucky specimens that all girls want to be and all boys want a piece of. Exactly what I imagine Kim wants for her little princess.

Kabbalah - it's done so much good for Madonna's public image, Kimye would do well to follow in her footsteps, no?