Garrett Cook


Garrett Cook is 27. For now. Who knows what will happen in the future? He lives in the Northwest Suburbs of Illinois with his girlfriend of five years. They hope to own property together someday, so tell everybody you know about this book, even people that you don´t think will like it very much. He is a member of the Bizarro fiction movement and is the winner of the First Annual Ultimate Bizarro Showdown. His books Murderland Part 1: H8 and Murderland Part 2: Life During Wartime have been published by hacker warlord Emperor Needle and his Evil Nerd Empire. He works for them as Sanitizer Overlord, which is every bit as awesome as it sounds. He still feels deeply connected to his past, but would rather it leave him alone. He is prone to strange fancies and dark moods. He is paranoid and a worrier. He is virtually unemployable, but he tries, dammit. He is happy sometimes, he is sad sometimes, he is human all of the time, more so than anything else, so don´t judge him as harshly as he does or as Clyde does.

Where to find Garrett Cook online

Where to buy in print


Archelon Ranch
Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 30,730. Language: English. Published: October 28, 2010 by LegumeMan Books. Category: Fiction » Science fiction » General
In an primeval jungle-city state, Bernard, a test subject for science experiments, is showing side effects. Greater levels of Objectivity cause his consciousness to merge with his surroundings until finally he hears the call in the mind of a tyrannosaurus. Archelon Ranch, a paradise like no other, is summoning Bernard on a quest that wil reveal the truth behind the absurd world that surrounds him.

Garrett Cook’s tag cloud

bizarro    cult    fantasy    horror    legumeman    metafiction    neopulp    science fiction    underground