Julian Assange gets my support to evade America's clutches... but not the courts in Sweden

George Galloway should be urging Assange to clear his name in Sweden, not contributing to a rape-deniers’ manual

In the 1950s The Mirror’s Cassandra penned a famous “tribute” to Liberace.

“A deadly, winking, sniggering, snuggling, chromium-plated, scent-impregnated, luminous, quivering, giggling, mincing, ­fruit-flavoured, ice-covered heap of mother love,” he so generously called him.

Reading the reviews of WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange’s performance on the Ecuador embassy balcony on Sunday, I thought I’d stumbled across an act of mass plagiarism.

To be fair, the Evita-esque love-in was nausea-inducing.

How can a supposed freedom-fighter give a heart-rending speech about the dangers of an oppressive world without mentioning what he was doing on the balcony – evading extradition to Sweden on serious sex charges?

But let’s not forget why that embassy has been turned into a siege scene.

Forces in America view Assange as a terrorist for revealing their dirty secrets and want him silenced.

He gets my support to evade their clutches, but not the courts in Stockholm.

So why did George Galloway record a podcast, informing us that Assange is guilty of nothing more than “bad sexual etiquette”?

What gives a middle-aged man with no concrete knowledge of what happened between Assange and his accusers the right to suddenly enlighten us on the complexities of rape: “Not ­everybody needs to be asked prior to each insertion.


So a woman can’t change her mind in between “insertions” (what a gorgeous image of George that is) even if, as one of Assange’s accusers claims, she was asleep at the time? And at what point does a man need to seek fresh consent for his “insertions”?

If Assange hadn’t declared war on the Pentagon, would Galloway even begin to offer such a misguided defence of a stranger accused of rape?

Assange faces the prospect of being charged with four separate sexual offences in Sweden.


In his extradition hearing, a British magistrate said that if three of the allegations were proven they would contravene our Sexual Offences Act, and a fourth would constitute rape.

As a supposedly serious ­politician, Galloway should be urging Assange to clear his name in Sweden, not contributing to a rape-deniers’ manual.

How ironic Galloway claimed the rape ­allegation “has all the hallmarks of a set-up” by America, just as ­Republican Congressman Todd Akin demeans the seriousness of rape in the same dismissive language as his.

But maybe we shouldn’t be surprised. Galloway did, after all, in 1994, salute the “strength, courage and indefatigability” of despot Saddam Hussein and in 2005, hailed Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad as a “breath of fresh air.”

This is the man who vacated his ­responsibilities as a London MP to enter Big Brother and crawl around licking pretend milk from Rula Lenska’s hand “for Palestine.”

At least Akin apologised for his shamefully ­inaccurate words. Galloway hasn’t – his ego won’t allow him to admit he’s wrong.

I hope this further convinces voters seduced by Galloway in that March by-election that he is not a glorious anti-Establishment messiah concerned with the needs of working-class Bradford.

And that they take the view he’s just an eloquent narcissist spouting confused student politics to make him look like he’s the only super-human on earth battling the bad guys.

Now play fair, boys

I’M not surprised that Tory politicians are seven times more likely to sell school playing fields than Labour ones.

Because I’m guessing that the ­government ministers most ­responsible for turning grass into Redrow homes remember them as scenes of brutal humiliation.

Michael Gove clearly perfected that startled haddock look being kicked senseless around a football pitch for being a ­brown-nosing geek.

Shortly before David Cameron took his O-Levels he was caught smoking cannabis, fined, and banned from going outside Eton’s grounds. So whenever he sees a playing field he must go cold at the thought of voters being reminded of his druggie youth (which I’ve just done.)

Eric Pickles was ­obviously forced to go on cross-country runs but ended up walking at the back with the other fat lads only to be screamed at by a PE teacher, thwacked on his ample backside and thrown into a cold shower.

And it was no doubt on the fields of Oxford that the ­Bullingdon Club boys who dubbed George Osborne “Oik” dangled him by his feet, and banged his head on the floor, until he yelled “I am a despicable ****.”

Surely, if any of that had happened to you, you’d want every school ­playing field (apart from the ones you pay to send your kids to) turned to ­concrete to wipe away the mental scars.

Royal dogsbody's to blame

I WAS intrigued by the story that Princess Beatrice’s dog Max has been mauled by the corgis at Balmoral.

A royal source said: “The Queen’s dog-boy was taking the corgis for a walk and they were joined by three Norfolk terriers which came with Prince Andrew... they began fighting among themselves and the dog-boy lost control.”

Hang on there. The Queen has a “dog boy”? I didn’t know a job existed even lower down the royal food chain than Nicholas Witchell’s?

Tory MPs' 'work book' is hypocritical

FIVE Tory MPs have written a book which claims that British people need to work harder.

Seeing as those MPs are now in the middle of an 11-week summer break, have another week’s break in November then three weeks for Christmas, that accusation feels like Gary Glitter shouting “paedo” at dads who kiss their daughters goodbye at the primary school gate.

Tony Scott made films for punters

TONY Scott was a director who made films for punters not critics.

So how apt that when he threw himself off a ­California bridge, landing feet from a harbour cruise, passengers filmed his final moments on their phones?

I’m guessing it’s what he would have wanted.

Henry Wyndham's grouse injury

THE Old Etonian chairman of Sotheby’s, Henry Wyndham, is recovering after being blasted in the face with lead pellets on the first day of the grouse shooting season while taking part in a shoot organised by an ­American hedge-fund manager.

Finally I get why they call it the Glorious Twelfth.

5 big questions of the week

1 If Asil Nadir goes to prison will Tory MP Michael Mates shorten the message on the watch he gave him to: “Don’t let the b******s grind you”?

2 Elton John fearing his son will be mocked in school because he hasn’t got a mum. Surely having a dad who looks like an over made-up granny after a bad night at the bingo compensates?

3 Tesco facing a £200,000 fine for ­employing illegal foreign students. Will their new motto be “Every Lithuanian Helps”?

4 With the amount of coverage given to a 91-year-old’s minor medical worries, is the BBC about to set up a Royal Bladder Correspondent?

5 If we give 16 and 17-year-olds the vote will we have to keep polling booths open until 6am and offer a free Jagermeister shot with every X?


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