'Pompeii' review: Disaster movie destroys ancient city, modern patience

Emily Browning, left, and Kit Harington in "Pompeii." (Caitlin Cronenberg/TriStar Pictures/MCT)
Follow on Twitter
on February 21, 2014 at 7:00 AM, updated February 21, 2014 at 7:10 AM

In a world where a mighty empire holds millions in its grasp, where wars are fought in both the arena and the bedroom -- and the rumblings of discontent are now echoed by the grumblings of a volcano -- comes one man, made for this time.


No, that ad campaign doesn't really work, does it?


You might think that a volcanic eruption that destroyed a thriving city of about 20,000 would be enough to hold the camera's attention.

You witless barbarian.

No, lava isn't enough for "Pompeii." We have to have earthquakes. Tidal waves. And a collision of '70s bad-movie cliches so shameless, all that's missing is Charlton Heston as a brave centurion or Richard Chamberlain as an evil Roman architect. (Or at least George Kennedy as a lovable old gladiator.)

Instead, we get Kit Harington from "Game of Thrones," who looks like Eric Bana's much duller kid brother, and Emily Browning, who doesn't look like much of anything.


Neither young star gives this dusty relic any life at all, even though Browning has trouble keeping her toga modestly arranged. The surrounding players, low on star power, don't help much. Jared Harris and Carrie-Anne Moss play the mild maiden's parents; Kiefer Sutherland is the sibilant and hissable Roman villain.


Audiences will have a harder time doing that, particularly when the director, Paul W.S. Anderson, gives in to his cheap action-movie roots and love of excess. It's a spectacle, all right -- but mostly just of a lot of people, some of whom should know better, making an utter ash of themselves.

-- Stephen Whitty



Grade: D

Rating: PG-13

Running time: 105 min.

Cast and crew: Kit Harington, Emily Browning, Jared Harris, Carrie-Anne Moss, Kiefer Sutherland, Jean-Francois Lachapelle, Rebecca Eady; directed by Paul W.S. Anderson.

The lowdown: Utter nonsense, with bland hero Kit Harrington and bland heroine Emily Browning dodging lava and cliches in the ancient world. It's a tossup as to which ultimately proves fatal. The film contains violence and sensuality.