Kim Porter is Ready to Pop

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But it could be worse. She could be experiencing the wrath of Suge Knight, for example. That is one scary motherf*%ker you don't want to piss off.

Or Kim could be forced to listen to an Ali Lohan album. We're pretty sure child birth is nothing compared to that.

Meanwhile, if Diddy and Kim are in need of names, we're sorry to report the following, sad news: Thijs is taken.

However, the possibility of a play date with Jayden James Federline and numerous other mystery celebrity babies remains.