Prompt: 03--Awkward
Title: Ike's Faux Pas
A/N: Again, written for the FE Drabble comm on LJ. I anticipate hate. I guess it can kind of count as a continuation? But...not really? I'll stop.

It was a joyous day for Elincia and the rest of the Greil Mercenaries: Ike had arrived from where ever the hell he'd gone off to for the past eight months. The Queen of Crimea instantly held a feast for Ike and his friends.

Shinon didn't go, saying that he and Gatrie would not be attending the banquet held in "your stupid honor" because "I don't want to be hanging around you, all those sub-humans and royals".

Though, Ranulf was the only 'sub-human' that was attending. …And Elincia was the only 'royal' in the first place.

After doing this really weird head movement, Shinon left. The blond knight considered ditching his best friend (there were some fine lookin' ladies in that room), but he pretty much abandoned that plan when Shinon told him to, quote: "Get your ass over here!"

So here they were now, seated at the very long (extra long) table, a whole meal spread out in front of them. Ike had started to reach for a drumstick, but Titania slapped his hand before he could.

"Good to have you back, Ike." Lucia said…well, she had to yell, since he was halfway across the room.

The table was really long.

He grunted, but she didn't hear it, so he nodded his head. Sadly, she couldn't tell. So he simply screamed: "Glad to be back!"

They all began to eat after that, and Ike described to everyone the…'tournament' he'd been in.

No one actually cared. Well, Geoffrey kind of did.

Ranulf looked up thoughtfully at the ceiling. "I heard that there was a tropical storm off the coast of Kilvas…"

"Hah!" Came a drunken cry from outside the palace banquet room. "Serves them feathered half-breeds right!"

"Shiiiinnoon! You shouldn't be saying thingssss like thaat."

"Anyway," Ranulf continued, ignoring the unseen archer's outburst. "It really caused some damage, but there were no casualties reported." And then he grinned over at their 'Guest of Honor'. "King Tibarn said that it kind of reminded him of our boy Ike over here."

Mist giggled, "That's funny…I can so see that too! It looks powerful, but doesn't do anything!"

Ike gave her a look. "One, Mist, that didn't make any sense. And two…" He looked around, staring into everyone's eyes one-by-one (well, not so much Oscar's), "That storm is nothing like me."

Boyd snorted, "Why not?"

Ike looked at him, and in the most uninspired voice ever, "Because I fight for my friends. It doesn't."

A heavy silence hung in the air: a very…awkward silence. A drunken laugh came from the other side of the door, and also the sound of Shinon (or Gatrie) dropping a glass on the floor.

Ike shrugged, "What's wrong guys?" Again, his voice held no inspiration at all. "Everyone back at the…'tournament' gave me the same look too. …Guys?"

Ike's 'friends' all stood and quickly exited the room; when the door opened, there was Shinon and Gatrie laughing themselves into a coma. Soren stayed, though, and simply shook his head.

"I don't get it, Soren. Everyone acts as if saying that is the biggest faux pas ever, or something."

"Because it is, Ike."


"Never again, Ike. Never. Again."