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How can I deal with my co-worker's rude comments about my size?


My co-worker (who's never been pregnant) constantly tells me how 'huge' I'm getting. I'm starting my third trimester and my doctor tells me I'm exactly where I should be for weight and size. Her comments didn't bother me at first, but now I find myself getting angry and upset. Nothing I've said has made her stop. What should I do?

Posted: 11/20/2003 by a BabyCenter Member

Mom Answers

Speaking from experience on the other end, I'm very sure she didn't mean to offend you. When I was younger, I had a pregnant coworker and I told her, "Wow, you're getting so big!" I thought she was absolutely adorable with her baby bump. Unfortunately, she took it offensively and she said (and I would suggest it for you, because it shut me right up), "Well, you know just how to make a pregnant woman feel special, don't you!" I apologized and told her that I thought she looked adorable and all was well. Now that I'm 16 weeks pregnant, I'm starting to show a "beer belly" (believe me, I've had strangers ask if that's what was "wrong" with me as they stared in disgust). But everyone at work is wonderful about it and tell me how big I'm getting. I take it as a compliment. It just means my baby and I are healthy and people are noticing. Hope this helps, coming from someone who made your coworker's exact mistake.
posted 01/29/2007 by Myatuck85
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18 out of 19 found this helpful

Just tell them.. Hey! only deluxe accomodations for this kid.. I give him/her nothing but the best!!
posted 04/18/2005 by lovettk
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This happened to me too! A very insensitive coworker (and mother of two, believe it or not) said, "My, you're getting fat!" on three different occasions. The first time I ignored it. The second time I replied that I was at the target weight for this stage in my pregnancy and that I didn't appreciate derogatory comments. The third time I turned her in to HR. It seems drastic that I'd have to go to this extreme, but I was determined not to let her borderline harassing comments ruin my self-esteem or pregnancy experience.
posted 02/01/2006 by a BabyCenter Member
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Just simply say "I'm pregnant what's your excuse" I'm sure they will never say it again.
posted 04/09/2007 by TINA101871
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Or you can always post a top ten list of things not to say to a pregnant women on your office door...
posted 02/03/2004 by a BabyCenter Member
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I have a co-worker that goes out of her way to make me feel good, even though my size doesn't bother me. She always takes care to tell me how big my baby is getting, not me. Puts quite a different spin on it. When she comments on how big you are, try "It's not so much me as my baby - you do know how pregnancy works, don't you?" Say it with a genuine smile and everyone around will think she's a complete idiot.
posted 08/03/2005 by a BabyCenter Member
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I know how you feel. Two of my co-workers keep saying, "Wow! You really look pregnant today. You look like you're about to pop!". I'm 30 weeks pregnant. I just say "thanks, but I'm already very well aware of how pregnant I am, so I really don't need a reminder from anyone". Of course, they still say those comments, they don't seem to be able to take a hint. I don't understand why people do this either, especially people who have been preganant themselves. Both of my co-workers have children and what makes it worse, is that they're both fat! Sometimes I just want to respond by saying, "Wow! You really look fat today!" I think they're just jealous becasue I'm getting all the attention since I'm pregnant so they feel the need to make stupid, rude comments about my body. I don't let it get to me because I know I'm beautiful and my husband loves my pregnant belly. Besides, I know after the baby comes, I'll lose most of the weight and look fabulous again compared to them, so they'll be even more jealous.
posted 05/26/2006 by newtexasmom29
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I think everyone gets the pregnancy comments. I think people have nothing better else to do. I am 18 weeks and I look about 30 weeks, This is my second pregnancy,and I plump out really fast. I get the are you carry twins comment all the time. It gets to the point where I want to fire back a rude comment. But generally I just learn to grin and bear it.
posted 12/17/2003 by domsmom818
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Just say "I have a reason to be fat, do you have a reason to be stupid?"
posted 01/30/2005 by Draigen
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i am 19 weeks pregnant, and have gained approximately 5 pounds. i was 125 pre pregnancy, not skinny, just average weight. i was never one for sweets and junk food so i just eat as i always did, more if i feel hungry. my doc says my weight is fine, but i know how comments can hurt. i was told by a co worker that i will probably get stretch marks because thin people usually do lol. i was also told that my face has changed and by a family member, that my face looks ugly so i must be havinga girl. i was very hurt. then my husband told me to consider the source; this is coming from a woman who gained over 50 pounds with her pregnancy and was heavy to begin with. i think when people see you happy and they themselves are unhappy or ignorant to being pregnant, they say dumb things. dont take offense, just consider where the source is coming from.
posted 01/12/2004 by
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