Stamford Bridge

What's it like?

Deep breath - it's likeable: officially Chelsea's last redeeming feature. You can hate everything in it, and The Village outside it, but you can't hate the Bridge itself, partly for everything it used to be, and partly for the way it has been rebuilt: enclosed, authentic and big - the biggest club ground in London pre-Emirates.

And the away end?

Wildly expensive seats in areas of the upper and lower tiers of the Shed end, depending on demand. Decent views, unless you're near the back of the lower tier, where it's like watching through a letterbox. Lively stewards.

To eat

Football's Famous Chicken Balti Pie? Yes, £2.50. Plus variety of others - mixed reviews - and hot dogs. Concourses big.

Where to drink?

£3 bottles of warm pissy Bud inside; outside, avoid pubs round the ground and try central London or even Greenwich before getting the underground. Or the generic McWetherspoons near Hammersmith Tube.

Make a weekend of it

The best local attractions Dinosaurs! Great big boney dinosaurs! The Natural History Museum is two miles away.

Best home fans' chant

The entertainingly camp: 'Didier Drogba, tra lala lala, Didier Drogba, traaa lalalalala, Didier Drogba, tra lala lala, Didier Drogba, traaa lala lala...'

In local pub row, don't insult

Gianfranco Zola. The Italian Kerry Dixon, but even more loveable.

Overall away trip rating: 5

You'll feel dirty for liking it, but it's got a traditional feel, and there aren't many places better if you manage a win. The always-smug home punters - half gentrified, half old-school Burberry monkeys - don't understand defeat any more. But it loses two points purely for the cost of going there.

Last season 2nd

Top scorer Didier Drogba (20)

Player of the season Michael Essien

10 years ago 97-98: 4th, Premiership. Top scorers: Tore Andre Flo, Gianluca Vialli (11)

20 years ago 87-88: 18th, Division One. Top scorer: Gordon Durie (12)

30 years ago 77-78: 16th, Division One, Top scorer: Tommy Langley (11)

Most league apps: 655 - Ron Harris

Most league goals: 164 - Bobby Tambling

Highest attendance: 82,905 v Arsenal, Division One, 12 October 1935

Prediction: 2nd