Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Life Skills

If you ever have had a conversation with the billing department of your phone company, well, you know exactly how frustrating it can get. Today I discovered that I have a new talent/skill. I am going to it, "phone call complaint perseverance and oral argumentation techniques" just so it can be a very long title, to match up to the very long time I was put on hold. Alas, if only there were more hours in a day that could devote to calling people in customer service, I really could hone this latent skill to perfection. And I am sure they would love to hear from me to. Again. And again. And again.

As guide to help others through their own customer service journeys, I thought I would share somethings that I discovered today.

1. Just keep pressing 1 on the automated phone answering service until you actually speak to a living entity call a "human".
2. The first person you talk to in customer service is a practice run.
3. When you go through the recycling to find the very important tiny bit of paper that came with your bill, do not dump it out on the kitchen table, the floor works much better.
4. When you go through the recycling to find the very important tiny bit of paper that came with your bill, but make sure the cat is locked in another room, or big trouble will result.

5. Think of being put on hold, like an extended coffee break. Tape the phone to your ear, make some cookies, read the paper, wash the floor, do the laundry, etc.

6. The hold music was designed to make you want to hang up. I am sure there are subliminal messages in it, coaxing you to do this. It is trying to be like The Borg. But by listening to your own chewing and swallowing of cookies and coffee, you can resist the temptation. Maybe it is time to invest in some gum.

And now our bill is actually correct, or at least the version in the company's computer is supposed to be corrected. There are about two hours of my life I will never get back, but oh the joy of getting ones own way.
And I wonder why I have not been making art lately.....


Brian and Becky said...

I think phone companies were designed to put you thru this action. Did you notice what apparatus was involved in the transaction? THE PHONE!!!!

Francesca~ Montague , Michigan said...

your gonna have to teach ME
how to do things on here.
Great conversations you are having.


Sharon ( Francescaspaintings)