Cheap chocs = laxatives

‘Nuff said.

On another note, I wonder if I am pregnant, would that someone owe up and take responsibility? Or could he take the coward’s way and run away (he’s spoken of suicide before, but I don’t think he has the stomach for it)?

Knowing him, I’d say he’d take the coward’s way. Which then brings me to the point; I understand why he locked me out of his LJ. He did have something to hide, and from what I found out, the person he’s *trying* to hide is not a total stranger as he claims, but someone dear to me (I wouldn’t say close cause we are not).

Really, own up to your own cock-ups, why don’t you? (and yes, you know I’m pissed when I start cursing). You say that you’re doing this for my own good, and that you’re breaking it simply because it’s too perfect, but you know what?

I think it simply means that you’re afraid to live.

You’re afraid that people will see you for what you choose to be; a sham.

You have the potential to be original, but as you find it too difficult, you settle for claiming that you are someone that you are not. In the end, you become terribly afraid when the original shows up, cause as we all know; nothing’s better than the original unless the copycat becomes well… original.

You quote from so many places, you say these all apply to you, but in the end anyone who’s been with you for a bit and bothers to dig just a bit below the surface sees you for what you are; a pale imitation of a guy who could have been truly great.

Flawed? Of course. We are humans, after all.

Breaking something just because you can’t stand it’s perfection? Childish.

You want to be a shelter for all, but can you shelter yourself? Can you protect the ones who need protecting without resorting to childish measures?

You’re like a child who’s been given a pet who loves it unconditionally, but still you insist on hurting it simply because, “You can.” No, I don’t think it’s because you can, but like that child, you don’t understand. But while that is forgiveable in a child, it is not in an adult like you.

In the end, when the pet runs away, will you chase after it? Or will you let it go, shrug it off, and hope someone will give you a new toy to play with?

You will run out of toys to plan by then. When you’re old and lonely, I wonder, what will you think then? Will you rue the opportunities missed?

You know what I hate most of all? I hate that because of you, I’m turning into someone I don’t like. Because you, unlike the others, got the deepest into my skin.

And when you twisted the knife, you burned an essential part of me away. And I don’t know if I can go back to her.

I know this sounds selfish, but I can’t stop loving you. Maybe with time, it’ll fade, or as someone said, it’ll dull to a bearable ache.

I don’t know. At this point in time I really don’t know.


The parts in bold were written before the first get-together, so they may or may not apply. The rest were written today. ^_^

*Muttergrumble* You are far too chirpy today.

*Happily* Someone has to. At least you weren’t around when she *points to her bleary-eyed sister* went on a drinking binge.

You weren’t the one getting wasted because your mun decided you should. *Groan*