Connect the Dots Ginger | Becky Allen: Tips to Dealing With The Chaos As Mom

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Tips to Dealing With The Chaos As Mom

I'm a stay at home mom, but don't stop reading if you aren't because even working moms feel the same way. We as mother's deal with a lot of screaming, temper tantrums, frustrations and don't get me started on the motherlode diapers that reach all the way to the head. EWWW!

Every morning I have a toddler screaming at me to make his "Eggies, jelly and cow mark, NOW" A dog trying to kill me to get my attention to feed him and a baby screaming at me because a) he is hungry and b) he wants to be picked up. But somehow I don't really hear it. I get into my little zone where I just work and say to everyone, "It takes a little time to make everything." I try to get Mason to feed the dog, because that is his chore and eventually he does but then it is the chase to try and get Collin to not eat the dog food. Yeah, we have a dog food eater!

But we learn to deal with the chaos as a mother. The same scenario happens at dinnertime too. How do we learn as mother's do deal with this? When I was recovering from my surgery Matt said that it took 2 people to do my job and still they weren't as good as what I did. Sometimes it can get frustrating. Sometimes we lose our cool. Sometimes we just can't do it anymore. Here are some tips to help combat the chaos.

1. Work really hard not to yell. It is so easy just to do it to get their attention but it is hurtful to them and they will never forget it. Even this morning, I raised my voice to have Mason close the back door. Because I didn't hear him do it and he has been leaving the door open. Mason ran and hid because he didn't want to get in trouble. He actually did close the door and I raised my voice at him. Why am I telling you this? Because this is something I am working on every single day. I am trying to sit down with Mason and explain things to him in a calm rational way so that he can learn and I don't want him to be scared of me. That ain't cool!

2. Deep breathing. This helps me because I can feel my boiling point rise, and rise so I have to just tune them out, as hard as it can be sometimes, but I just focus on me so that I don't scream and yell and lose my cool! So I deep breath to help me relax a little.

3. Count to 10 slowly. My dad told me this advice. Count to 10 before you react. So that you don't over react and regret something in the end. Kids are an open letter. They wear they heart on the sleeves. They show their emotions without any filters. If you over react they will learn to over react.

4. Show them love. Always tell them that you love them. Show them that you love them every chance you can get. Give them a hug. Tell them how awesome they are. Let them learn to trust you. Let them know you love them.

5. Have fun and teach them at the same time. If it is safe ask for their help. I have Mason count the eggs. The ones in the carton and the ones in the pan and how many are left after I put them in the pan. It keeps them occupied and entertained and lets them learn too. Doesn't help much with Collin but it can help teach him patience. And he wants to do everything that Mason does so if Mason is calm he usually is too!

Life as a mom is not always stressful and full of chaos. There are some pretty amazing times too and I look to those memories and love and cherish them more and more everyday because I will never get those memories again. Brothers meeting for the first time. First baths together. 2 boys playing together for the first time. I love my life, the amazing, the noisy and the chaos!
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