Gamers Scrambling To Figure Out Which Presidential Candidate Is More Meta

We gamers know how bad it can feel to make a suboptimal decision. Whenever there could be a winner and a loser, no serious gamer is willing to accidentally make a low-tier pick. That’s why gamers have been rushing to establish the meta of the 2020 US presidential election before it happens.

We interviewed political scientist Gabe Newell for his take on the current meta in the US. “While Trump did take home the W in 2016,” Newell says, “the competitive scene has advanced a lot in four years. Many Americans have come to consider him a substandard pick; in fact, it’s frankly odd that he’s even gotten this far. Still, I’m glad Hillary isn’t running again. I don’t think America wanted to watch a salty runback like that. Unlucky.”

Some gamers insist that the US government dev team has been slacking off and that the election needs an array of new balance patches. “Trump is clearly OP,” tweets political activist Tyler1. “Even if it seems like he’s going to lose, he might just claim that Biden is hacking and declare himself the winner anyway. This is obviously a pretty serious exploit, but it’s one that the servers don’t have a fix for yet. The US Constitution has some pretty gnarly spaghetti code. I just hope that, if that happens, the opposition won’t be too tilted to push back.”

Many players argue that the Democratic party is in need of a serious rework, citing progressive issues like universal healthcare and defunding the police. It’s unclear whether Biden’s commitment to small, incremental patches rather than sweeping overhauls will be successful. “The Dems have been running the same playbook for decades,” says political analyst VideoGameDunkey in a five-minute YouTube video. “I think we needed to see them mix things up during this split. The same old strat might not cut it this time, but many voters will pick anything over Trump due to how obviously broken he is, so we’ll see.”

While the debate is still out on whether Biden or Trump is more favored by the current meta, third party picks such as Howie Hawkins and Jo Jorgensen are widely agreed upon as trash-tier plays and have no competitive value other than disrespect. However, nothing is worse than players who insist upon writing in “Deez Nuts.”
