Creative Fortune Cookies


Dr, Gary, Davis, Clueless, Christianity, NEEDinc, fortune, cookies, predict, FunnyDon’t you just love the pseudo-prophets who write your future in the fold of a Chinese fortune cookie?!? I mean, how do they know so much about me? How can they offer so many people the hope and revelation they have sought for all their lives, or at least since the won-ton soup?!? Amazing!

             If, like me, you’ve eaten in Chinese restaurants w-a-y too often, you’ve read every fortune cookie imaginable. And that gets you mad! “Can’t they come up with anything just a little more original?”  I’ve always wanted to create a few fortunes myself. Like—

The egg-roll you just ate was poison.

 The person across the table is recording your conversation.

 Oh, and he has a gun aimed at you under the table.

 You will be married this time next week.

 Your baby’s gender will be male; species yet unknown.

 Wherever you go, that’s where you are; unless you’re not here.

 Eat more horse.

 Depression is good for high blood pressure.

 Never fear the unknown. Discover it.

 God is not out to get you. I am.

 Does your wife know you’re here?

             Whatever your “fortune” holds remember that you are the one ultimately responsible for what comes about in your life. Well, unless you put yourself in God’s hands; and that can be a risky business in itself. Maybe the government, or the church will…, nah, never mind.

Fortune cookies are fun; some more than others. No one wants to entrust their future to some dumb artificially flavored, colored thingy with a piece of paper cooked inside. But life is about trusting— in your own abilities, and in others. Learn to do it. Risky— yes. Worth it— also yes.

Maybe you can write a couple zingers along the way that will make the Fortune Cookie Hall of Fame.

For what it’s worth,