People Are Sharing Their Favorite Dad Jokes And These Are Good

This? It's just for show...

My grandmother always lived with us, and when all her children and grandchildren would come for a visit, we always ended up gathering such a big crowd.
Once they left, she would always say, "I'm glad they came, but I'm even happier that they're gone."
Haydée Vaquier Velázquez / Via

When I was in school, I used to go to my dad and be like, "Daddy..." and every single time, before I could go on to ask him anything else, he would say, "I can't, I don't want to, and I don't have any more." He wouldn't miss a chance to do it, he always made me so upset.
Maria Eugenia Morales Zazueta / Via


When I was a kid and couldn't watch TV because I was grounded, I would ask my dad if I could watch it and he would always say, "You can watch it, but don't turn it on."
Oscar Rubio / Via

My father has a scar that's very hard to miss on one of his hands and whenever a nephew, or now a grandchild, asks him whatever happened to him, he always answers that once, when he went to the jungle, he was attacked by a tiger or a crocodile. We, his daughters, don't laugh at the joke anymore, because he also told us the same thing as a child so many times and, depending on the animals he mentions, we say: "But wasn't it this or that?" and we end up talking about a different animal than the one he first mentioned. Then he laughs and says we shouldn't ruin his story.
Alejandra Saenz Mateus / Via

My dad always had this watch that didn't really work. If someone asked what time it was, he just answered: "This? It's just for show..."
Justo Contreras / Via

Whenever my husband asks the price of a car, he will say, "Oh, but does that include gas for life or what?" And I have to pay for his bad joke too. I'm over there dying of embarrassment because the salesman often makes the typical "that's not funny" face.
Reyna Corona / Via


My dad always used to tell us that if we behaved well during the week, he'd take us out for dinner. So when the time to "eat out" finally came, he said: "buckle up you guys, let's get ready to go out. Please take the dinner table to the garden, together with the chairs. Trying to keep my promises here." That always made us laugh. Eventually he did take us out. FYI
Ruben Sanchez / Via

When my dad introduces my sister and me to someone he knows, he says, "They're really smart kids, just like their father." Most people laugh because they think he's complimenting himself, but he wraps it up by saying, "Oh, but never mind, you don't know their dad, of course."
Cesar Palazuelos / Via

My dad would drive us crazy when we went out to eat in nice restaurants. He wanted his coffee before the orders were taken and then every time the waitress came to the table with anything to be served to anyone, dad would lift his coffee cup up in the air and look at the bottom of it then show it to the waitress and tell her the cup had a hole in the bottom of it and he'd like another cup of coffee.
Patti Miller / Via

When my mom would come up to my dad from behind and poke him in the shoulder, he would turn around and say, "don't poke me in the back, you know I'm a man used to danger and I could grab your hand, pull you over my shoulder, and slam you on the ground thinking you're an enemy." My mother would turn around and laugh at his witticisms.
Vazquez Manolo / Via

Whenever my dad would buy something, he had this funny way of complaining about the price.
So for instance, if he bought a carton of milk, when the cashier told him the price he'd answer back: "Can I get the price without the cow, please?" That always made me laugh.
Yamic Antonio Criollo Tulcan / Via

Preview photo credit: Oscar Rubio /