Fix Distributed Fused Adam Issues
> Overall looks good, although we are still hashing out the design in [NVIDIA/apex#1794](https://github.com/NVIDIA/apex/pull/1794). As discussed in [NVIDIA/apex#1794 (comment)](https://github.com/NVIDIA/apex/pull/1794#issuecomment-2050894033), I think we should set `MegatronDistributedFusedAdam._step_support_amp_scaling=False` to signal that the NeMo grad scaler can accommodate the distributed optimizer (unlike the plain PyTorch grad scaler). As a bonus, this approach fixes the grad scaling issue even without needing to update Apex.

You are probably right, to make sure it won't hurt perf I need to confirm with our usecases. Anyway, I think that relates to the changes in APEX, the changes here have no relation to gradient clipping. jenkins jenkins
# What does this PR do ?

This PR fixes distributed optimizer issues:

1. Support NHWC layout, as required by Diffusion models;
2. Fix complex `zero_grad()` being not captured by CUDA graph;
3. Add option to distribute states within node;

**Collection**: [Note which collection this PR will affect]

# Changelog 
- Add specific line by line info of high level changes in this PR.

# Usage
* You can potentially add a usage example below

```python
# Add a code snippet demonstrating how to use this 
```

# Jenkins CI
To run Jenkins, a NeMo User with write access must comment `jenkins` on the PR.

# Before your PR is "Ready for review"
**Pre checks**:
- [ ] Make sure you read and followed [Contributor guidelines](https://github.com/NVIDIA/NeMo/blob/main/CONTRIBUTING.md)
- [ ] Did you write any new necessary tests?
- [ ] Did you add or update any necessary documentation?
- [ ] Does the PR affect components that are optional to install? (Ex: Numba, Pynini, Apex etc)
  - [ ] Reviewer: Does the PR have correct import guards for all optional libraries?
  
**PR Type**:
- [x] New Feature
- [x] Bugfix
- [ ] Documentation

If you haven't finished some of the above items you can still open "Draft" PR.


## Who can review?

Anyone in the community is free to review the PR once the checks have passed. 
[Contributor guidelines](https://github.com/NVIDIA/NeMo/blob/main/CONTRIBUTING.md) contains specific people who can review PRs to various areas.

# Additional Information
* Related to # (issue)
