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"my mom: me puestes mandar unos gotero que se llama ""me vale madre"" jajajaja" | "my mom: can you send me some eye drops that are called 'I don't give a fuck' haha" |
<user> only if u get on the bungiee jump sino no invito al rodeo jajajaja | <user> only if you get on the bungy jump otherwise no inviting you to the rodeo hahaaha |
i gave my cook off ticket too my sister jajaja traigo wevaaa al mil. | I gave my cooking competition ticket to my sister jajaja I'm sooooo lazy . |
<user> jajaja pobre perrioo jajaja thts what i thought lol & well my dogs potty trained thts why my mom was ok with it jajaja | <user> jajaja poor doggo jajaja that's what i thought lol & since my dog is potty trained my mom said it's fine jajaja |
<user> si estaba la mia nd then i got one cuz yolo lmao & now she love the dog more than me jajajaja | <user> if mine was there nd then i got one because yolo lmao & now she loves the dog more than me hahaaha |
<user> no le digas asi a mi bebe <user> jajaja es zorrisima jk lmao jajaja | <user> don't call my baby like that <user> lol she's such a teasing little shit lmao jajaja |
<user> hes a good doctor porque si te cura pero i dont like how he handles needles lmao :( jajaja | <user> He's a good doctor because he can heal you pero I don't like how he deals with needles lmao :( hahaaha |
<user> hell yeah me too lol he has no heart cuando te pone la injection ni avisa y ay te deja casi llorando jajaja :-( | <user> hell yeah me too lol he has no heart when he gives you the injection without warning and leaves you almost crying jajaja :-( |
<user> pos te iva dar el mio pero me mandaste alachingada con ese tweet jajajajja jk | <user> I was gonna give you mine but you sent me some bullshit with that tweet lol jk |
<user> they have twitter jail if u tweet over 1,000 tweets in 1hr hahaha preguntale a gustavo jajaja he knows lmfao | <user> they have twitter jail if you tweet over a thousand tweets in 1 hour hahaha ask gustavo jajaja he knows lmfao |
<user> cayateee manitaaa si te gustara el twitter no saldrias de aqui hahahaha lmao | <user> shut up little hand if you liked Twitter you wouldn't leave here hahaha lmao |
<user> si tienes directtv or dish or comcast lo pasan mas tarde en los canales del otro pedaso del pais lol idk what their called lmao | <user> if you have directtv or dish or comcast they air it later on channels from the other half of the country lol i have no idea what they're called lmao |
<user> dude me too jajajaja its so funny tambien el de la vaca lmao | <user> dude me too jajajaja it's so funny the cow one too lmao |
"<user> diles, ""u don't know what type a cereal i like or con cuantas tortas lleno"" jajajaja" | <user> Tell them , "You don't know what kind of cereal I like or how many tortas I can fill . " haha |
<user> muajajajaja ya te descubri ante todo twitter lmfao | <user> muajajajaja I've found you out on all of twitter lmfao |
<user> coming from the one that told me she could kill me nd nobody would find out lmfao hahahaha tu tambien eres pshycopath bff hahaha | <user> coming from the one who told me she could kill me and nobody would find out lmfao hahahaha you too are a psychopath best friend hahaha |
<user> la matamos y la aventamos en el vayuco lmao haahaha lmao | <user> we waste her/him and toss her/him in da wagon lmao hahaha lmao |
<user> ya tu sabe mami hahaha lmaoooo | <user> you already know mami hahaha lmaoooo |
<user> do a corrido today nd then a bolero tommorrow | <user> do a corrido today and then a bolero tomorrow |
<user> corrido. & then a bolero lmao | <user> Mariachi marathon. & then a serenade lmao |
"my dad got mad cuz i told him he need a iphone nd he said ""me gusta mi cell de tapita no estes jodiendo"" jajajaja :( oh lmao" | "my dad got mad because i told him he needed an iphone and he said ««me gusta mi cell con tapa , no me jodas»» jajaja :( oh lmao" |
<user> como se llama esa app i wanna play it lmfao | <user> how's that app called , I wanna play it lmfao |
i'm gonna go get a mani pedi. | I'm gonna go get un mani/pedi. |
i wanna see la leyenda but then i already saw em twice nd ive seen igualados twice too. ugh | I want to see *La Leyenda* but then I've already seen them twice , and I've seen *Igualados* twice as well . Ugh ! |
<user> ayyy si porque con estos hombres ta cabron jajaja they are so not romantic lmao | <user> ayyy si porque con estos hombres está difícil jajaja they're so not romantic LOL |
<user> mines worse he went nd bought her a rosal pa ya no comprarle flores el otro año lmao | <user> mine's worse he went and bought her a rose garden so no need to buy her flowers next year lmao |
i look like a zombie with no make up ocupo dormir lmao | I look like a zombie without makeup . I need some sleep lmao |
“<user>: <user> las dejaste plantadas cabrona! ” it was on accident lol they didn't get mad tho lmao | “<user>: <user> You left them hanging , you bitch ! ” it was on accident lol they didn't get mad tho lmao |
<user> yo iba ir a cenar con mi ermana y mi vecina y me kede dormida lmao i felt bad cuz they were waiting on me lmao | <user> I was going to have dinner with my sister and my neighbor and I fell asleep lmao i felt bad because they were waiting on me lmao |
apenas me acabo de levantar and i still feel horrible!! ugh | I just woke up and I still feel horrible! Ugh! |
<user> <user> go too cavenders y tambien ve a <user> | <user> <user> go too cavenders and also go to <user> |
<user> <user> se llama la telephone jajaja jk lmao vas a venir pa ca? | <user> <user> it's called the telephone jajaja just kidding lol are you coming over? |
yessss bff aver pa donde nos vamos este weekend;) <user> | yessss bff let's see where we're going this weekend ; ) <user> |
today was wierd i didnt txt my bff <user> va llover!!!!! | Today was weird, I didn't text my best friend <user> It's gonna rain!!!! |
my dad don't wanna take me too nl with him porque siempre me voy pa mty a los antros hahahaha. | My dad doesn't want to take me to NL with him because I always go to the clubs in MTY . hahahaha . |
i wanna try those chamofresa chamochela bullshits but el heartburrrrn! ta cabron | I want to try those damn chamofresa chamochela bullshits but el heartburn ! That's a motherfucker ! |
<user> si la foto jajajaja it was too funny lmfao!! | <user> If the photo jajajaja it was too funny LMFAO!! |
“<user>: i should get something to eat. ” y me trais a mi tambien okay okay okay ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok. lmao | “<user>: I should get something to eat . ” And don't forget me too please please please ok ok ok . lmao |
<user> lmao hahaha ayyy que saludable lmao | <user> lmao hahaha damn so healthy lmao |
<user> <user> y al whiskey river lmao | <user> <user> and to the whiskey river lmao |
<user> add me no me deja acer reply lol | <user> add me it won't let me reply lol |
<user> orita alas 9 lo van a volver a pasar lol im so watching it again jajaja | <user> they're gonna air it again at 9 sharp lol i'm so watching it again haha |
<user> si jajaja lmao con el platano se quita o: im gonna eat like 3 lmao | <user> yeah haha lmao you can use banana to remove it or : im gonna eat like 3 lmao |
“<user>: <user> guebona damn lol ” mira lo que importa esque dormi bien jajaja | “<user>: <user> you're damn right lol ” the important thing is that I slept well haha |
<user> nd then aste la dormida i do tht too vicky when im bored lmaooo or i hold her nose from breathing its so funny lmaoo | <user> and then I do the "dormida" too Vicky , when I'm bored lmaooo , or I hold her nose so she can't breathe , it's so funny lmaoo . |
<user> <user> fuck it we down!! lmaoo jaja alcabo estamos jovenes lmao | <user> <user> fuck it we're good!! lmaoo haha we're young anyways lmao |
niggas these days are all full of shit they talk too you, then they try too get with your girlfriends smh jajajaj que asco dan enserio | Niggas these days are all full of shit , they talk to you , then they try to fuck your girlfriends smh jajaja they're gross for real . |
<user> <user> y te ponemos happy lmaoo | <user> <user> and we'll make you happy lmaoo |
<user> we should!! i'm down:) y nos llevamos a <user> lmao! y la ponemos peda hahahaha | <user> we should!! i'm in:) and we take <user> lmao! and get her drunk hahahaha |
<user> yase smh no ahy pedo cuando venga mi income tax nos vamos tu y yo pa rieles y we pop bottles y no lo invitamos x mamon!! | <user> we already know smh no use talking now , when my income tax comes we're going hard you and I , and we'll pop some bottles , and we won't invite him because he's such a dick! |
<user> miraaa pero que feo porque no nos iso txt ni nada pa invitar alrrato va poner pics de bottellas en ig smh lmao | <user> look how mean , he didn't even text us to invite us , and now he'll post bottle pics on Instagram smh lmao |
<user> nambee vi su face y dijo que se va ir pa rieles lmao | <user> just saw their post on the Book Face and they said they're heading to the trainyards lmao |
<user> ay perdon oseaa by con mi vidaaa lmao | <user> oh sorry or something like that with my life lmao |
<user> jajaja tu tambn dont lie lmao | <user> you too , don't lie haha . |
<user> i'll move too mexico que se vaya ala chingada con sus chips da only chips i want in my system are lays chips y salsa chips | <user> I'll move to Mexico , fuck them all . The only chips i want in my system are Lays chips and salsa chips . |
<user> wtf really lmao y yo que muy aca despistandolee lmao!!! | <user> wtf really lmao and I'm just minding my business here lmao!!! |
<user> imma go too los cavasos tho jajaja lmao i'll bring u tacos nd other shit too lmao | <user> imma go too los cavasos though jajaja lmao i'll bring you tortas and other stuff too lmao |
esqueee ya no puedo tener tuirer public cuz my job jajajaja :( | It's kinda hard to have a Twitter account these days because of my job lol |
<user> omg yes fml pero queria ver movies | <user> omg yes fml but I wanted to watch movies in English. |
<user> i was watching santino vines yesterday me acorde de ti jajaja | <user> i was watching santino vines yesterday and it reminded me of you jajaja |
<user> esque me fui de viaje a miami pero ya regresee lmao jaja jk y tambien esque somos mujeres ocupadas lmao | <user> I literally went on a trip to Miami but I'm back already lmao lol also we're both busy af ladies lmao |
<user> quieres peliar bro eh eh eh | <user> do you wanna fight bro eh eh eh |
<user> it's cause my mom put the wrong chile powder y le puso cayanne pepper lmao. & jaja se oyo de doble sentido smh lmao. | <user> It's because my mom used the wrong chili powder, she used cayenne pepper lmao . & haha it sounded like a double entendre smh lmao . |
my mom put the wrong chile powder y le echo cayanne pepper a mis pepinos me wa morir! | My mom put the wrong chilli powder and she added cayenne pepper to my cucumbers I'm gonna die! |
eating pepino with chile was the worst idea omg. | Eating cucumber with chile was the worst idea omg. |
"“<user>: <user> a"" hector ""le voy a dedicar ven by invasores lmao! ” <user>" | “<user>: I'm going to dedicate ""ven by invasores lmao "" to <user> !” <user> |
<user> i know me too <user> te amooo | <user> I know me too <user> te quieroo so much / love you |
idk how ppl can go too the club every weekend yo si voy es una vez cada dos meses si esque me animo jajaja. | I don't know how people can go to the club every single weekend , I go like once every two months if I'm in the mood , haha . |
“<user>: i need to delete all my pictures on my phone cause no more storage ” asi estoy yo | <user>: I need to delete all my pictures on my phone because no more storage left . That's how I am right now , with zero space . |
<user> omg ni paque voy a verla jaja mejor me compro una preparada lmao | <user> omg I'm not even gonna bother watching it haha I'll just buy a premade one lmao |
omg si somos de cadereyta i got country playin on one side of the house and gangsta rap in the other side | omg yes we're from cadereyta i've got country music playing on one side of the house and gangster rap on the other side |
ahh fuck it alcabo es viernes i can come home after werrrrrk, and sleep haha. | Ahh fuck it it's Friday anyway , I can come home after work work , and sleep haha . |
omg this bitch never stops talking ya me dolio la cabeza!!!! | omg this bitch never stops talking, it literally gave me a headache! |
i love working with my sis only sometimes jaja cuando paga el lonche jkjk lmaoo | I love working with my sis only sometimes haha when she buys lunch LOL just kidding LMAO |
omg i feel horrible. creo que me estoy enfermando | omg i feel horrible. i think i'm getting sick. |
i slept 2hrs voy a tener cara de zombie todo el dia jaja | I slept two hours , I'm gonna have zombie face all day haha . |
<user> que paso are u okay bby? :( | <user> what happened , are you okay baby ? :( |
finally home me voy a dormir ala chingada | Finally home , I'm off to bed , fuck it . |
my sister's eating her papa asada nd me with my stupid healthy salad. no es de dios!!!!! :( | my sister's eating her papa asada while me with my stupid healthy salad . It's not fair !!!!! : ( |
<user> hell yeah dude i was born jamming too it since forever lol well cuz of my dad lol & omg yes!! sino pa q le dicen tejano day! | <user> hell yeah dude i was born listening to it forever lol well because of my dad lol & omg yes ! That 's why it 's called Tejano Day ! |
“<user>: <user> asi me gusta!! lol and dm your number we don't even have it ” go text ur hoes from ig bitch | “<user>: <user> me gusta así !! lol and dm your number we don't even have it yet . Go text your hoes from Instagram , bitch” |
<user> <user> yo soy werita de los unaited estates af amerika lmao jk | <user> <user> i am a little girl from the united states of america lmao jk |
i'm go see jason aldean y lo voy a secuestrar antes de su concierto asique no compren tickets porque no va cantar. jajajajaja | I'm going to kidnap Jason Aldean before his concert so don't buy tickets because he's not gonna sing. haha. |
y luego cuando venga bobbypulido tambien lo secuestro y sere feliz toda la vida jajajajaja jk lmao | And then when Bobby Pulido comes I'll kidnap him too and I'll be happy forever hahahaha just kidding LOL! |
i'm a go see jason aldean y lo voy a secuestrar ala chingada | I'm gonna go see Jason Aldean and kidnap his ass. |
“<user>:“ <user>: <user> ya mejor que see mate la candy ” <user> ” damn thts nice. | <user>: " <user>: <user> might as well go get the candy ourselves " <user> " damn that's a great idea." |
its like my mom didnt get the stop making tamales cuz the holidays are over memo jajaja | It's like my mom didn't get the memo that the holidays are over to stop making tamales lol |
my dad always says que el que se deja se apendeja lmao no se dejen apendejaaar jajaja | My dad always says that the one who gives in gets dumbed down LMAO don't get dumbed down, haha! |
<user> <user> how do u get an amber alert yo nunca agarro alerts de nada lmao | <user> <user> how do you always miss the alerts man I never get any lmao |
my dad said tht en sus tiempos no abia amber alert y si se perdia un chamako namas tenian otro y ya lmao hes so fkd up smh lmao | My dad said that in his day there were no amber alerts , if a kid went missing they'd just get another one , LOL he's so fucked up shaking my head LOL |
<user> jajaja fine i'll be team iphone forever aunque me cueste un brazo lmao | <user> haha fine i'll be an iPhone user forever even if it costs me an arm and a leg lmao |
this is the last iphone i get si este se desmadra im going back too android tan muy caros estos cellulares lmaoo | This is the last iPhone I get if this one fucks up I'm going back to Android they're too expensive lmaoo |
my mom comes in my room saying nose que le pike ala tableta y se puso un vieja cantando, lmao it was a beyonce song playing jajajaja | My mom comes in my room saying she doesn't know what got into the tablet and some old lady started singing, lmao it was a Beyonce song playing haha. |
“<user>: <user> lmfao tu y yo para forever ” yes bby | “<user>: <user> lmfao you and me forever ” yes bby |
<user> <user> <user> <user> <user> yo ando zero acohol:))) | <user> <user> <user> <user> <user> I'm sober af :))) |
<user> dame de tu bubulubu beibi lmao!!!! jajajaja jk | <user> give me some of your bubulubu baby lmao!!!! hahaha just kidding |
i hate jairo cuz he lives infront of tostada regia | I hate Jairo because he lives in front of the Tostada Regia. |
“<user>: siempre ando muerto de hambre. ” damn dawwwwwhhh tht sux | <user>: I'm always starving. Damn that sucks. |
<user> <user> that looks scary lmao cayateee me da un atake al corazon lmao | <user> <user> that looks scary lmao shut the fuck up it gives me a freaking heart attack lmao |
<user> damn i'm tired... of being gay lmaooo jajaja jk jk don't kill me fabo lmaoo | <user> damn i'm tired... of being homosexual lmaooo jajaja jk jk don't kill me fabo lmaoo |
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