crumb/onebench · Datasets at Fast360

text stringlengths 1 399
#blogcon2013 im here and if you so much as look at me without having a Verified Account my devices will emit an ear-piercing defense screech
a 38 year old man who is dressed like a school shooter is here too pick up his vitality supplements .
im pleased to report that this is a Jeans account.
The holidays are a difficult time for many people. Please call everyone you know and tell them their dick is normal looking
i know thiis isnt the popular circle jerk opinion, but people who swear while speaking to the 911 operator are gross
Eatinh a 26 dollar hoagie.
boot rust
about 85% of the people online are just absolute criminals and i can get dominated by them perfectly from the convenience of my shitty modem
harvard geniuses/ scientists love to wind down by going on boards and posting threads named like "What is the screen resolution of a mirror"
every one who has ever retweeted my shit owes me $125 for sharing my personal data, full stop
it used to be you didnt need a degree to become a philosopher yo u could just say shit like "Beer is the Merry Soul's Companion" constantly
LIAR: Free data plan. is absolutely not good. It's something I don't think we should want ME: Im not to touch this one with a 10 foot pole
i may be wrong, i may be stupid, i may have gotten my son murdered, but at least my clothes arent coverred in SHIT
if u consider yourlsef part of Grit Culture just because you r dog shed all over your shirt then get the F.O. and dont comeback
i for one will be taking the high road by reserving judgement for the really good grumpy cat movie until ive seen it and bought the blueray.
IS BLUE TOILET WATER A RETRO 90S THING OR HAVE I JSUT NOT SEEN A CLEAN TOILET FOR 13+ YEARS. PLEASE HELP
calling my wife, screeching, telling her theres a bomb in the computer so she wont log on & see ChronoAzusa's post calling me a girl Replier
"Do tip your pimp today." -Mr. Sex Work
just tried to search twitter for "im a virgen" but i posted it instead, then frantically deleted it #thiswickedwebweweave #misery #Pride
bill mahrer should go off on guys who poop their pants
the new shit is MyBeerNumber. you will attend a Tasting with an authorized brewer and dtetermine your MyBeerNumber. my MyBeerNumber is "4"
lot of stupid shit going on in my replys. must be FUCK MY ASS day on twitter...
No results found for "BORN TO GO FUCK MYSELF"
if death regulation affects my god-given ability to put holes in garbage and animals really loudly i will kiss the toilet 1000 times and die
i was already boycotting disney mulan because its for children, but now that im pissing off hong kong policemen (??) thats the cherry on top
phaw!! 2am!.. time to go hit the hay (jacks off and comes back ot the computer)
steps out on stage twirling a cane and accidentally hits self in the dick 100 times AAAWGHHH
http://t.co/QlbDYzU1sD calling all my dubai followers to step up and pour a bottle of htis down my ass crack
Ohh!! THe agony of it all! Im sorry!! Im so so sorry! The pain my POSTS have caused! How many more must SUFFER? I cant stop! Its to good
I do oft in times flush my waste as soon as possible. I have no desire to look at it. I would rather be reading expensive novels to my wife.
i just cracked into aCiDnEt and got my grubby mitts on BigCasper's [No_Incest] edit of the spike lee oldboy remake and im sippin #DraftBeer
Food $200 Data $150 Rent $800 Candles $3,600 Utility $150 someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying
once again, dick clark's diaper drops miserably around his ankles precisely at the stroke of midnight, signifying a grim year to come #2012
when i see people putting up foul language on to the feed, all i can do is laugh, knowing that they will never get their posts read on Ellen
i'm convinced that people only favorite my tweets so that they can use them to fuck me over in court at a later time, since they're not good
hello. what is your online user handle please? ok. ok thanks. blocked
once again i apologize
my new stant up special whats the name of it
"I love him. Thank you" - fucking idiot senator Chuck Grassley (IA-R) on the death of the honorable Mr. Ayatollah
up until i was about 28, i thought "the 9 to 5 " was a euphemism for blasting cum
2012 ready???? Hm Lets See opens uhaul truck full of diapers which proceed to spill all over the dairy queen parking lot
i think when we get caught up in our gadgets and email, we forget to sit down and appreciate that time-tested classic doritos
if you want a verified account on this website you gotta drink Pepsi ONE‚Ñ¢. the food board recommends drinking 1800 Pepsi ONE‚Ñ¢s a day
ive invented entire schools of philosophy just to discard them outright. just 1 second of my thoughts would make Plato shit out his panties.
wish Obama would authorize some drone strikes against my ex-wife! the act takes a more serious tone Instead of doing Benghazi.
with all of the running around we do during the holidays... its a wonder we don't LOOSE weight instead of gaining it... #TheThursdayNiteRant
"don't tread of me", the famous words of that good snake who doesn't want to get stepped on, the noble slithering bastard I relate to most
snubbed again by the 2012 Skeleton Awards; tore my skin off for naught
just remember what it is we're all fighting fo.r... http://t.co/ucS2wcLgje
Although listed as a baby cowboy hat it is actually more the size for a 5-6 year old child. Needlessly to say, I returned it for a refund.
digging thorugh all the trash cans and dumpsters at e3 in search of condoms containing genetically superior gamer cum
new idea "Golden money" some times when getting money you will get golden money instead which is worth 10x the amount of normal money
"Device Lets Fully Paralyzed Rats Walk Again" -bunkum. i for one will not put up with this resurgence of walking rats and my followers agree
Bot.
every now and then i like to treat myself to a bit of "Lying under oath"
What is it that you first seek when inspecting a profile which presents a potential networking opportunity
ok so twitter can just freeze all the verified accounts at once but when someone says my yard looks like shit theyre Suddenl;y powerless...
cant wait for all nerds on earth to upload their brain to computer so they can be bat man for the rest of their lives & stop fuckinh posting
pleased to report that my odds of having sex have dropped to 0 after my latest and greatest Grievance Thread
thinking about some computer slob clicking on my Like button‚Äî right after touching his nasty dick. hey buddy; i dont want that shit. Keep it
somebody send me .xml file detailing the satanic rituals that Abercrombie and Fitch CEO Mike Jeffries employs to retain his eternal beauty
http://www.cornbird.com/goods/draw/diaperbrothers.png horrible
apologies to guys named "clay". that's like one step above dirt
watching hours of people on you tube destroying "Dennis The Menace" logically to max out my SAT scores and live my Best life
im the guy in the incognito browser icon who jacks off wearing a trenchcoat and sunglasses
just read a fascinating article, about how people who try to "Fuck" have the same chemical imbalances in their brain, that the cave men had
i challenge my most hated Enemys to name a single chemical that exists naturally within a womens pussy. You cant do it
they want to build a masque on the sunken remains of the titanic; dont let um
wwow. howd that happen. i honestly dont know how a bunch of pics of shirtless men got on my resume and youd probably be a shitty boss anyway
interseting. it appears "emotions" were basically just rrage faces that people did in real life, before online existed,
#AmexAlicia i HATE the aid bug
#GooglePlayMusic ha ha some guy spent a billion dollarsr to put this boring ass hashtag on the trending list. fuck you idiot
if you come to this website for jokes, rather than Experiences, youre Fucking yourself
please remember‚Äîif the holidays are a difficult time for you, if you feel left out or forgotten from the celebration, then go Fuck your self
watching big mommas house 2 in defiance of attack of small businesses
this web site sucks my fucking dick. it sucks balls (they add the 280 characters) you blew it. this website sucks shit now
so you DONT insure tupperware contaners filled with magazine cutouts of legs & feet? what if i told you some of these badboys are reagen era
((frowning) cause im the Apps Man (depression) YEah yeah im the apps man
guinness coming in 2 mins to film me breaking the coveted "most trash cans knocked over using piss" record but im too sad to put clothes on
my feed will suck absolute shit, for sure. but every one will love me
took failblog to court for putting puicture of my dick up, settled for $6. a victory, because im worht far less than that
to counter-act the terrible "ISIS", im starting my own group called "NICEis". what we do is give retweets & faves to the hopelessly decrepit
howd would youd like a taste of my butt cheek , Punk
surprise, dad. while you were witnessing the pennsylvania state lottery i tried on all your work gloves and they looked very handsome on me
kick birdseed into my neck as i tumble down a muddy staircas e into a pile of fluorescent lightbulsb while 100 tiny shits rolldown my pant
i sacrifice my most valuable gift card to the ocean to quell the intensity of the raging waters. forgive me, saladworks .
no heaven or hell when you die, everyone is just herded into a room with a big scoreboard saying which person blasted the most Cum
nude palestinian grandpa with micropenis tazed by BP oil executives in scuffle involving megan fox's $100,000 iphone; blogoverse implodes
point blank blasting a pair of jeans with a 120 decibel leaf blower at 6am even though i have been" warned about doing this"
full time Cash Back award activator
Jjust processed every news story on CNN as logically as humanly possible & had a strategic stroke that murdered the bias center of my brain
i do not know the official name of the pringles man. but it is NOT "bruce pringles", as the trolls often assert,
pringles caliphate
we succeed where many businesses fail, by offering a comprehensive program wherein I (Me) will run your dick over in my wheelchair, for free
By engaging with my Troll bait ,you hav e fallen directly into my ass. Good evening
god promised me in a dream that if joe biden & kamala harris get married they will adopt me as their boy. I watch them on the news every day
had that dream again. a Top Female Influencer grasped my hand and took me to my Forever Home..where i never have to demean myself by posting
think im going to start incorporating the word "Gadzooks" into more of my tweets, to punish my followers, for their constant insolence,
mount everest emergency diaper bra - what this husband did will shock you
California Tea Party to Use Dogs to Harass Muslim

#blogcon2013 im here and if you so much as look at me without having a Verified Account my devices will emit an ear-piercing defense screech

a 38 year old man who is dressed like a school shooter is here too pick up his vitality supplements .

im pleased to report that this is a Jeans account.

The holidays are a difficult time for many people. Please call everyone you know and tell them their dick is normal looking

i know thiis isnt the popular circle jerk opinion, but people who swear while speaking to the 911 operator are gross

Eatinh a 26 dollar hoagie.

boot rust

about 85% of the people online are just absolute criminals and i can get dominated by them perfectly from the convenience of my shitty modem

harvard geniuses/ scientists love to wind down by going on boards and posting threads named like "What is the screen resolution of a mirror"

every one who has ever retweeted my shit owes me $125 for sharing my personal data, full stop

it used to be you didnt need a degree to become a philosopher yo u could just say shit like "Beer is the Merry Soul's Companion" constantly

LIAR: Free data plan. is absolutely not good. It's something I don't think we should want ME: Im not to touch this one with a 10 foot pole

i may be wrong, i may be stupid, i may have gotten my son murdered, but at least my clothes arent coverred in SHIT

if u consider yourlsef part of Grit Culture just because you r dog shed all over your shirt then get the F.O. and dont comeback

i for one will be taking the high road by reserving judgement for the really good grumpy cat movie until ive seen it and bought the blueray.

IS BLUE TOILET WATER A RETRO 90S THING OR HAVE I JSUT NOT SEEN A CLEAN TOILET FOR 13+ YEARS. PLEASE HELP

calling my wife, screeching, telling her theres a bomb in the computer so she wont log on & see ChronoAzusa's post calling me a girl Replier

"Do tip your pimp today." -Mr. Sex Work

just tried to search twitter for "im a virgen" but i posted it instead, then frantically deleted it #thiswickedwebweweave #misery #Pride

bill mahrer should go off on guys who poop their pants

the new shit is MyBeerNumber. you will attend a Tasting with an authorized brewer and dtetermine your MyBeerNumber. my MyBeerNumber is "4"

lot of stupid shit going on in my replys. must be FUCK MY ASS day on twitter...

No results found for "BORN TO GO FUCK MYSELF"

if death regulation affects my god-given ability to put holes in garbage and animals really loudly i will kiss the toilet 1000 times and die

i was already boycotting disney mulan because its for children, but now that im pissing off hong kong policemen (??) thats the cherry on top

phaw!! 2am!.. time to go hit the hay (jacks off and comes back ot the computer)

*steps out on stage twirling a cane and accidentally hits self in the dick 100 times * AAAWGHHH

http://t.co/QlbDYzU1sD calling all my dubai followers to step up and pour a bottle of htis down my ass crack

Ohh!! THe agony of it all! Im sorry!! Im so so sorry! The pain my POSTS have caused! How many more must SUFFER? I cant stop! Its to good

I do oft in times flush my waste as soon as possible. I have no desire to look at it. I would rather be reading expensive novels to my wife.

i just cracked into aCiDnEt and got my grubby mitts on BigCasper's [No_Incest] edit of the spike lee oldboy remake and im sippin #DraftBeer

Food $200 Data $150 Rent $800 Candles $3,600 Utility $150 someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying

once again, dick clark's diaper drops miserably around his ankles precisely at the stroke of midnight, signifying a grim year to come #2012

when i see people putting up foul language on to the feed, all i can do is laugh, knowing that they will never get their posts read on Ellen

i'm convinced that people only favorite my tweets so that they can use them to fuck me over in court at a later time, since they're not good

hello. what is your online user handle please? ok. ok thanks. blocked

once again i apologize

my new stant up special whats the name of it

"I love him. Thank you" - fucking idiot senator Chuck Grassley (IA-R) on the death of the honorable Mr. Ayatollah

up until i was about 28, i thought "the 9 to 5 " was a euphemism for blasting cum

2012 ready???? Hm Lets See *opens uhaul truck full of diapers which proceed to spill all over the dairy queen parking lot*

i think when we get caught up in our gadgets and email, we forget to sit down and appreciate that time-tested classic doritos

if you want a verified account on this website you gotta drink Pepsi ONE‚Ñ¢. the food board recommends drinking 1800 Pepsi ONE‚Ñ¢s a day

ive invented entire schools of philosophy just to discard them outright. just 1 second of my thoughts would make Plato shit out his panties.

wish Obama would authorize some drone strikes against my ex-wife! *the act takes a more serious tone* Instead of doing Benghazi.

with all of the running around we do during the holidays... its a wonder we don't LOOSE weight instead of gaining it... #TheThursdayNiteRant

"don't tread of me", the famous words of that good snake who doesn't want to get stepped on, the noble slithering bastard I relate to most

snubbed again by the 2012 Skeleton Awards; tore my skin off for naught

just remember what it is we're all fighting fo.r... http://t.co/ucS2wcLgje

Although listed as a baby cowboy hat it is actually more the size for a 5-6 year old child. Needlessly to say, I returned it for a refund.

digging thorugh all the trash cans and dumpsters at e3 in search of condoms containing genetically superior gamer cum

new idea "Golden money" some times when getting money you will get golden money instead which is worth 10x the amount of normal money

"Device Lets Fully Paralyzed Rats Walk Again" -bunkum. i for one will not put up with this resurgence of walking rats and my followers agree

Bot.

every now and then i like to treat myself to a bit of "Lying under oath"

What is it that you first seek when inspecting a profile which presents a potential networking opportunity

ok so twitter can just freeze all the verified accounts at once but when someone says my yard looks like shit theyre Suddenl;y powerless...

cant wait for all nerds on earth to upload their brain to computer so they can be bat man for the rest of their lives & stop fuckinh posting

pleased to report that my odds of having sex have dropped to 0 after my latest and greatest Grievance Thread

thinking about some computer slob clicking on my Like button‚Äî right after touching his nasty dick. hey buddy; i dont want that shit. Keep it

somebody send me .xml file detailing the satanic rituals that Abercrombie and Fitch CEO Mike Jeffries employs to retain his eternal beauty

http://www.cornbird.com/goods/draw/diaperbrothers.png horrible

apologies to guys named "clay". that's like one step above dirt

watching hours of people on you tube destroying "Dennis The Menace" logically to max out my SAT scores and live my Best life

im the guy in the incognito browser icon who jacks off wearing a trenchcoat and sunglasses

just read a fascinating article, about how people who try to "Fuck" have the same chemical imbalances in their brain, that the cave men had

i challenge my most hated Enemys to name a single chemical that exists naturally within a womens pussy. You cant do it

they want to build a masque on the sunken remains of the titanic; dont let um

wwow. howd that happen. i honestly dont know how a bunch of pics of shirtless men got on my resume and youd probably be a shitty boss anyway

interseting. it appears "emotions" were basically just rrage faces that people did in real life, before online existed,

#AmexAlicia i HATE the aid bug

#GooglePlayMusic ha ha some guy spent a billion dollarsr to put this boring ass hashtag on the trending list. fuck you idiot

if you come to this website for jokes, rather than Experiences, youre Fucking yourself

please remember‚Äîif the holidays are a difficult time for you, if you feel left out or forgotten from the celebration, then go Fuck your self

watching big mommas house 2 in defiance of attack of small businesses

this web site sucks my fucking dick. it sucks balls (they add the 280 characters) you blew it. this website sucks shit now

so you DONT insure tupperware contaners filled with magazine cutouts of legs & feet? what if i told you some of these badboys are reagen era

((frowning) cause im the Apps Man (depression) YEah yeah im the apps man

guinness coming in 2 mins to film me breaking the coveted "most trash cans knocked over using piss" record but im too sad to put clothes on

my feed will suck absolute shit, for sure. but every one will love me

took failblog to court for putting puicture of my dick up, settled for $6. a victory, because im worht far less than that

to counter-act the terrible "ISIS", im starting my own group called "NICEis". what we do is give retweets & faves to the hopelessly decrepit

howd would youd like a taste of my butt cheek , Punk

surprise, dad. while you were witnessing the pennsylvania state lottery i tried on all your work gloves and they looked very handsome on me

kick birdseed into my neck as i tumble down a muddy staircas e into a pile of fluorescent lightbulsb while 100 tiny shits rolldown my pant

i sacrifice my most valuable gift card to the ocean to quell the intensity of the raging waters. forgive me, saladworks .

no heaven or hell when you die, everyone is just herded into a room with a big scoreboard saying which person blasted the most Cum

nude palestinian grandpa with micropenis tazed by BP oil executives in scuffle involving megan fox's $100,000 iphone; blogoverse implodes

point blank blasting a pair of jeans with a 120 decibel leaf blower at 6am even though i have been" warned about doing this"

full time Cash Back award activator

Jjust processed every news story on CNN as logically as humanly possible & had a strategic stroke that murdered the bias center of my brain

i do not know the official name of the pringles man. but it is NOT "bruce pringles", as the trolls often assert,

pringles caliphate

we succeed where many businesses fail, by offering a comprehensive program wherein I (Me) will run your dick over in my wheelchair, for free

By engaging with my Troll bait ,you hav e fallen directly into my ass. Good evening

god promised me in a dream that if joe biden & kamala harris get married they will adopt me as their boy. I watch them on the news every day

had that dream again. a Top Female Influencer grasped my hand and took me to my Forever Home..where i never have to demean myself by posting

think im going to start incorporating the word "Gadzooks" into more of my tweets, to punish my followers, for their constant insolence,

mount everest emergency diaper bra - what this husband did will shock you

California Tea Party to Use Dogs to Harass Muslim